Elton John, mullahs, Mickey Mouse, etc.
Sir Elton's Candle Power There are many guilty pleasures in the life of The Scrapbook, and not the least of these is celebrity tantrums. This is not because such spectacles prove that celebrities...
...Not that there's anything wrong with that...
...there was plenty of smoke, maybe even some fire...
...Which suggests that the high heels were sort of . . . ancillary to the whole escaping-certain-death-or-imprisonment thing...
...High heels would seem to make walking more difficult, not to mention escaping a besieged mosque while eluding the armed forces of a military government...
...And what about Tina Shelton, who worked as an analyst at the Defense Intelligence Agency from 1984 through 2006...
...The Scrapbook regrets to report that, after the concert, when Sir Elton and his entourage climbed into his limousine for the grueling 200-yard trek to his dressing room and a backstage reception, the princes William and Harry were expected momentarily, security was tightened, and a policeman stopped the limo and advised its occupants to walk to the party...
...Which further suggests that Aziz kinda wanted to, um, wear women's shoes...
...And what about, as Shelton now points out, his old boss George Tenet...
...Connoisseurs of kitsch will recall that at Diana's Westminster Abbey funeral, ten years ago this summer, Sir Elton was chosen to play and sing an adaptation of "Candle in the Wind," his musical tribute to royalty of another sort, Marilyn Monroe...
...But Shelton points out something first reported four years ago by Jeffrey Goldberg in the New Yorker: There was a split on the issue inside the CIA...
...Zarqawi...
...and the Egyptian Islamic Jihad operatives in Baghdad...
...Pakistani soldiers apprehended the rotund Aziz when they noticed that one burqa-clad woman leaving the Red Mosque was much larger than the others...
...the arrests in Europe...
...He wrote: "There was more than enough evidence to give us real concern about Iraq and al Qaeda...
...In Farfour's show Tomorrow's Pioneers, a Palestinian knockoff of Sesame Street, the rodent preached jihad before audiences of children, advocating death to Israel and the murder of Jews...
...At last, the great man emerged from his limo and walked the remaining 50 yards to his dressing room (in the words of the Evening Standard) "stomp[ing] down the road and shouting at people to 'get out of my way.'" In Sir Elton's defense, as one of his entourage explained, it had been a long day "and sound difficulties meant his finale was delayed and 'Crocodile Rock' had to be cut off the end, which he wasn't happy about...
...The head of those skeptical regional analysts was Paul Pillar, believed by many Bush officials to be the source of numerous anonymous quotes from "senior intelligence officials" trashing Bush policy...
...There was no a priori reason for reporters to defer to the regional experts words were exchanged, and Sir Elton instructed his chauffeur to drive around the policeman, who was obliged to threaten Sir Elton with arrest...
...If you get your news from the New York Times or the Washington Post, you probably think intelligence professionals were virtually unanimous in their skepticism about a relationship between Iraq and al Qaeda...
...At this point, according to the London Evening Standard, Sir Elton erupted into one of the "rages for which he is renowned," and addressed the policeman in the following words: Get out of my ****ing way...
...the murder of American USAID officer Lawrence Foley, in Amman, at the hands of Zarqawi's associates...
...Gaza Mickey, R.I.P The Hamas-affiliated executives at Gaza City-based Al Aqsa TV have decided to kill off Farfour, a man in a rodent costume resembling Mickey Mouse who was one of the network's most beloved creative properties...
...La Cage aux Mullahs In fashion news, Pakistani army units last week captured Abdul Aziz, leader of a radical Islamist militia currently holed up inside the Red Mosque in Islamabad, when Aziz tried to sneak through a security cordon wearing a burqa, the head-to-toe women's covering favored by Islamic fundamentalists worldwide...
...Really...
...Washington Post, July 3, 2007...
...In his recent memoir, Tenet reiterated many of the substantive findings of that memo, at one point listing them: "Ansar al-Islam...
...Supply and Demand buja, Nigeria—The price of machetes has dropped by half in parts of Nigeria since the end of general elections in April because demand from thugs sponsored by politicians has subsided, the state-owned News Agency of Nigeria reported...
...Now, The Scrapbook has heard before of jihadists disguising themselves in women's clothing in order to elude capture or death...
...So, presumably, may Sir Elton be forgiven his contemptuous treatment of a wage-earning bobby, his indifference to the safety of Princess Diana's surviving sons, and his elephant-sized sense of entitlement...
...I've been working all ****ing day and I need to get to my ****ing dressing room...
...That may be why journalists hold Pillar in high regard...
...Afterward, "Sara," one of the show's teenage hosts, told the audience that "Farfour was martyred while defending his land...
...True to form, Farfour's writers decided they'd off the mouse in a sickening fashion...
...What about his colleagues at the CTC...
...What we couldn't help noticing, however, was that Aziz wasn't wearing just a burqa...
...No word on whether his civil partner, Lady John (the former David Furnish), was also in the limousine...
...But, alas...
...So it was right and proper that Pillar of the (Intel) Community In the June 30 Washington Post, Tina Shelton took on former CIA director George Tenet...
...Hmm...
...As Shelton pointed out, Tenet criticized the authors of the memo the organizers of the Concert for Diana should invite Sir Elton to repeat his performance at its grand finale last week...
...A high-quality machete sells for $3, compared with $6 before the elections...
...rather than the counterterrorism experts, but most did...
...This is not because such spectacles prove that celebrities are just like us, but because they prove that celebrities—not all, of course, but many—are not like us in the least, and demonstrate this fact of life on a regular basis...
...Kurmal...
...Analysts at the CIA's coun-terterrorism center (CTC) believed "the reporting that suggested a deeper relationship" between Iraq and al Qaeda was "credible...
...There was a brief standoff, more but embraced its most important conclusion...
...Shelton was one of the authors of the much-discussed "Feith Memo," a Pentagon analysis of the many ties between Iraq and al Qaeda (sent to the Senate Intelligence Committee in October 2003 by former undersecretary of defense for policy Douglas J. Feith...
...Farfour refused, and the "Israeli officer" subsequently beat him to death on screen...
...Ghastly stuff...
...When the soldiers removed the head covering—exposing Aziz's bearded visage—they knew they had their man...
...Don't you know who I am...
...Case in point: The recent "Concert for Diana" at London's Wembley Stadium, attended by umpteen thousand people, broadcast live to untold millions across the globe, and featuring the late princess's two sons, William and Harry, and a musical performance by (among others) Sir Elton John...
...According to AP, he was also wearing high heels...
...In a Foreign Affairs article last year, Pillar wrote: "The intelligence community never offered any analysis that supported the notion of an alliance between Saddam and al Qaeda...
...You can't make this stuff up...
...Columnist Bob Novak reported non-anonymous sniping by Pillar shortly before the 2004 election to an audience in California...
...According to media reports, during the show's final segment, an "Israeli officer" showed up and demanded to buy Farfour's nest...
...Tenet acknowledges this in his book...
...Analysts at the CIA's Near East/South Asia (NESA) desk did not...
Vol. 12 • July 2007 • No. 41
