Parody
Parody Bill and Hillary Clinton may not keep Socks, the cat, when they leave the White House, but may give him to secretary Betty Currie. —News item Book Proposal Socks: A Cat Scorned by Socks...
...Clinton was afraid he would scratch the cherry wain-scotting...
...But the project did allow Socks greater access to the First Lady s personal papers...
...Fortunately Socks had taken some precautions, as insurance for the future...
...It was a horrible moment for Socks...
...Socks will deliver a manuscript of 120,000 words on or about May 2002 forrelease just prior to Mrs...
...As they cruised around Washington Mr Jordan informed Socks that there was no room for him in the Clintons new $3 million Washington home...
...But that dream was shattered...
...In the midst of their term, the Clintons forced Socks to contribute to a book they hoPed to publish, Dear Socks...
...Barbara Bush got a bestseller out of her dog, i'11 be damned if 1 m not going to get one out of you...
...Rather he wants to tell a dignified story of ambition, lust, and betrayal that wil1 nail those Homo Sapiens bastards to the wall...
...Socks assumed that Ms...
...Socks had to drop the records and pretend to be It was a close call, and from then on Socks worked only at night...
...But the dream that sustained him during those dark times was based on the promises the president and first lady made to him- After the White House, after Chelsea had gone off to college...
...Socks doesn't want to exploit the Clintons for per-sonai gain...
...He knew that sometimes members _ of the pet community were sacrificed...
...Socks had seen what the Clintons had done to Kathleen Willey's dog...
...Public service was not always easy Socks had many ^^m lonely days in the White House, even by cat standards...
...Now Socks is ready to reveal the true story of the White House, as seen from 9 inches off the ground: the scandals the lies, the sex, and the turmoil...
...News item Book Proposal Socks: A Cat Scorned by Socks Clinton Represented by Mort Janklow, Literary Agent Auction date: February 5, 2001 Socks came to Washington with high ideals...
...Clinton's own book...
...They would move to a small house in Arkansas and spend their remaining days together, playing with balls of string...
...One day this past January Vernon Jordan swung by the White House and took Socks out for a ride in his limousine...
...Socks found the project demeaning, and not fully reflective of his literary talents...
...He saw his lives flash before his eyes...
...Socks would be Number 1 in their hearts...
...One day while Socks was sneaking off with the Rose Law Firm billing records, Hillary came and startled him...
...He is requesting payment in the form ot tuna one third upon signing, one third upon completion of a first draft, and third...
...Socks was to go home with Betty Currie, the keeper of the Bimbos...
...Hillary had screeched during one of their confrontations, before throwing a lamp...
...With his masters, Bill and Hillary Chnton, he hoped to serve the nation, to help build a bridge to the 21st century especially m regards to issues concerning Feline-Americans...
...So over the years, Socks had crept around the White House, seizing key documents, hiding them for safekeeping under his litter box...
...Currie would take Socks to the animal shelter and put him in that box that sucks all the oxygen out of the victims' lungs...
Vol. 6 • January 2001 • No. 18
