Jew-Not Convert

...Sandra Shachar is a psychologist, and lives in St...

...I'm not interested in conversion or anything like that...

...The rituals and symbolism with which Judaism is so rich added a mystical quality to life such as I had never known before...

...The problems I encountered in becoming Jewish were not in learning observances or Hebrew, or explaining myself to relatives...

...But it was not until I began to study Judaism that I discovered a personally relevant spiritual and life philosophy...

...No doubt, the decision to convert—or not to—is a personal one, and depends upon the individual's background, attitudes, and willingness to undergo a change in spiritual and cultural identities...

...By the time of my high school graduation, I decided that I must be an atheist, since I could not accept a "Christian" approach to God and life...

...Dr...

...This analogical perspective made me feel more clear about my new Jewish identity...

...For me, Christianity ceased to be a source of spiritual growth by the age of ten, when I was confirmed as an Episcopalian...

...And, while I still sometimes wish I had been born Jewish, I am comforted by the thought of being able to raise my children Jewishly...

...Rabbi, please understand," I began...

...Contrary to popular belief, you do not have to be born Jewish to be "into" Judaism...

...However, I believe that we need to give a Jew who has converted the benefit of the doubt...

...he only had to hear that I wanted to learn and he was eager to teach...

...A friend, whose husband converted and shared my distaste for the term, explained it thus: no one converts to Judaism to become a convert...

...I had strong reservations about concepts such as "original sin," confessions, purgatory and hell...

...I just want to learn about Judaism...

...My roots are fresh in the rich soil of Jewish life and tradition, but they are firmly planted and grow deeper by the day...

...The Hebrew word used for conversion, "gerut," literally means adoption...

...One day, while I was feeling sorry for myself and my goyische upbringing, it occurred to me that I had been adopted into the Jewish Family and had been an active participant in that adoption...

...one converts to become a Jew...

...So that I could better understand the framework for his life, I took it upon myself to approach Rabbi Neal Borovitz at the Austin, Texas B'nai Brith Hillel Foundation...

...It is difficult for me to understand why those who were born Jewish are surprised that I find meaning in what they have held dear for thousands of years...

...I do, however, prefer not to be referred to as a "convert...

...And, as a college undergraduate, I dismissed all organized religion as a crutch for weak people who needed to be told what to do...

...Because, very simply, such discrimination exists...

...These are legitimate, well-founded fears forborne parents...

...I certainly don't deny that my spouse, Seth, was the impetus for my initial interest in Judaism...

...Will he/she keep a Jewish home, or will my son/ daughter be swayed from our teachings...

...Louis...

...While the verb describes a process by which one becomes Jewish, the noun only serves to separate one Jew from another...

...His approach to people, family, work and God both impressed and fascinated me...

...If not for the sake of a relationship, why convert...

...It is with trepidation, then, that I answer the question "yes," knowing that it only confirms their suspicions...

...You have to understand the assumptions underlying this question to know why I cringe when I hear it...

...In general, I am comfortable with my Jewishness, and have encountered no overt discrimination from other Jews...

...Raised in a family committed to Zionism and Jewish life, he embodies Jewish ideals in his philosophy and practice of daily living...

...I am only too happy to share my experience and correct any myths and misconceptions surrounding conversion...

...Establishing a Jewish identity was more of a challenge than all of these...

...For many of us our conversion was not a meaningless formality intended to satisfy in-laws and the conscience of our spouse, but rather a deeply spiritual life event...

...Unlike most Jews who have no choice about their faith and ethnicity, I have freely chosen mine...

...I am aware of the concern that Jewish parents have when their sons or daughters marry someone who has converted...

...With much pleasure I listen to my friends recall their Hebrew day schools, Zionist youth activities, and bar or bat mitzvahs, but I sometimes also feel deprived of those experiences...

...How committed is this person...

...Rabbi Borovitz didn't seem concerned with my ultimate goals...

...I cannot create for myself a Jewish childhood, nor can I trade in my relatives for Jewish parents and grandparents...

...However, I make sure that my oft-repeated explanation of why I converted is also heard...

...Despite my disdain for religion as I knew it, I retained a sense of a powerful, positive force in the world...

...As I have stated, I freely chose my faith and am proud of that choice...

...I, for one, do not mind my conversion being known to other Jews...

...Again, adoption is a useful analogy: singling out one Jew as a "convert" is similar to referring to one child in a family as "the adopted one...

...It is with hope that someday I will no longer feel the need to explain myself that I write this article...

...I also do not mind curiosity and questions about my background and conversion...

...I have found that many Jews cannot imagine why someone would convert to Judaism other than for the sake of a relationship and relatives...

...And what of our grandchildren—will they be raised as Jews, Gentiles, or something in between...

...I am undeniably different from those born Jewish...

...What I do mind are hasty assumptions and judgments about my commitment to Judaism...

...Perhaps as a routine measure with those contemplating the study of Judaism, however, the rabbi cautioned me: "It is stated in Torah that one should not discriminate against the widow, the orphan, and the 'convert.' Why," he asked rhetorically, "should there be such a commandment...