PARODY
Parody Among unheralded items in the 4,000-page federal budget approved last week were several grants endowing schools of higher education named after prominent former senators: $6 million to the...
...News item DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION BUDGET FOR FISCAL YEAR 1999 Appendix-57156 SPECIAL SELF-AGGRANDIZEMENT GRANTS TO USELESS ACADEMIC ENTERPRISES Senatorial Division: Program and Financing [in thousands of dollars] Barbara Boxer Finishing School for Young Ladies...
...Parody Among unheralded items in the 4,000-page federal budget approved last week were several grants endowing schools of higher education named after prominent former senators: $6 million to the Robert J. Dole Institute for Public Service and Public Policy at the University of Kansas...
...of Gay, Lesbian, and Kleptomaniac Studies, Ole Miss...
...0 Jesse Helms School for the Enjoyment of Tobacco Products . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 790,000 Outreach to Regional Schools, K-12 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 750,000 Mitch McConnell Center for Campaign-Finance Reform...
...1 million each to the Paul Simon Public Policy Institute at Southern Illinois University and the Mark O. Hatfield School of Government at Portland University...
...100,000 Towels, scented oils, misc...
...1,000,000 Charles Robb Institute of Swedish Massage...
...398,667 Salary to Bobbi D’Amato, Pres...
...345 Vending machines . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6,500,000 Anheuser-Busch/Edward M. Kennedy School of Bartending and Driver Education . . . . . . . . . . . . 605,000 Wages, salaries, and tips (waitresses at Bullfeathers) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50 The Barbara Mikulski Center for the Study of Human Sexuality...
...340,000 Hors d’oeuvres for Fund-raiser . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 340,000 Biden-Leahy College of Hair Care for Men...
...110,111 Special deportment grants . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12,980 Al D’Amato Institute for Public Integrity...
...50,000 Construction of Bill Clinton Memorial Lounge . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50,000 United States Senate Center for Reelection Studies . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1,600,000,000...
...100,000 Film strips and slides . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 75,000 Leather . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25,000 Trent Lott Dept...
...250 Salary and tips to Joey “The Prof” D’Amato . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 150 Salary to Dean Petey D’Amato...
Vol. 4 • November 1998 • No. 8
