An interim step toward gay marriage
Hausknecht, Murray
WHEN THE New Jersey Supreme Court ruled in October 2006 that gay and lesbian couples must be guaranteed the same rights and benefits as heterosexual couples, the legislature saw only two...
...Ignoring for the moment the last part of the definition, this means that a marriage is "legal union" when a man and a woman secure a license—that is, the state's permission—to participate in a ceremony conducted by an agent of the state (typically an ordained member of the clergy, a judge, or simply any person so empowered) who pronounces them husband and wife...
...One facet of that meaning is that, except for a relatively small minority, most couples are married in a religious ceremony in a sacred place—church, synagogue, mosque— DISSENT / Spring 2007 9 or, if elsewhere, in a ceremony conducted by a member of a clergy...
...On the other hand, it is not as virulent a presence as it was in the past...
...If only the state can create the "legal union" commonly called "marriage," the third option becomes obvious: a law that requires all couples, homosexual and heterosexual, who wish to possess all the rights and privileges heretofore enjoyed only by heterosexual couples, to receive a license and then certification of a legal union from the state...
...after all, they are a man and woman united in a legal union...
...WHEN THE New Jersey Supreme Court ruled in October 2006 that gay and lesbian couples must be guaranteed the same rights and benefits as heterosexual couples, the legislature saw only two possibilities: establishing civil unions or legalizing same-sex marriages...
...A formal definition of marriage clarifies the logic of this option...
...A marriage ceremony performed under religious auspices, then, makes marriage a "sacred contract" different from a secular, civil contract...
...It may also lead to further theological reflections on the "sinfulness" of those unions...
...today there is a commonplace acceptance of black Americans in many public spheres of life such as accommodations, politics, and the workplace...
...HERE A COMPARISON to the civil rights movement is apt...
...So far I have been careful to use the terms "formal definition" and "legal marriage," because neither a dictionary definition nor a consideration of the legal dimensions of marriage exhausts its cultural meaning...
...On the other hand, some clergy do perform commitment ceremonies that look a lot like wedding ceremonies, thus lending a somewhat sacred aura to the relationship...
...The option may make it easier for these ceremonies to occur because the couples are already legally united, and it might also, therefore, eliminate some current religious controversies about such ceremonies...
...To grant homosexual and heterosexual couples the same legal status blurs that difference and would provoke fear and anxiety...
...The third option would not significantly change this understanding of marriage...
...The movement forced Americans to confront their prejudices and the legitimacy of segregation, and that ultimately led to the support and passage of civil rights laws...
...Almost all marriages, whether in a cathedral, a judge's chambers, or a city hall, are typically celebrated with a wedding party of relatives, friends, and neighbors...
...The legislation spells out the benefits, such as family leave and full adoption rights, the right to change a surname without a court petition, workers compensation benefits, and protection under the laws governing health benefits and pensions...
...In the light of that history it is not unreasonable for most Americans to fear that even debate about the third option, much less its adoption, will result in an increasing acceptance of gay and lesbian unions as "normal" relationships...
...it remains a strong and persistent feature of the culture and society...
...That law, like New Jersey's civil-union law, would, of course, include the rights and privileges the certification guarantees...
...If adopted, the option would have certain immediate advantages for politicians as well as for homosexual couples...
...Heterosexuals, united with or without a religious ceremony, would continue to see themselves and be seen by others as "married...
...it represents the difference with those who, if not inherently abnormal, choose a morally perverse sexual relationship unlike that of "normal" people...
...Perhaps that is the best reason to hope that the option will win the support of gay rights movements and become an issue for public discussion and legislative debate...
...While always keeping in mind John Maynard Keynes's admonition about the long run, these fears may very well be realized as long-term consequences...
...The party confirms the couple's new status— one anticipated by the bachelor party and bridal shower preceding the marriage—as an officially married couple in the sight of God, the state, their community, and their own selfimage as a couple...
...10 DISSENT / Spring 2007...
...the third option would not permit the state to marry them, and to date no religion permits same-sex marriages...
...because the state is merely passing a law sanctioning a civil contract between two individuals, there would be no need to even raise the question of same-sex marriage...
...The situation of homosexual couples would also be unchanged in some respects...
...Once the document certifying the legal union is issued, no further ceremony is needed for the couple to possess the same legal rights as today's married couples...
...It would allow legislatures to finesse the marriage issue...
...At the heart of homosexuality as a social issue is the belief of most Americans that it is abnormal and morally unacceptable behavior...
...In short, from a purely legal perspective there is, with one exception, no difference between legal marriage and the civil union of a gay or lesbian couple...
...Marriage" is a claim to superior status...
...Indeed, there is now strong social disapproval of racially prejudiced behavior and speech...
...Politicians could respond by saying that the state is no longer in the marriage business, and, therefore, there is no discrimination against homosexuals...
...Legally speaking, then, marriage is civil contract between a man and a woman sanctioned by the state, which thereby grants certain rights, privileges, and responsibilities to the couple...
...The laws did not eliminate racism...
...The exception is that the latter cannot claim to be "married...
...How likely is it that the third option will be considered, let alone adopted...
...MURRAY HAUSKNECHT iS a sociologist who writes frequently for Dissent...
...Although younger Americans seem not to accept this belief, giving many people hope that time is on the side of social acceptance...
...They chose the first alternative without considering a possible third option: civil unions for all couples and no marriages performed by the state...
...Not very...
...According to the American Heritage Dictionary, marriage is "the legal union of a man and a woman as husband and wife...
...A New York Times story reported that, under New Jersey's civil-union law, homosexual couples are to be "treated like married couples" by employers and such entities as hospitals and insurance companies...
...Gays and lesbians could not claim, as some do today, that they are being treated unequally because the state still does not permit same-sex marriage...
...But most will also have some formal religious ceremony with the before and after celebrations...
...merely raising the possibility of equal legal status questions the culturally taken-for-granted view of homosexuality as sinfully deviant behavior...
...But this argument raises two questions: where does it leave "marriage" and what are the chances of its adoption...
Vol. 54 • April 2007 • No. 2
