Catalog: Seder Tips
CATALOG SEDER TIPS FOURTEEN TIPS FOR A MORE SUCCESSFUL The Passover Seder is meant to be a joyous and inspiring event; too often, it ends up complicated and disconcerting. Whether your Seder is...
...One of the great unspoken issues for many people at the Seder is smoking...
...If you need help with the basics, such as how to set a Seder table, how to prepare the Seder plate, what an appropriate menu might be, you should know that most Haggadahs and Jewish cookbooks include this information...
...Would you prepare a Bar or Bat Mitzvah celebration without hours of planning...
...so are some of the additional readings that can be interpolated into the text...
...They want to know what Judaism can add, not what it can imitate...
...Anything you can do in the course of planning and preparing which will evoke questions is a benefit...
...A good plan may be to have certain reference points, but allow for a good deal of flexibility on the way from each to the next...
...The hunt for the afikoman is an obvious aid...
...Like poker, the Seder should be played by house rules...
...The traditional four questions are just to get us started...
...This does not mean that a detailed script needs to be written...
...Some people like to take time to relate tales of how they have broken out of their own private slaveries, towards freedom and redemption...
...It may take two or three seasons to come to feel thoroughly at home with the holiday, but it's worth the effort, and our evidence suggests that growing numbers of people are out there trying to develop a style of celebration that befits the occasion and its message...
...Some people prefer a small, intimate Seder...
...And most of them don't need a second-rate effort at 'relevance...
...6. Personalizing the Seder is a must...
...Pesach is a natural...
...Many people include in their Seder reading material from recent Jewish history...
...3. The mix of guests is, of course, very important...
...Knowing your own capacities and those of your guests, you should do what's comfortable for you and them...
...The Seder does not have to be converted into a political rally, but if each of us is to regard himself as though he personally had left Egypt, then knowing where the Red Sea still flows, and who, these days, is still trapped on slavery's banks, is an important addition, one which makes Pesach not only a celebration but an annual rededication...
...These days, with increasing sensitivity to the needs of non-smokers, it may be wise to announce at the outset whether smoking will be permitted, and when, or whether, the policy will be entirely laissez-faire...
...others, the centrally traditional...
...each of us should ask new ones, nor need we fear that there may be questions without answers...
...We heard recently of a guest who volunteered to bring the wine for a Seder of 30 people, and showed up with two quarts...
...our preference is for a mix which allows for some guests who have special skills—rich memories, good voices, what have you—and others for whom an invitation to a well-run Seder will provide a real learning experience...
...Earlier generations are not scowling at our lapses, judging our performance...
...Even the most alienated Jew can find something to relate to in the traditional text...
...2. The Haggadah tells the story of The Four Sons—one of whom didn't know which questions to ask...
...So don't be afraid to ask guests to bring certain foods, although you ought to make clear to them the level of your Passover kashrut observance...
...4. Which brings us to curiosity...
...Know your guests, and don't feel shy about asking them, when you invite them, whether they'd feel comfortable reading in Hebrew...
...that's what they're up to all the time...
...It's always been that way...
...As we've said before in these pages, many people who want to celebrate Pesach, because they sense its possibilities, feel uptight about it, self-conscious regarding their lack of familiarity with the tradition...
...one to Israel and its continuing struggle to be free...
...7. The Seder is a uniquely participatory event...
...One Seder we know, while preserving the bulk of the original text, dedicates each of the four cups of wine to a particular theme, with appropriate readings and songs: one to the Holocaust and the uprisings in the camps and in the ghettos...
...Will interruptions be welcomed, tolerated, or prohibited...
...The celebration of spring is also a part of the story...
...we own it, and have the right to decorate, to expand, contract, shape it...
...Herewith, some tips, compiled by our editors and writers: 1. The Boy Scouts are right: Be Prepared...
...the last to people of all races and faiths, in South Africa and in Czechoslovakia and so many other places, who labor for freedom...
...And adding your own songs and stories, perhaps after a family discussion, is always fun...
