PARODY
P arody BUMPERS OUTDOES HENRY CLAY, from A1 Bumpers's stirring oratory, has brought such previously wavering senators as Barbara Boxer (D-Cal.) and Tom Harkin (D-Iowa) firmly into the Clinton...
...It's that simple...
...At's what Hamilton—vurry handsome man, broad-shouldered, and probbly no stranger to feminine dee-lats hisself...
...Inna Oh-zorks, perjury ain't nothin' but a li'l itty-bitty, teensy-(see BLOWHARD, P. A4...
...Left arms and legs there...
...Ever hear the one about the leper anna prossitute...
...Ass what Hamilton was talkin' 'bout in Federalist 412...
...Don' tell mah warf...
...Ain't never once seen him put his hand on his zipper...
...The Senate gives me goosebumps...
...Lotta people killed at Guadalcanal...
...Revenooer in Les Misérables by Victor Hugo shore was a sumbitch...
...Schumer (D-N.Y...
...too, claims he was stirred by Bumpers's exposition of the moral subtleties of the case...
...and Tom Harkin (D-Iowa) firmly into the Clinton camp...
...says it was the fine distinctions in the early stages of the speech that convinced him there was more than one way of looking at the argument, particularly Bumpers's allusive opening: "Ah been widdat guy atta hunnert American Legion hoedowns," Bumpers began...
...Blayrsted all overa place an' Bob Dole still walks with a gimp...
...And King Hussein loves the guy...
...In an oratorical flurry hailed by jurist Jeb Frozen as the most Ciceronian Senate moment since Patty Murray's amendments to the Family and Medical Leave Act, Bumpers continued, "Lemme, em . . . wherinna hail's ma macrophone at...
...Leper, as he's leav-in' a room, he says, 'You can keep the tip.' Post hoc ergo propter hoc...
...De minimus no curat lex...
...Patrick Leahy (D-Vt...
Vol. 4 • February 1999 • No. 19
