The Army Goes on Spring Break
Nielsen, Kirk
The Army Goes on Spring Break By Kirk Nielsen Illustration by Tomer Hanuka Spring Break, Panama City Beach, and the Army is there to entice half-naked eighteen- to twenty-four-year-olds to look...
...They fall silent as two U.S...
...It rises in a corner of a vast expanse of asphalt that provides several thousand parking spaces for Club La Vela and Spinnaker, two sprawling, rustic beachside drinking and dancing establishments that spring breakers pack into by night...
...Crouch and Swanson report no intention of joining the Army, National Guard, or any military service...
...We jump at events like spring break, football games, or high schools to recruit for the Army as well as to talk to the people out there and let 'em know that, you know, we're ARMY STRONG...
...a short, blond young woman shouts to me from behind one of the Army National Guard tables...
...It's about 1 p.m., and a rock band reminiscent of the Red Hot Chili Peppers has just started to crank on the National Guard stage...
...You either go or you don't go...
...You have people who will join...
...There is a stack of straw ranger-style hats with bands that say "National Guard" on the table in front of her...
...Army promotional air balloon adjacent to the tower lies deflated...
...They'll walk around with a huge T-shirt that says 'I'm a Idiot' if you give it to 'em...
...The group watches a video featuring animated maps and diagrams that detail their mission: pulling security for a Special Forces operation to seize a key Al Qaeda lieutenant who is the mastermind of embassy and civilian bombings in several countries...
...This is just one part of what we do...
...A lot of people don't support the war...
...Nowadays, the panhandle region is a bastion of flag-waving patriotism and devotion to federal military power...
...troops in Iraq have had extreme difficulty distinguishing between insurgents and civilians, and that the United States might be unable to stabilize Iraq without committing slaughter, are met with sheepish shrugs and blank looks...
...Army soldiers in fatigues inform them that three Humvees fitted with M-249 semiautomatic weapons like the ones used in Iraq await them in the darkness of the dome...
...He said it's my choice, but right now he would wait...
...Sergeant First Class Paul Sachs, a lanky thirty-five-year-old New Jersey native with a rapid-fire, monotone delivery, reports that the recruitment effort this year, as compared to last year, is going well...
...Army logo-white five-point star with black and gold trim on a black background above the words "ARMY STRONG"-plastered around pillars in the cul-de-sac and on exterior walls beside the main entrance...
...They give their names, addresses, and dates of birth to individuals behind the computers...
...Me, I've been blessed...
...This just shows people that, you know, this is still a great Army, no matter what...
...It's just the quickest way to make money," he confesses...
...should withdraw from Iraq is less certain...
...Nearby, breakers are dancing to loud pop music emanating from the U.S...
...Swanson: "God bless him...
...Kid from my hometown, dude...
...Jet thunder from aircraft stationed at nearby Tyndall AFB and Eglin AFB is more common than natural thunder...
...Inside, the reception desks display "GOARMY.COM" banners...
...The Pentagon has sunk $10 million into the high-tech project, which the Army also deploys at NASCAR races, air shows, and festivals across the country...
...But he's not thinking of enlisting...
...He opens the cooler, revealing an empty bottle of Captain Morgan's rum...
...Swanson: "If I had a shit-ton of money I would donate it all to the soldiers...
...I mean, if all the terrorists were over here we wouldn't be on the beach right now...
...Crouch: "I love buffets...
...Like, what is the ultimate goal...
...I inform them that a guy named Kenny is thinking of joining the National Guard to get the $20,000 signing bonus...
...And we take pride in ourselves and our country...
...But now, he says, they're using the National Guard to go overseas to fight in the war...
...After dialoguing for several more minutes, Swanson offers: "Even though we have disagreeing opinions, isn't it beautiful that we live in a country where we can have a civilized conversation like we just did...
...Andrews Bay Skirmish historic site, in which Confederate rebels shot and killed six Union soldiers attempting a beach landing by small watercraft in March of 1863...
...Dude, we are so wasted," Swanson advises...
...Linda is unaware whether enlistment by college kids has declined as a result of Iraq War complications...
...The room is filled with chatter and the smell of beer breath...
...They range from $2,000 to $40,000, depending on the job," she says...
...They support the military in every single way...
...Because I'm kind of tipsy...
...I don't know...
...Ten men in identical black shorts and shirts are enjoying a photo-op with sexy female spring breakers in bikinis...
...Kenny keeps thinking about the money, though...
...He says he opposes the war, but that hasn't stopped him from loading up on free Army gear...
