'Tis the Season to be Married

...And that drawn-out running scene through the streets of New York' I realize the production company went to great expense, sending a crew of Californians to film the location shots Yet it is patronizing to New Yorkers to suggest that not a single good Samaritan would stop and offer Rhoda a ride Even if it was only someone who wanted to rape her Most people, over the last two months, have been waiting around for Mary and Lou and Murray and Phyllis and Georgette to show up on Rhoda Now that the big event has finally occurred, the critics are going to start getting angry if the series doesn't get moving again One means would be a prompt divorce for failure to consummate...

...On Television 'TIS THE SEASON TO BE MARRIED BY MARVIN KITMAN Corporal Klinger of the 4077th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital unit in Korea married Laverne Esposito of Toledo, Ohio, on the M*A*S*H episode (CBS, Tuesday, 8 30 p m ) of October 15 The groom wore white It was the first marriage for each To Corporal Klinger, who is also from Toledo, the wedding was a dream come true The former Miss Esposito was his hometown sweetheart The groom, who is reportedly in his late 20s but is eternally young, earned a bouquet of wild flowers His veil, tiara and full-length white dress were ordered through the mail As a member of the weddmg party explained, "Where would he get a 42-long in Korea...

...The reason Corporal Klinger has been able to continue serving his country in a dress is that he is clearly sane He sports fancier clothes than the average GI, the psychiatrist concluded, because he would like to be sent home He doesn't want to be killed in a war even the well-educated doctors (Captains Hawk-eye and Trapper John) have called "meaningless " Not wishing to be killed is a sign of a rational mind Ipso facto, Corporal Klinger cannot receive a discharge on psychological grounds Students of craziness may notice a slight resemblance between Klinger and Captain Yossanan, the bombardier in Joseph Heller's Catch-22 Yossanan went around naked to express his antagonism to war The Corporal's dressing up is the TV equivalent of the Captain's dressing down It is a mark of how far television situation comedy has come as an art that the networks are now stealing ideas from a great work of literature instead of from My Three Sons or Lucy Not since Phil Silvers as Sergeant Bilko arranged to have a monkey inducted into the 69th Infantry Division at Fort Dix in 1953 has there been such a meaningful cast-member m a military sitcom The message in the Bilko show escapes me But the message of Corporal Khnger is that the Korean War was fought not only to make the world safe for democracy but for the right of a man to dress like a woman Corporal Klinger has received no decorations or awards in his two seasons at the front Neither has Jamie Fan-, the actor who plays the difficult role There was talk last year that he would be nominated for an Emmy as the best supporting actress Or the best male m a female role Or the best-dressed actress—Farr makes Geraldine Jones look frumpy by comparison Some observers felt the National Academy of Television Arts and Sciences should have established still another Emmy award, a category open to both sexes Singer David Bowie reportedly won a prize in England not long ago for being the third best male voice and the first best female voice As far as the arts are concerned, it's an exciting time to be alive But the Academy has largely disregarded Corporal Klinger's presence on M*A"S*H, much as the newspapers and magazines ignored his wedding Obviously, the organization doesn't know how to deal with a GI in drag Is it Jamie Farr's fault that he has such an ambivalent role...

...Father Mulcahy, chaplain of the 4077th, officiated The Mobile Hospital unit was m attendance The vows were taken on an international radio-telephone hook-up arranged by Colonel Henry Blake, commandant of the base, since the bride was in Toledo and the groom was m Korea He had tried to get home for the wedding Very hard The wedding reception took place in Colonel Blake's office Nobody kissed the groom In other social news last month, Rhoda Fay Morgenstern, of Minneapolis and the Bronx, was mar-ned to Joe Gerard of New York on the Rhoda show (CBS, Monday, 9 30 p M ) of October 28 It was a small ceremony, held in the apartment of Mrs and Mr Ida Morgenstern on the Grand Concourse Forty million people attended Both Corporal Klinger and the former Miss Morgenstern are members of minority groups poorly covered by television m the past Rhoda had been the first single Jewish girl in the history of situation comedy She had also been the first unwed heroine who was not a virgin, if you don't count Mary Richards {Maty Tyler Moore, CBS, Saturday, 9 00 p m ) But I'll get into that later In many ways the Klinger affair was more significant than Rhoda's, even though it didn't make the cover of any newsmagazines (I haven't finished checking the underground press) For those of you who haven't kept up with the culture of your times, Corporal Klinger has been working as an orderly in the 4077th M*A'*,S*H unit since it arrived on television in September 1972 He is perhaps the most easily recognized of the hospital personnel When somebody yells "Hey, miss'" at the stretcherbearers, the one in the nurse's uniform who turns around, looking like she needs a shave, is usually Corporal Klinger Often, the Corporal is dressed improperly at the front While on duty recently he was seen wearing a fox scarf over a no-sleeve formal gown His collection of hats, however, is impressive For relaxation during the lulls between battles, Klinger sits under a hair dryer or does his nails He has no hobbies, other than dressing up Prior to his wedding, the Corporal had not been happy m Korea, and had frequently turned to higher authorities for help "All right, honey," the division psychiatrist said to him one day after he reported to the doctor in a stunning organdy gown, "What's your problem...

...What was Mary doing sitting patiently at the reception...

