A victim's defense of priests
Urekew, Terry Donovan
THE LAST WORD A VICTIM'S DEFENSE OF PRIESTS Terry Donovan Urekew The current crisis in the Catholic Church regarding the sexual abuse of children by members of the clergy certainly demands our...
...After making bail, my perpetrator would continue to live his life, work in his chosen profession...
...Terry Donovan Urekew lives in Springfield, Kentucky.eld, Kentucky...
...THE LAST WORD A VICTIM'S DEFENSE OF PRIESTS Terry Donovan Urekew The current crisis in the Catholic Church regarding the sexual abuse of children by members of the clergy certainly demands our attention...
...Go for the dough...
...He would, of course, be presumed guilty immediately, with no consideration given to the validity of my accusation...
...He would stand trial, and, his word against mine, probably go free...
...The details of my accusation would be table talk from one end of this country to the other...
...And what of the priests who are accused unjustly...
...That certainly takes the choice out of my hands...
...People in the media will somehow be called to bear their pain...
...On the other hand, if I were to hunt down and accuse the family friend who abused me, another story would develop...
...Or journalists and newscasters...
...And, ultimately, the Catholic people will pay...
...If I were to make public allegations against the priest who abused me, what would happen...
...Even if there were no statute of limitations for this crime, I would choose not to accuse my perpetrators...
...All this would happen whether or not he was guilty...
...Any abuse of children should provoke the wrath of us all and should be punished to the fullest extent of the law...
...Or the firefighters union...
...Sexual abuse, any abuse, of our children is clearly wrong...
...It satisfies something deep within me to leave them in the hands of God...
...Each payment made to victims places more burden on us, the working and retired parishioners whose contributions support our church...
...His life would get back to normal, even if he was guilty...
...But these false accusations are yet another kind of abuse, and they cause inordinate trauma to the victims...
...We all own the problem...
...Or rabbis...
...My own sexual abuse happened more than thirty years ago, in Boston, Massachusetts...
...His name and photo would appear in local, regional, and state newspapers, and on local, even national television...
...You can be sure the priests will pay...
...But I suggest that the current emphasis on clergy abuse is disproportionate and inappropriate simply because it ignores and downplays child sexual abuse by members of all other groups...
...The media and class-action lawyers nullify both the spirit and intent of our child-abuse laws, and make a mockery of our judicial system...
...I certainly believe that anyone who molests children should pay...
...But, we must remember, it is equally wrong whether the perpetrator is the child's daddy, uncle, friend, or church leader...
...The Catholic clergy doesn't own this problem...
...My perpetrators are dealing with worse than I have been through...
...If I were to accuse my priest abuser, the class-action lawyers would make sure I ended up with a substantial sum of money...
...Those other three men will never be prosecuted, will never pay for their crimes...
...I know at least three persons who have made allegations against priests whose primary, more severe, abuse was at the hands of men who were not priests...
...Or factory workers...
...Another element in the crisis is the potential for financial compensation...
...He would be forbidden to continue in his ministry...
...As brutal as the abuse was, as significant the loss of innocence, as devastating the betrayal of trust, I have come through it to the other side...
...There are priests, and bishops, being falsely accused during this recent hype-and members of the media must bear some responsibility for that...
...As a victim of sexual abuse-first by a family friend, and later by a Catholic priest-I am appalled and angered at the recent emphasis on clergy abuse...
...His reputation would be destroyed, and his future would be forever changed...
...Why don't we seek to expose all members of the local plumbers union who are abusers...
...The going rate for clergy sexual abuse seems pretty high...
...My non-clergy abuser, however, probably wouldn't end up paying anything to compensate me for pain, suffering, and the loss of my innocence...
...My lawyer would seek an indictment and arrest...
...Pedophilia knows no cultural, ethnic, socioeconomic, or religious boundaries...
...The cardinal graciously forgave the man, but the toll it took quite possibly hastened his death...
...They must live with themselves...
...They will jump on any story, no matter how farfetched, how absurd, simply because it makes great copy...
...His health, future, career, and ministry were all damaged by a man who later recanted the whole story...
...We have a recent, much publicized example in Cardinal Joseph Bernardin...
...There would be, perhaps, a small article on page nine of the local paper...
...I am much stronger for having dealt with the pain...
...I have had many years in which to recover and heal...
Vol. 129 • October 2002 • No. 17
