The Spice Box
THE SPICE BOX Jewish foods, as seen by others It's a curious thing. Apparently, every time a Jewish holiday approaches, the merchants treat it as a last supper. San Antonio's Rabbi Morley...
...matzo...
...Any takers...
...How can you blame them...
...OSH stands for occupational safety and health...
...Q.E.D...
...15...
...Holy wedlock...
...Ghag sameach...
...DuPont learns Hebrew— the hard way This is the month for Pennsylvania rabbis...
...Oh boy, do they have the wrong Rebbe...
...Invitation Readers are invited— and encouraged—to submit material for The Spice Box...
...We reserve the right to edit all submissions...
...Please send us ideas, notes, curiosities—anything you'd like to share with our subscribers...
...In August, an American friend on a -visit to Israel tried to reach them one evening at their residence...
...dropped the name after finding out that a similar sounding Hebrew phrase [actually, not a phrase, but a word] means 'I will destroy' " Subscribers Fran and Mike Grossman, of Highland Park, send us a snapshot of their license plate with the following note: "What better way to describe our eight-year old station wagon with which we hate to part...
...San Antonio's Rabbi Morley Peinstein shares with us a supermarket ad headlined, "Happy New Year to All of Our Jewish Friends...
...Well, from Santa Cruz, California, Jack Stein sends us a grocery store ad promoting the following "Rosh Hoshanah and Yom Kippur Specials": gefllte fish (traditional repast), grape wine (okay so far), memorial candles (still reasonable) and...
...In the meantime, be aware that Chanu-kah in 1983 happens on December 1—and, in 1986, on December 27...
...license Rabbi Sidney Greenberg, of Temple Sinai in Dresner, Pa., shares with us yet another in the continuing saga of "only in Israel" stories: "Reena and Bruce Hoffman [Rabbi Greenberg is Reena's father], who recently made aiiyah, purchased a health food store in Jerusalem in June 1982...
...honey or sponge cake...
...Hyperbole Proud grandparents Marcy and Bernie Kozberg of Houston report on grandson Zak's response to part of the recent Jerry Lewis telethon...
...The most recent goof by one of those computerized mail houses is brought to our attention by reader Lawrence Weintraub of Florence, South Carolina...
...owner Joan Taylor...
...Here's the story: "In an introductory computer science course, I was working on some simple problems involving the Gregorian calendar when I began to wonder how the Jewish calendar worked...
...I've loved animals my whole life,' said...
...Which is, we hope, the explanation for the Jerusalem Post ad passed on to us by subscriber Jill Golub—from, of course, Philadelphia...
...Californians may have figured out how to confess their sins and revel in their freedom on one-and-the-same day, but only in the New York area could they come up with a way to make a cake that satisfies both the spiritual needs of Rosh Hashanah and the rather different dietary requirements of Passover...
...Be sure to include your name, address and telephone number...
...He's truly one of a kind...
...I decided this was a perfect opportunity to test my newly acquired computer programming skills and so I wrote a program for a perpetual Jewish calendar...
...Zakon may well be right when he observes that its development might be a nice project for young people working on home computers...
...R. Blumenthal...
...Rabbi Andrew Sacks of Penn Valley passes along an item that reads, "The DuPont chemical company designed a cardboard pyramid demonstrating how to create a safe and healthy workplace...
...he saw the doctor...
...The following picture is from the Israeli magazine Newsvlew...
...Golub points out, it's either that, or else "somebody at the Post thought the soldiers needed something more than a ride home to make their leaves a little more pleasurable...
...It planned to call the pyramid "OSH-MID...
...We reprint in full the "Happy Ad," sent to us by Natalie Pelavin, so that you can share its absurd flavor...
...So in Texas, they're already celebrating Purim...
...That reminds us of a story we heard a while back: An American correspondent resident in Israel had been having very serious back pains...
...The operator regretted that she could find no listing in their name, but then asked "Are you looking for the Bruce and Reena who just bought a health food store Jaffa Road...
...Only in Israel Hitchhikers, beware...
...And the ride he gets is called a "tremp...
...Material cannot be returned...
...Obviously, that's a misspelling...
...He visited doctor after doctor, but none could help him...
...Finally, he called his mother in Columbus, Ohio, and asked her to arrange an appointment for him with his American physician...
...How about computerized Gematria...
...You think that's something...
...In the year 2000, Tu B'Shvat's on January 22 Reader Gary Zakon, of Framlngham, Mass., writes to share "an interesting application of the computer to Jewish religious life...
...Taylor said she did not think the celebration could in any way be construed as a religious affront...
...But DuPont...
...For those of you who aren't familiar with the term, "Yom Hashoah" is Holocaust Remembrance Day...
...ham-mantaschen...
...You've got to read pretty far down to get the point— but along the way, you'll also note that important holiday known as 'Tom Kipper...
...The Beth Israel Temple there received a promotional mailing addressed to "Beth I. Temple," and the salutation, of course, was "Dear Ms...
...As Ms...
...It informs us that "Four hundred pets and their owners have been invited to the world's first 'Bark-Mitzvah' for a 13 year-old mixed breed dog on Long Island Sept...
...Some ten minutes or so after speaking with his mother, his phone rang: "Forgive me," the voice at the other end said, "but I'm the operator who handled your overseas call, and I couldn't help hearing what you said...
...After doing a little reading I found that the calendar was more complicated than I had imagined...
...Anybody for a cowmunion...
...Kipper," otherwise known as the Herring Sea...
...We all love him and we know how much he cares deeply about everyone who is in need of care...
...Temple...
...111...
...At which point Zak turned to his grandfather and mat-ter-of-factly proclaimed, "Hey, Zaide, he's introducing God...
...the pains were relieved...
...In order to protect the innocent, we'll say only that the rabbi who submitted it (he's not from Pennsylvania) observes, "The sedra during the week the issue appeared was Ki Tetze"—roughly translated as "You shall come out...
...Well, chacun a son poo...
...Not knowing their home telephone, the friend dialed Information...
...Zakon asks, "Are there any other computer applications to Jewish religious life that moment readers know of...
...They probably meant...
...The item, submitted to us by Harriet Josefowicz, appeared in the New York Post of September 4, under the headline, "400 Pets Invited to Gala Benefit...
...She gave him the name...
...Underneath, the ad says, "Available for the Jewish holidays: round challah, plain or raisin...
...Depending on length, well pay from $5 to $50 for material that is accepted...
...In introducing Don Rickles, Lewis said, "He's always there when you need him...
...The program is written in PASCAL (which is, we observe in passing, entirely appropriate), and, while not the first such program—there's a company in New York that offers a computerized yahrzeit notice service—Mr...
...NOW MORE THAN EVER GIVE SOLDIERS "TRAMPS...
...Horrible taste of the month award This one could qualify, maybe, for the worst of the year...
...A hitchhiker in Israel is called a "trempist...
...he'd concluded that he had no choice but to return to the States for treatment...
...Feast, if you will, on the above photo from a Rockland County paper, sent to us by New City subscriber Mrs...
...I have the same problem with my back, and do I have a doctor...
Vol. 7 • November 1982 • No. 10