...They also serve who stand around in women's clothing M M y contrast, Valerie Harper, who plays Rhoda, the other minority-group member, will have no trouble winning an Emmy this year You probably recall that Rhoda was the fat little girl from the Bronx who had a troubled childhoodher puberty lasted 17 years and she thought she was the cause of World War II Unmarried, Rhoda went off to Minneapolis, feeling that what she had would keep better in the cold Luckily, she managed to get a flat above Mary Richards, and the two women became close friends Very close For three years neither of them had a boyfriend In the premiere episode of her new series (September 9), based on her life in New York City, Rhoda immediately found a man Thank God People were beginning to talk Mary Tyler Moore was a tough RHODA MORGENSTERN act for Rhoda to follow But for the first few weeks, it turned the trick The show was another good argument for mitosis, a creative process that MTM Enterprises producers James L Brooks and Allen Burns may have picked up in high school biology watching an amoeba split in two Students of TV science, though, give credit for the discovery of mitosis to the Norman Lear-Bud Yorkin lab—where it was first found that All in the Family could be split into Maude, which then could be split into Good Times My biggest fear about the "Daughter of Mary Tyler Moore" before the series began was the character of Rhoda In the original she was the Jewish girl playing off the wasp Mary, making her an exotic Worry wart that I was' Rhoda has proved she can succeed on her own Moreover, it was a masterstroke to give her a boyfriend from the start, one with whom she has an obviously meaningful relationship Usually single TV girls, like Dons Day, are forever on the brink of losing their virginity Then they leave you there, on the brink The creators assume our interest in their sex problems is eternal Rhoda's boyfriend, Joe Gerard, is a solid character Played by David Groh, the soap opera star, he is a tough but sensitive president of a building-wrecking firm It is not clear whether he is Jewish He may be Italian or Greek Nonetheless, he looks Jewish In New York everybody looks Jewish Overnight Rhoda and Joe established themselves as the TV Couple of the Year This title was previously awarded to Arthur and Olive on NBC's Lotsa Luck—after Sonny and Cher split up In addition, the series features Rhoda's mother, Ida Morgenstern (Nancy Walker), one of television's leading mystery women In Mary Tyler Moore, Rhoda was always saying she sent money back to the Bronx to support her poor old mother Yet everybody knew—except Rhoda—that her mother was working as a maid on NBC (for McMillan and Wife), and as a waitress in a dmer (for some paper towel company) Ida Morgenstern ranks among the truly obnoxious people on TV, and I was concerned about how much viewers could take of her week after week without wanting to stuff a roll of paper towels down her throat But, ingeniously, the script-writers are letting her appear no more frequently than she does in the commercials Rhoda's sister, Brenda Fay Morgenstern (Julie Kavner), is potentially a very strong new character She has a mother problem, a weight problem, a date problem In other words, she is what her older sister used to be like betore Rhoda started losing weight on Mary Tyler Moore This is a brilliant twist that used to be called "the splitting image " Brenda Fay (Mrs Morgenstern explained in the opening episode that she always wanted to name a child "Fay") is my nominee for the next mitotic miracle Another natural for a spin-off is Carlton the doorman, even though only his voice (played by producer Lorenzo Music) is a character on the show Every week Carlton can be heard on the intercom butting into another family's problems in the apartment house All of these parts were beautifully cast but naturally needed development, the mark of a great TV series today Unfortunately, after about the third week of Rhoda, everything creative was suspended In the general preoccupation with milking the wedding for all it was worth the meeting of the parents, the lovers' spat and reconciliation, the engagement, shower, etc the characters stopped growing The writers haven't had the time to get Brenda, for example, out of the stereotyped role of the girl who eats too much and has no boyfriends Of course, the wedding did create a great deal of excitement At least one home, on Long Island, held a reception while the show was on the air Cocktail frankfurters, pretzels, and crackers and cheese were served at the smorgasbord The TV set sat below a bank of bookshelves decorated like a chuppah, the flowered awning that, in a Jewish ceremony, symbolizes the bridal chamber As the show was about to begin colored yarmulkas were handed out, and after it ended the guests partook of a meal and a wedding cake that was inscribed "Rhoda & Joe 10/28/74 " It was almost as if there had never been a TV wedding before Entirely overlooked were such blissful moments as the Fred MacMur-ray-Beverly Garland nuptials on My Three Sons, followed by the weddings of a couple of the sons Jackie Cooper marned somebody on Hennessey 10 years ago Even earlier, Shimon Wincelberg won praise for the authentic Hasidic ceremony that climaxed one of the Palladin shows he wrote And who could ever forget the wedding of Jeannie and the astronaut Tony Nelson What a gorgeous bride she made I sighed and cried at that one Rhoda's affair lasted an hour (preempting the Maude show a half-hour before) That was because she was late to her own wedding It may be the sign of a TV critic who has no heart, but after the thrills and emotionalism of the moment passed, I found the ceremony contrived As 40 million of you will recall, Phyllisone of the mishpoeha from Minneapolis who came in for the occasionforgot to pick up Rhoda in Manhattan to drive her to the Mor-gensterns in the Bronx So the bride-to-be rushed into the street to find a taxi Naturally, none was available You can never get a cab in New York when you need one Rhoda then dashed through the streets in her beautiful white dress even more beautiful than Corporal Khnger'suntil she reached a subway station On the train to the Bronx another rider wanted to write graffiti on her dress Meanwhile, we were asked to believe that everybody sat around in the apartment for two or three hours The strength of Mary Tyler Moore is its realism The characters sometimes are almost too real to be funny Thus it is proper to wonder why Rhoda didn't pick up the telephone and call the Morgensterns as soon as she realized Phyllis' booboo Besides, how can we accept her dressing alone on her wedding day, without at least the company of her best friend...