The Importance of Trivia
Serwer, Arnold
The Importance of Trivia by ARNOLD SERWER One morning my friend John brightened my day by giving me a clipping from the letters-to-the-editor column of a Chicago newspaper. The letter read: Dear...
...In fact, I would like to believe he has begun a deliberate campaign to call attention to the value of trivia which, when you come to think of it, keep us occupied much of the day and refresh us for grappling with earthshaking problems from time to time...
...But he goes on to raise the specter of inflation...
...A barrage of letters in the Culp vein would be highly therapeutic for the public's many anxieties...
...I plan to paddle only at night in the moonlight...
...Among the weighty letters in that column on most days— as in the letters departments of most newspapers and magazines—are dissertations on the war in Vietnam, the causes of inflation, the population explosion, nuclear proliferation, the God Is Dead debate, student dissent versus student apathy, and other subjects of great moment...
...Elmo Fordyce The image would be entirely pleasing if Elmo had merely given us the news that his once dirty Pontiac now sparkles...
...That "Obs" after her husband's name doesn't stand for "Observer...
...Well, I am new at this sort of writing...
...If ever there was a classic "life-must-go-on" note, this is it...
...Maybe his breakfast bulletin should omit his judgment on cornflakes...
...They did a good job, but it cost two bucks...
...And surely the Indianapolis Star would be interested in printing this charming note from an Indianapolis housewife: Beginning next July 1 my husband and I will be on a two-weeks canoe trip down the Wabash...
...Malone a guitar to play while Molly Malone is paddling her canoe through straits broad and narrow, a-live, a-live-O...
...That's not very soothing...
...Foster...
...Funny thing, the new one sweeps cleaner...
...In these days of over-staged and overplayed news announcements, when the most casual comment of VIPs is blown up into gigantic headlines, what a wonderful surprise it would be to read in the vox populi column of your morning newspaper this bubbling comment: Dear Editor: You'll never guess who called me today...
...Morton Culp John and I have instructed our goldsmith to strike off a medal and send it to Mr...
...It will make thousands of female readers feel the warm little glow of pleasure that the thought of a baby evokes in a woman, especially the woman not about to have one...
...Let's not mail Elmo's letter...
...How about this one for the Washington Post: My wife is in her ninth month...
...Luke Foster, Obs...
...The letter read: Dear Editor: Just thought you would like to know I finally got my storm windows up last week...
...Tillie Copernicus My forecast is that the Dow-Jones combined list of stocks will go up two points after The Wall Street Journal publishes her communique from the consumer front...
...It stands for "Obstetrician...
...Culp deserves a medal, for he is telling all of us that in spite of everything life goes on, trite as that sounds...
...Byron Hasenblad On second thought the Hasenblad letter may be too opinionated to have the optimum soothing effect on Times readers...
...But the Star probably won't, and the Malones will be lucky if the circulation manager even remembers to tell the newsboy to stop their paper on July 1. If enough rank-and-file citizens get their letters published maybe the idea will catch on with the VIPs...
...They were great...
...Into this raging Great Sea of Controversy, Morton Culp calmly launched his tiny chip of information: His storm windows are up...
...The least the Star could do in return would be to send Mr...
...Lyndon B. Johnson...
...Note that Culp avoided saying that putting up storm windows was "great...
...Maybe this next letter to the editor strikes too much of a carping note to be acceptable for the campaign: Had the car laundry wash my Pon-tiac yesterday...
...A month ago it cost $1.75...
...Molly Malone It has the sound of poetry, an idyl to tranquilize the jangled nerves of readers throughout the whole circulation area...
...And don't worry about Mrs...
...He is insisting that a small event in his existence is so important it merits attention in a Chicago newspaper...
...Mrs...
...Therefore I have drafted a number of sample missives to be used in this worthy campaign...
...In contrast the next missive emphasizes positive thinking, to wit: I got tired of my old broom so I went out and bought a new one last Thursday...
...Culp...
...Ho Chi Minh...
...Imagine the following which might appear in The New York Times: Monday morning I had cornflakes for breakfast...
...If he is engaging in a millipede exercise, pulling the legs of thousands of people, including me, that's even better...
...Mrs...
Vol. 31 • February 1967 • No. 2
