The War in Algeria: "This Climate of Hate and Fear"
Each night, in the midst of exhausting work, I try to state the problem anew, to gather the threads, to see my way clear. What can I tell you that you don't know? Nothing. The frightening...
...A simple clerk in the sub-prefect feels outraged by the idea that he could no longer order the "chaouch" around...
...what might have been saved earlier cannot be saved today...
...The army—commanders, captains, lieutenants— how troubled they are...
...Where does it exist...
...Still another discovery I have made here, comparable to one in Indochina...
...I feel so ashamed, seeing the Europeans' hatred and the hatred we have unchained here...
...That can make you think...
...What happened to the antimilitarism of my youth...
...It's hard to stay calm...
...Even if you are poor trash, in a century's time you get used to having beneath you others who are more miserable than you, and you cling to this state of affairs with all your might...
...The frightening atmosphere —the climate of hate and violence—the incredible effort it takes to find oneself again, to get back to one's overall view of the problem...
...A man of deep sincere leftist convictions, here in order to retain just a little contact, killed by people who fight for their liberty...
...At times I am not proud of some uncontrolled reflex, or of having held my peace in some conversation...
...disinterestedness...
...Sometimes (the better ones) how torn...
...Do you still believe in brotherhood or in friendship among nations...
...Every day I see assassinations, mouths cut, throats slit...
...Until proof to the contrary I am holding on to this belief, without being overly particular about blunders like Mollet's trip and speech...
...What an insane world...
...I feel that we absolutely must negotiate...
...Among some officers certain values which seem to have all but vanished here still exist: a sense of greatness, of work well done...
...Whatever we might want to do we will have to do against all the French in Algeria...
...Save what can be saved through negotiations, without panic and without surrender...
...Yesterday I was ambushed and very nearly killed by buckshot...
...WHAT can we do...
...Objectively I am participating in this war, on the side of the colonialists...
...For the Algerian French, the idea of progress toward equality is incon ceivable...
...But it is getting late...
...The pressure is terrible: Newspapers, radio, conversations, everyday talks—all converging toward the same conclusion: "They" understand nothing but force—let's deal them one big blow...
...A funny thing for an old leftist to discover...
...On each level everybody clings to his little kingdom and nobody wants to let go...
...The temptation was strong to go back home: "I'm not going to eat this kind of bread...
...I feel that unless decisions are taken in favor of negotiations, terrible things are bound to happen here...
...My God, it's not all so simple...
...A foreman here would be a laborer in France, an overseer a worker, etc...
...Here's one of my most important discoveries here: All the French in Algeria, from the biggest to the smallest, stick together—a sort of shameful solidarity in damnation...
...To say they are mad, that they fool themselves, that they are be ing fooled won't get us anywhere...
...I felt like talking with you tonight —alone in this hostile city, amidst people whom I can no longer recognize as speaking my language (the Europeans here) and in the face of Algerians with whom we have very few contacts and sometimes such inhuman and desperate contacts...
...They cannot understand anything but their own interests, no matter how small...
...SOMETIMES you contrast the "big" with the "little" whites...
...The army is something that lives, moves, wonders...
...I am a man of the 'left' and I'm not going to take part in this business...
...That's a great mistake...
...Meanwhile, I am trying my best to protect isolated farmers, to protect families, to help them avoid the blind thrusts of the Army...
...What a preposterous end that would have been...
...How hesitant...
...I don't know any longer...
...conscience...
...In your eyes I am no doubt too deeply involved in the system...
...I am staying here just a little longer with the intense hope that a Socialist policy in AIgeria cannot be the pol222 Icy of Faure or Soustelle...
...Goodbye...
...We are in a total impasse and 100,000 more men won't change the facts...
Vol. 3 • July 1956 • No. 3