...Not far away, I encounter two nineteen-year-olds, Ellen Martinez of Houston and Justine Watson of Charlotte, North Carolina, sitting on towels and reading celebrity magazines...
...We just started our season, but from the people we're talking to, the patriotism out there is awesome," he says...
...Because I mean, you know, look at what's going on right now...
...My dad was in the Marines when he was younger," he explains...
...Crouch [to Swanson]: "Then you get fucked over, dude...
...Whoa," she replies...
...Gets fucked over...
...They pay for your college tuition...
...A while later, I approach the Holiday Inn SunSpree Resort and notice the large banners with official U.S...
...Each answers a question regarding his personal interests, such as athletics and adventure, then poses for a head shot, which is quickly printed onto a Virtual Army Experience ID card, to be hung from their necks...
...And if people want to know about it we tell them our story...
...Kirk Nielsen is a writer based in Miami Beach...
...Make me an offer," I say...
...I ask him what it's like to parachute into Iraq...
...troops in Iraq, many on their second and third tours since the war began, and the Bush Administration deploying tens of thousands of additional soldiers to try to stabilize the civil war, the Pentagon needs more than a few good young men and women to help relieve war-weary shell-shocked veterans who deserve a nice long break of their own...
...That's just like me saying, 'OK, you walk outside this door, you're going to get hit by a car.' So I'm predicting something...
...I meet a forty-five-year-old schoolteacher and self-described "rightwing Republican," who moonlights as an oyster shucker three nights a week to help pay for his son's new motorbike...
...Can you put my final words as, 'I love this fucking'-er, minus the-'I love this country...
...Everybody uses a fake name and a fake phone number just so they can get a free towel...
...The multimillion-dollar mission, designed with the help of McCann Erickson, the New York City-based advertising agency, employs aerial performances, obstacle courses, life-size virtual reality combat, state-of-the-art graphics, and free T-shirts and towels...
...Army recruiter named Linda (who declined to reveal her last name...
...Army Spring Break 2007 T-shirts and towels is depleted...
...With approximately 150,000 U.S...
...I basically have the next three years of my life mapped out...
...Initial contract periods range from fifteen months to six years...
...I have a friend who got a chick knocked up in Iraq...
...He has ruled out enlistment...
...You want a hat...
...Suggestions that U.S...
...Crouch: "Dude, I can hook you up with soldiers, man...
...It's closed for the day...
...But today, even some ultraconservatives in this corner of the South are fed up with the war in Iraq...
...The Virtual Army Experience structure is a gray, pressure-inflated dome resembling an airplane hangar with a convex roof...
...But the thing you have to sacrifice is you have to work one weekend out of the month...
...Linda, who has avoided deployment overseas during her seventeen-year career in the Army says she tells potential recruits they would have a "50-50 chance" of going to Iraq...
...I mean, I love President Bush," he says...
...Kenny offers me a can of Natural beer, and waves over his friend Jack, a short, eighteen-year-old freshman at West Point, who was stretched out on a beach towel...
...On the beach stands the ARMY STRONG climbing tower, consisting of a fifty-foot-tall teepee-like formation of thirty logs cut in various lengths...
...But the way I see it, the war's almost over," he says...
...After graduating, he plans to get an MBA and try to start his own company...
...This is my second T-shirt of the day," he says...
...In between cans of beer, he's been thinking about enlisting in the Guard...
...The Panama City area is home to the St...
...Swanson believes he can better serve his country by starting his own Silicon Valley company, but wants it known he totally supports the military...
...They put it down...
...And it's pretty awesome...
...You know what I mean...
...One way or the other...
...Watson adds, "I don't see, like, a clear end...
...Like Johnny Clayburg, man...
...I identify a bona fide female U.S...
...Nobody really wants to go to college...
...It doesn't seem like it's going very well at all," says Martinez, who has resided in Dubai and Damascus because her father is in the oil business...
...Asked whether the troops should come home, he says, "I'm not the biggest fan of Bush, but I think that right now we should probably just leave them there, because what they're doing is good...
...And we have to get something to eat...
...They are freshmen television and film majors at New York University...
...We don't know if they're going...
...They are packing up clipboards and brochures and advising spring breakers that the day's supply of U.S...
...He told me the National Guard was meant for when the rest of the military is deployed overseas and the National Guard will step in and help police the streets and everything like that...
...I can't do that...
...And that's basically all you can say" she hedges...
...We tell 'em about the different jobs in the Army and their enthusiasm towards the Army is always high, it's always great...
...Army Spring Break stage, adjacent to which a group of young males is battling intensively on an ARMY STRONG basketball court erected on the sand...
