Not a Parody
Not a Parody After four days of hearings, the House Ethics Commit- I tee concluded July 18 that Rep. James Traficant V should be expelled from the U.S. House of Representatives for ethics...
...News Item Highlights from the U.S...
...GREEN...
...Why not...
...Were you and I sex partners...
...All that money I helped you to get on transportation where those other people wouldn’t help you, and you were too timid to go forward, and I got you millions, you chicken...
...TRAFICANT...
...ON WHY HE WAS LATE TO THE HEARING MR...
...Everything else is...
...I am upset with you...
...TRAFICANT...
...What the hell...
...GBEEN...
...Traficant, if I might have your attention...
...Tubbs Jones asked about the size of the farm...
...I was on media broadcasts trying to demean you and the others...
...It is a 1970 Wooden Egg Harbor af t cabin, fly bridge, motor yacht...
...I got carried away in a “writ of fealous jage...
...I had two glasses of wine last night...
...TRAFICANT...
...TRAFICANT...
...I never hired a hooker, but some women did come looking for me, and I refused them, Chairman...
...House of Representatives for ethics violations...
...But I want you to know there were no Playboy bunnies there...
...TRAFICANT...
...FERRANTE...
...What brand and what size was the boat...
...I want to blow their time...
...And I thought it had some sentimental value, and I thought I could live in it cheaper than some apartment and have a little privacy...
...I am also curious about the boat again...
...THE CHAIRMAN...
...Then it got to the point where I couldn’t afford to keep it at gangplank and moved it to Anacostia, where it is cheaper, only about $110 a month...
...Both of the heads didn’t work, and she didn’t even want to stay there...
...It is old, but it was lovely inside, and I bought it from Senator Craig...
...House of Representatives Committee on Standards of Official Conduct hearings IN THE MATTER OF REPRESENTATIVE JAMES A. TRAFICANT JR., July 15-18, 2002 DISCUSSING HIS BOAT THE CHAIRMAN...
...The only woman I had there was my wife, and, quite frankly, she was fed up with the quarters...
...I probably shouldn’t have bought the boat...
...I should have just stayed in my office, but I just got tired of that, and I wanted to have Playboy bunnies come in and meet with me at nights, and I wanted to be promiscuous, so I did it...
...THE CHAIRMAN...
...Traficant, I think you mentioned yesterday, but clarify it for me, we talked a lot about the farm, and Mrs...
...The heads, by the way, are commodes...
...Green, you never have a question...
...NO questions...
...You do realize that is on the record, Mr...
...You could have eaten up about 10 minutes of their time for me...
...TRAFICANT...
...QUESTIONING HIS FRIENDLY WITNESS, SANDRA FERRANTE MR...
...I think I am still a little tipsy...
...I am sorry, Chairman...
...TRAFICANT...
...THE CHAIRMAN...
...I was curious about that...
Vol. 7 • July 2002 • No. 44
