In the Palm of God's Hand
McGowan, Jo
In the palm of God's hand P9^(E9 I'1'1'1- nn three children were babies, one of ¦ W^WM ^w '-t'1!'^ s I particularly liked was their disH^B^H own o: their hands. Ft was so surprising HHMI lo...
...Ft was so surprising HHMI lo i'.u h one of them in their turn when tlifsi- nh|i'i I- f1'Mtiii£ past their line of vision were suddi'iih n i o^n 1 /w\ .mil seen for what they were—a part ii* thL'in-i'U i"- and 'irder their control...
...Commonweal 17 July 16,1999...
...It is one of those mysteries of our faith that in going to him, she seems to be moving backward in time, while in fact, like all true mystics, she is disregarding it...
...1o\ \1u\ Ims Urn a mystery since the very beginning...
...i-i:r nine-year-old daughter, Moy Moy: H.ind rci^ml P'tuiiied...
...One day while sitting with her, I remembered a line from a hymn we sang when I was growing up: "I will never forget you, my people/ I have carved you in the palm of my hand...
...I believe he is studying her, with a mercy and a love so enticing it can only call her forward to him...
...One L»y one, we watched her go through thorn all again, moving backward in exactly the same order as >.hi- hci.l i-arlier progressed...
...put in their mouths, tnken out, reg.mleil --ill' innlv...
...In spoixh it h.i- been the same: From short sentences 'witti dinl 11Iten surprisingly subtle) she reverted to lhri'e-w»rd phra<-i- later two, later one, and finally to the w iM-dli'is hibblt of the infant (she still chants, howi-vt-r -a simnd i\e .ill simply love and long to hear...
...as her balance became "Iiti1 pri\.irv...
...Their hands be1 inii" thiir ra\ onle toys, played with aidlessly, brought tiiiiftlui, pulled .jpcirl...
...she sits so quietly that I have to keep checking to see if she is awake...
...flu1.-HI J .vhi...
...It was while I was puzzling over this that I realized I had to stop saying that Moy Moy was regressing or going backward: such negative, censorious words in our progress-oriented society...
...It is the work of a lifetime and generally happens only through hard discipline...
...Jo McGowan ami her family live in India...
...Moy Moy is achieving it as lightly as a butterfly...
...i«- .1 "i ¦'.:» a! p.Tl of development and heralds the ivginn we, -t 1 In- t-v motor skills that make the human infjnl ^> Juri-ient hom any other creature...
...From running and hopping, she ->liu\ed to a walk...
...ind discovered all over again...
...beautifully (she had a mild mentjl hamli ~ay but she talked and walked and did naughty tilings and lold jokes and held us spellbound 1 wlh hc-i enchanting personality...
...he required someone at her side, hol.Iing o-.it- h.in...
...Next it was on both sides that she needed support: .ind later she was back to crawling...
...pr«-fi t.itj !i> ^it in one place, untempted by the lu\s imi biink-> tluit used to draw her like a magnet, prujipi-il up on .ill Mcles now by pillows as, even sitlnw, sin- Ctinm" be -ure of her balance...
...1 ln«.d regard riiT.urged some time ago, and she would sit fascinated by the twirling graceful movements of her fingers...
...hould never have been conceived ilii-r molhi r bad K-i-n sterilized), nor born (her mother «.iiiiUil an >iK>rlionl...
...Ami until th«- a;je of five, she went on defying the ndds ,ind ilexeliipm...
...She is a baby, but so unlike one that her presence invites, or demands, contemplation...
...This is a fierce one, a violent one, one which promises pain and suffering in exchange for God's regard: Why "carved...
...A Zen Buddhist teacher once instructed his student to "show me your original face...
...It is> a strange image, not at all the gentle, loving one we get in the old Irish blessing ("May God hold you in the palm of his hand...
...I find myself thinking in new ways as I gaze at her, her small hand in mine^—almost as if our bodies have merged and I am, like her, moving through time not toward the end of the day or the week, but toward eternity...
...lint uriiikViumtiibly, each one of the developmental -lai-t1*" we had i'h-.i-i ved so eagerly in all three of our 1 hi Id 1 en bi-g.m appearing again m Mov Moy, but this tjmt- in re\ erse...
...When I consider Moy Moy and the intensity of her life's carving in the palm of God's hand, I can only believe that his regard for her must be as intense...
...nor alive (she arrived twelve weeks )*-t m-itur* on ilv side of a road in a village in India) uji all Mt these things, and our adopted daughter as well...
...So it was w ith ,1 piiii;n.inl m-m-c of loss that 1 read in the pcdia•:i!i ..i"<- rii'ir- in...
...In the last lew v. »-eks she has become more tentative about ll'al...
...She is founder of Karuna Vilwr, a school for children with special needs in Dehra Doon...
...Hex breathing hns the rhythmic cadence of sleep and yet there is a quality of receptive alertness which suggests a heightened awareness...
...The Christian vision consistently turns things upside down, valuing and praising those very states that the world rejects—weakness, poverty, suffering, and death—and calling them by other names: humility, blessedness, power, victory...
...now, although this seems to have disappeared as well, I find myself regarding her hands almost as raptly as she once did...
...I love to hold her in my arms and listen to music...
Vol. 126 • July 1999 • No. 13