...The National Guard...
...I want to fly helicopters, and I just want to try to, you know, do my part and stop the terrorism that's going on...
...I love this country...
...It's all about loving your country and shit like that," Jack says of his potential deployment to Iraq...
...So I let them know, you have a 50-50 chance...
...See what I'm saying...
...Army Spring Break 2007 T-shirts, tank tops, and towels remains strong but not necessarily enthusiasm for enlistment...
...Are you writing a book...
...I think I have five towels up in the room...
...I have a chair...
...I guess if we left right now everything would have been for nothing, I don't know...
...She wants to know if I have a college degree, then informs me about signing bonuses...
...A gold and black U.S...
...Nearby, I query Craig Luzik, a twenty-year-old from Pittsburgh who is majoring in electrical engineering at Purdue University...
...So it's hard to say when it could end...
...And I would never do that to anybody...
...They got a $20,000 signing bonus," Kenny says...
...Each is definitely not considering military service, though their sense of whether the U.S...
...It is difficult to find such clarity amid the spring breakers on Panama City Beach, or even paranoia about a future military draft, even though these energetic, athletic men and women are of prime combat age...
...I don't really support the war...
...Like, who do we have to capture...
...I ask him whether the deteriorating war situation in Iraq has affected enthusiasm at recruiting events...
...Then they have, like, an $849 check that comes in every month...
...I don't know if I'm ready to commit that much time," he says...
...A group of about ten, mostly male, spring breakers fresh from beach partying have clanged up a set of metal stairs and into a cargo container secured along the southern wall of the dome structure...
...What would be the definition of us winning this war...
...If you sign up, I can't tell you you're really going...
...But right now my ass is broke...
...The Army Goes on Spring Break By Kirk Nielsen Illustration by Tomer Hanuka Spring Break, Panama City Beach, and the Army is there to entice half-naked eighteen- to twenty-four-year-olds to look up from their beer guzzling, beanbag tossing, and football throwing for a moment and contemplate a thrilling tour of duty or two in a military uniform...
...I guess it wasn't for me," he says...
...They are the Golden Knights, an army parachute unit, and have literally just dropped in...
...Inside they find a reception counter with several computer terminals...
...a fighter jet on a pedestal graces the entrance of Gulf Coast Community College...
...He has doubts, though...
...We're a nondeployable unit," he replies...
...It's Kenny, a nineteen-year-old freshman at the University of Louisville...
...In the meantime he'd be safe in college, with the 20-large, plus almost another grand per month...
...Coming up where I live, we don't really have too much money...
...They pass through a blue curtain into a dark narrow room with about five video screens spaced evenly on one wall just above eye level...
...Like, it's never as much as you think you're getting, you know...
...I shake my head and find a spot on the sand to sit down and assess the situation...
...And this seems like a quicker way to make money...
...They identify themselves as lifelong buddies: Matt Swanson, a twenty-two-year-old computer engineering major at Iowa State University, and Seth Crouch, a twenty-three-year-old health care systems major at the University of Iowa...
...You a recruiter...
...Activity here centers around the Surf Shack Internet lounge, a small roofless tiki hut where several spring breakers access eight computer terminals, courtesy of Gillette Venus Breeze...
...Tony Cummings is a twenty-year-old sophomore and pre-physical therapy major at Western Kentucky University...
...A lot of kids are still excited when we jump in...
...And I haven't signed up with a real name once...
...Other pillars are wrapped with the smooth female legs of the Gillette Venus Breeze women's razors purple-hued print campaign...
...I return to the climbing tower area and encounter two males in white T shirts and swimming trunks transporting a cooler across the sand away from shore...
...I was gung-ho about the war at first...
...But now I think it's time to bring the troops home...
...Just before a soldier leads the spring breaker squad to a door in the dome, a petite young woman in shorts and tank top leans against her tall male companion and asks, "Are we going to get shot...
...People just see the bad things, but right now we're just showing people we're walking strong and despite what is happening we continue our mission...
...Kyle Herman, a twenty-one-year-old mechanical engineering student at the University of Minnesota, possesses an ARMY STRONG beach chair, which he received after scaling the climbing tower...
...Next to the tower perimeter, on the sand in front of the Holiday Inn SunSpree, a black vinyl canopy shelters several long rectangular folding tables manned by plainclothes men and women in black T-shirts and ranger-style hats featuring the words "U.S...
...The next day, at the Army's Holiday Inn beachfront site, demand for U.S...
...a big, beefy, sunburned male wearing large square faux diamond earrings yells to me...
Vol. 71 • June 2007 • No. 6
