JOYCELYN ELDERS STRIKES A NERVEMAG
Joycfiyn Elders Strtkfs a Nfrvfmag In the nether-precincts of the Internet, Joycelyn Elders— hired by Bill Clinton for her candor, then fired by him for candidly suggesting that schoolchildren be...
...Bowles May Stay Don't count Erskine Bowles out as White House chief of staff yet...
...But don't bother NOW with rational responses...
...Bowles, says a senior White House aide, is bound to be excited by the challenge of making sweeping Social Security and Medicare reform a part of Clinton's legacy, and the president plans to take up this issue in the fall...
...JackinWorld is the self-described "ultimate masturbation resource...
...The restaurant event raised more than $100,000, which will cover an additional 90-plus scholarships this fall...
...It's very tempting, I suppose, for people of weak character to be co-opted by the majority that can use them...
...NOW's statement, they said facetiously, convinced them to abandon their excessive concern for "post-birth fetuses" in favor of the real victims: abused sperm...
...If not on the Supreme Court of the United States, then some other way...
...Kaufman and Mayersohn, by the way, are both pro-choice...
...Her maiden essay, "The Dreaded 'M' Word," is a thousand-word hymn to the "universal sexual practice of self-pleasure...
...They appealed for survivors of sperm abuse to come forward and tell their stories...
...Dad asked the little girl what she'd done during the day...
...The appointment was greeted with near-universal approval, for Franklin is one of the most lionized historians in the country...
...What Armey did was ask his own donors to give money to the fund at an event he headlined on June 26...
...He's been telling everyone he wants to return to North Carolina and his investment-banking business...
...And they promised to make state law conform with NOW's view that "post-birth fetuses, beaten to death by drug abusing parents, are not really entitled to any protection...
...So many people have a price, and it's not unusual, it's not surprising...
...I suspect they may be Judases of a kind . . . betrayers . . . opportunists, immoral opportunists...
...Joycfiyn Elders Strtkfs a Nfrvfmag In the nether-precincts of the Internet, Joycelyn Elders— hired by Bill Clinton for her candor, then fired by him for candidly suggesting that schoolchildren be taught the joys of onanism—is a great heroine...
...Post-birth Idiots In a throwback to the grandly loony feminism of the 1970s, the New York state branch of the National Organization for Women is denouncing what it brands the "Crim-inalization of Pregnancy" act...
...Surgeon General Dr...
...And by troubling his own donors to give additional money to a good cause, he did something most politicians never do: He asked his donors to do something for others rather than give money to him...
...Franklin deserves more skeptical scrutiny, and he got it last week from the editors of the Daily Oklahoman, in the scholar's home state...
...Want to see...
...But the overriding moral is: "It is never okay to shame children for natural inquisitiveness or behavior...
...Armey sought no publicity for his efforts...
...It knows a threat to its anti-child dogma when it sees one...
...This state bill—a rational response to the murder of several small children by drug-addicted mothers— would create the presumption that an infant born with drugs in its bloodstream is neglected...
...Under current law, social workers cannot so much as monitor such a baby until further evidence develops that it has been abused...
...If the president is serious about reconciliation—as he constantly claims to be—then maybe he ought to have as the head of his race squad someone who accords those who disagree with him a little more respect than a comparison to the betrayer of Jesus Christ...
...But "hers was prettier," the girl proudly announced...
...They are rewarded in one way or another...
...Two years ago, Clinton awarded him the medal of freedom...
...Franklin's Judas Goat_ When President Clinton created his special commission on race, he turned to Duke University's John Hope Franklin to lead it...
...Both of these, um, self-help manuals, incidentally, were recently accorded full constitutional protection by the Supreme Court's landmark Communications Decency Act decision...
...Elders reports that she has "an enlightened friend" who has wisely "taught her preschool-aged daughter about her anatomy...
...It seemed to the Scrapbook, therefore, that we should praise a genuine good deed when we came across it...
...Budget chief Franklin Raines would have the inside track, but Clinton prefers that Bowles stick around...
...For instance...
...The "hare-brained" bill, NOW says, is unconstitutional because it "repeatedly refers to embryos and fetuses as 'children,'" thus insinuating into state law the dangerous notion of "fetal rights," and because it violates the ban on illegal search and seizure by drawing conclusions about a mother's behavior from an infant's "toxicology reports...
...The fund is able to pay half the tuition for these schools, up to $1,500 a year, partly because it insists that the families, however poor, come up with half the tuition themselves...
...Of course," Elders writes, she told him the truth: "She and mommy looked at their vaginas...
...It includes illustrated "Jackin How-Tos" for boys and girls...
...She now appears in all her glory in Nervemag, a new webzine about sexuality...
...The fund provides scholarships to low-income District of Columbia children to attend the private school of their choice...
...The "JackinWorld" website, for example, is "dedicated to former U.S...
...Then, in the evening, friends came to dinner...
...Besides, the bill is sexist: It is silent about "the genetic effects of paternal drug use and abuse on sperm...
...The deed was done by House majority leader Dick Armey on behalf of the Washington Scholarship Fund, headed by a young activist named Douglas Dewey...
...Just as the founders intended, we're sure...
...Some blacks have a price...
...It "cultivates in us a humble elegance," she says...
...They uncovered an interview he gave recently to a publication of the Oklahoma Foundation for the Humanities...
...It "just may render heavenly contentment in those who dare...
...It's really too bad Elders has already been fired, because it would be a pleasure to see her fired again...
...Sure, there are "privacy" issues raised by this story, the good doctor acknowledges...
...One day, the mother and child looked at themselves in the mirror together...
...Anyway, it turns out Joycelyn Elders admires the Internet as much as the Internet admires her...
...Also, there's no logical successor to Bowles as chief of staff...
...Because "that shame lasts forever...
...Asked about Justice Clarence Thomas, Franklin said, "You always have such people in any group...
...For now...
...It's just tragic when anyone sells themselves out, whether they're black or white or yellow...
...Well done...
...But President Clinton has a way to keep him in Washington: entitlement reform...
...DtckArmfy's Good Deed It's a maxim in Washington that no good deed goes unpunished...
...It's currently helping some 225 kids from families with an average income of $15,000 go to over 60 area schools...
...Compliments to the bill's sponsors, assembly members Stephen Kaufman and Nettie Mayersohn, who met this challenge with the respect it deserved: They announced their conversion...
Vol. 2 • July 1997 • No. 43
