Parody

...For example, a future series will explore the wave of disloyalty that now sweeps the nation’s capital...

...It is for that high purpose that I come to work every morning— that and trying to see how many Charlie Peters prot?g?s I can squeeze into a single magazine...

...Dick Morris serves the president of the United States, yet feels free to cast aspersions behind his back...

...My first cover story— “Popgun Politics: Both candidates are laying claim to the crime issue, and neither is playing it straight”— reveals the astonishing fact that our political parties put a partisan spin on their presentation of issues like crime...

...As more of my issues come out (in the future they shall be known as encyclicals), we shall also strive to lay bear the vices that plague this nation...

...Thus it is with this issue that we change our focus from “News You Can Use” to “Human Imperfections and How to Eliminate Them...

...For journalism is a public profession, and there is no difference between those of us who are called into journalism and those of you who read it, except that we are much more righteous than you would ever dare to be...

...And slowly will I also seek to purge the magazine of advertisements...

...Yet we in the high calling of journalism can strive to advance social uplift only if we at the same time talk obsessively about getting our own house in order...

...James Fallows...

...For if journalists are wrong to take money from speaking to industry groups, surely magazines are wrong to accept advertising from same...

...News & World Report, ready to lead a talented, yet shrinking, staff to a new modality, which I like to call “The Journalism of Conscience...

...As it sayeth on my screen-saver program: “Cast Not The First Stone If Your Own Navel Hath Gone Ungazed...

...And we brilliantly succeed in that story in doing what we shall always strive to do—cut through the half-perspectives of left and right and replace them with our own half-perspectives, as derived from the conventional wisdom of the current moment...

...And already I have excommunicated from this magazine those journalists who have profited from the lecture circuit, and I will continue to cleanse the staff of those caught up in worldly temptations—except in the case of mega-buckraker David Gergen, whom Mort Zuckerman really likes...

...Through all this, I shall depend on readers to contribute their own perspectives...

...26-27...

...As soon as my reporters find out who that blackguard is, rest assured we shall rip him a new one...

...My sources tell me that this disgusting pattern of disloyalty started with a certain former speechwriter for Jimmy Carter who quit and wrote a tell-all in the Atlantic...

...White House officials leave the administration and write scathing expos?s of their former bosses...

...5-6), alcohol poisoners like Absolut Vodka (back cover) and military fatcats like Lockheed Martin (pp...

...For how can we practice “The Journalism of Conscience” if our pages are a sewer of advertisements from tobacco killers like Merit Cigarettes (pp...

...So it is with a sense of austere yet bland high-mindedness that this week I assume the office of Archbishop of U.S...

...Parody CROSSTALK The Sayings of Archbishop James When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one journalist to rescue, by force of sheer moral surety, the nation’s capital from the ethical morass of its own making, it is usually I, James Fallows, who is called in to do the job...