...We avoid expressing our own preference here, save to note that if you have many guests, and want each to be reading from the same Haggadah, there's a significant investment of money involved, and you ought to look well before you leap...
...We've found that what seems appealingly innovative this year, and next, comes to seem tedious after a time...
...We do not merely lease the holiday for an evening, to return it undamaged...
...No need for lectures...
...One family we know reviews, each year, the songs it has added— songs like "Blowin' in the Wind" and "If I Had a Hammer"—and determines which ones still feel right, what new ones it now wants...
...And for goodness' sake, if you're going to go around the table having people read out aloud, be sure you don't embarrass those who can't read Hebrew by assigning them a Hebrew portion...
...Pesach is not a pediatric holiday...
...Some time spent in family meetings can lend importance to the occasion, as well as help you to "own" the holiday, to put your distinctive imprint on its celebration...
...Almost any style will do, but precisely because of that your guests will feel more comfortable knowing what to expect...
...5. Haggadahs are traditionally an area of intense debate...
...Fortunately, the hosts had a case in reserve in the basement...
...It does mean that the Seder should be treated as a major event...
...The uprising of the Warsaw Ghetto began on Pesach night, making it an especially appropriate remembrance, as is also the struggle of Soviet Jewry...
...Kids are usually fascinated, for example, by such questions as why Moses is not mentioned in the text, or by the tale of God's reaction to Miriam's rejoicing over the drowning of the Egyptians...
...table decora-, tions and appropriate texts might so note, thereby giving a lift to everyone—e specially after the kind of winter those of us in the Eastern two-thirds of America are having this year...
...Pesach commands us to lean back in our chairs, to feel ourselves truly free...
...Recordings with the traditional Passover melodies are available at Jewish bookstores or through temple gift shops...
...Will the ideas of others, their approaches, customs, explanations and melodies be accepted...
...one to Soviet Jews...
...its themes thunder significance for every age...
...Let them know, too, the size and needs of the group, and, if you're a guest, it's best to err on the side of generosity...
...You may want to ask some guests to prepare certain readings in advance, or to find an interesting commentary, or to teach a particular song...
...And I was dead wrong...
...Best of all, let smokers use the occasion to move towards genuine freedom from their own slavery...
...Jewish law permits smoking on Passover...
...Don't overworry...
...But without converting those themes into pap, it's possible to prepare in a way that will hold the attention of children...
...Some Seder guests are usually eager to help, to make the experience more fully shared, and there is no reason why one or two people should spend several days in self-inflicted kitchen martyr- . dom—unless they honestly want to...
...In a year in which so many of us have read or watched Roots, it may not be a bad idea to remind ourselves of the continuing struggle of Black Americans, whose music of freedom, incidentally, so often is based on Passover themes...
...Accordingly, you may want to work with a traditional Haggadah, adding your own looseleaf-style mimeographed of duplicated pages anew each year...
...Partly in order to accommodate them, I selected a Haggadah with a 'relevant' approach...
...9. You may want to take a minute or two at the beginning of your Seder to outline the evening's "agenda" for your guests...
...as well as historic, holiday...
...One of our sources adds the following interesting observation: "Two years ago I ran a Seder which included a number of guests who were pretty alienated from Jewish life and ritual...
...Some people prefer the wholly innovative...
...8. Participation in preparation of the meal is also customary...
...Whether your Seder is traditional or modern, or, as is often the case these days, a bit of both, it can benefit from forethought...
...There are many "How To" guides available (The Passover Anthology by Philip Goodman, published by The Jewish Publication Society of America, for example) that include a wealth of interesting and helpful, but not overwhelming, materials...
...And remember to make room for the intangible guests: an empty chair and table setting for the Soviet Jews who cannot yet celebrate Pesach in freedom, and, of course, Elijah...
...Relax...
...Take the empty chair: the questions will come naturally, as should the answers...
...But later generations do depend on it...
Vol. 2 • February 1977 • No. 5
