SMALL FAVORS
Ivins, Molly
SMALL FAVORS Molly Ivins Partying with the Animals Y'all would have loved the Republican Convention: I'm so sorry you couldn't be there. Great parties. Phyllis Schlafly, the most serious case of...
...Ollie North is being defended by the ACLU: so what...
...In 1960, women favored Richard Nixon over Kennedy by 54 to 46 per cent, which proves we don't vote romance, no matter what our other failures of judgment...
...If you want proof that making loud hawkish noises and engaging in great jingoistic jangling is no indication that a person is actually prepared to make sacrifices for this country, just take a look at Dan Quayle...
...Phyllis Schlafly, the most serious case of Episcopal thighs in America, gave a theme party at the New Orleans Museum of Art— "Laissez les bon temps roulez...
...STEPHEN KRONINGER The entire tenor of the Bush campaign is astonishingly dated...
...Boogie 'til you puke, Jeane," I yelled at Kirkpatriek, but she didn't pay me any mind...
...He is married to one wife and he has a gorgeous family...
...Even without the Vietnam controversy, Quayle is a reactionary light-weight, so that makes not one but two white, millionaire golfing Dekes running on the Republican ticket...
...Who do the Republicans think is scared by the ACLU any more...
...She could have said, "Let them eat crawfish etouffee and chocolate-covered strawberries...
...It's hard to know what more any woman could want...
...The fact that Michael Dukakis has been blowing all this promising material is not their fault...
...Why, said Heston, "If John Kennedy had been alive today he might be here too, because he was a member of the NRA...
...he's in the bush with Bush...
...The oaths, the pledges, the swearing hand-over-heart—all that was the work of Joe McCarthy and Roy Cohn, as though signing a loyalty oath made one loyal...
...The flap over the Pledge of Allegiance is another Richard Nixon leftover...
...When they announce something like, "And the door prize will be breakfast with Ollie Molly Ivins, a columnist for the Dallas Times Herald, appears in this space every month...
...There she was, receiving her guests at the top of a marble staircase, artfully posed before a full-length portrait of Marie Antoinette...
...Quayle...
...Having them all in New Orleans was too much-thousands of earnest human beings, all wearing yellow "power" ties and saying, "We've got to huddle with John on this," plunked down in the middle of a city full of people who just escaped from Diane Ar-bus photographs...
...The National Rifle Association threw a little shindig in honor of Senator Phil Gramm of Texas and Arnold Schwarzenegger...
...To run against the American Civil Liberties Union at this late hour reflects political thinking that hasn't budged in thirty years...
...It's hard to know what more any woman could want...
...Charlton Heston emceed the affair and said the press had asked Schwarzenegger why he, an in-law of the Kennedy clan, would attend an NRA do...
...There were lots of party animals at Phyllis's do...
...If you were really mean, you could go out to Bourbon Street at 2 a.m...
...just for fun and watch them throw up in the gutters...
...Instead she said, "George Bush has a lovely family...
...The touching Republican faith that J. Danforth Quayle III would resolve George Bush's gender-gap problem because Quayle bears this stunning resemblance to Princess Diana of Great Britain (interestingly enough, Mrs...
...Governor Bill Clements of Texas said of the Veep selection, "Certainly Texas is probably the greatest quail-hunting area in the United States, so we can relate to Mr...
...I went to speak at the annual dinner of the Mississippi ACLU in May, and the event was listed in the Jackson Clarion-Ledger as a "Best Bet for Entertainment This Weekend...
...It's like that at Republican Conventions—just rip and read, right off the ticker...
...Quayle is...
...Dwight Eisenhower was a "card-carrying member" of the ACLU: so what...
...North," you're not even surprised...
...And it is hard to know...
...If Dukakis hasn't got enough sense to take that Pledge of Allegiance issue and run it right up George Bush's ass, he doesn't deserve to be President...
...Quayle looks exactly like Prince Philip) seems to be based on precious little evidence...
...That's where Mr...
...The right-wingers got control of the platform committee and wrote a huge pile of crap George Bush will have to run from all fall...
...Well, the GOP did its best for the Democratic ticket...
...Listening to Republicans bloviate for hours on end probably softens the brain...
...You find them in the bush...
...It's not about loyalty, it's about loyaltyism, the claptrap public parading of patriotism...
...The whole point of the organization is that it stands up for the liberties of everyone...
...Not that the rest of us deserve George Bush, but there it is...
Vol. 52 • October 1988 • No. 10
