Parody
Parody At the Democratic fund-raiser, Gore shook his booty—and his Palm Pilot. —News Item THE VEEP Gore Caught in Love Tryst with Palm Pilot Vice President Al Gore's presidential campaign was...
...But listen to me...
...He calls it "Z23998YVP," apparently a reference to the serial code of a home electronics kit that Gore loved as a boy...
...Tipper Gore was quick to leap to her husband's defense...
...Journalists covering the Gore campaign have long noticed a strange intimacy between Gore and his Palm Pilot, and, increasingly, an unwillingness on the part of the Vice President to go anywhere without it...
...News Item THE VEEP Gore Caught in Love Tryst with Palm Pilot Vice President Al Gore's presidential campaign was thrown into turmoil after it was alleged that he is having a sexual relationship with his Palm Pilot...
...Yes, I do have a waterproof sack for it in case I need it in the shower," a startled Gore conceded when confronted with the allegations yesterday...
...Has it helped me open up the full flowering of my manhood...
...NEWSWEEK reported that Gore even has a pet nickname for his Palm Pilot...
...Yes, I do attach it to the belt loop of my jammies before I go to bed at night...
...Does my Palm Pilot give me satisfactions and pleasures that I never knew were possible...
...I want to make one thing clear...
...I did not have sexual relations with that organizer . . . the Palm Pilot...
...There's this vast, technopho-bic conspiracy that is trying to tear down my husband," she charged...
...But one of Al's great gifts,which he would bring to the White House, is his amazing ability to bond with inanimate objects, to improve relations between people ' and things...
...That depends on how you define sex," Gore replied defiantly...
...Reporters pressed him on whether his relationship with the Palm Pilot had become sexual...
...But they reveal an intense and ongoing physical relationship," one Newsweek editor revealed...
...Because of the explicit nature of the notes, Newsweek has decided not to publish them verbatim...
...There is no sexual relationship...
...A series of salacious notes that the presumptive Democratic nominee apparently entered into the memo pad section of his hand-held organizer were inadvertently beamed to another Palm Pilot and leaked to NEWSWEEK...
Vol. 5 • June 2000 • No. 37
