A day off, with twins
Doyle, Brian
THE LAST WORD A day off, with twins BRIAN DOYLE At four o'clock one re-cent morning, as I was walking laps around my house with my new twin sons Liam and Joseph on my shoulders, trying to induce...
...Hey, Klamath Falls won...
...Lily sings along...
...Theme song comes on...
...As I watched the car slide slowly out of sight, I realized that (a) I could not get to work, (b) I could let my wife sleep, (c) I was on duty all day...
...I give up and get bottle ready...
...Boys should be asleep for quite a while," says wife...
...Seven p.m.: Dinner-yesterday's chicken, two rubbery carrots, what appears to be a zucchini, three green beans...
...This is a rare event in our wet Oregon valley, and it would, I knew, shut down the town...
...He simply picks up his pace and drowns out Kiri Te Kanawa...
...Realize that I love them with inarticulate, ferocious love...
...Pause in action for kiss...
...Joe wide awake...
...Appears to know some thirty characters and actors by name...
...Boys howling in bedroom...
...Tough...
...Bliss...
...Wonder when he found time to write...
...Boys arranged in such a way that dad can with great difficulty open the sports section of the paper...
...Result presentable...
...Ah, yes, "The Dead," in Dubliners...
...Section mostly Oregon high school football results...
...Noon: Lily eating banana and cookies for lunch...
...Out of a writer's itch to record, and the need to tell the world how very bizarre a day with newborn twins can be, I decided to keep a running account...
...Five A.M.: Still can't get over snowfall...
...There was a great deal of snow...
...I head for a couch to nap...
...Wonder where exactly Klamath Falls is...
...am moving into jazz...
...lock up house, turn out lights, adjust thermostat, stare out window...
...Snow falling silently in gobs the size of cats...
...Boys snap awake and stare at me...
...Wonder what he played for them...
...Joseph doesn't like jazz much...
...Can only get to one page, though-the agate type, results of games, lineups...
...Joe begins to cry...
...Has not yet belched and is squirming uncomfortably...
...Brief prayer for soul of Mozart...
...snow falling faintly through the universe and faintly falling, like the descent of their last end, upon all the living and the dead...
...Wife in shower...
...Shocking event...
...Boy can sleep through anything...
...Ten A.M.: Both boys awake and yowling...
...He began with a whimper and built up to an operatic series of screams and wails...
...Two P.M.: Shower...
...Door closes with a click...
...It has begun to rain, and the snow is slowly sliding down the hill...
...it would be a great pleasure to have enormous hands come out of the sky and wrap me up in blankets and put me to sleep...
...She is seated in tiny rocking chair, covered with blanket, clutching bear...
...Read with interest...
...Have exhausted Puccini, Verdi, Vivaldi...
...Resolve to find out someday...
...Realize with surprise that I will miss the lovely funny chaos of day at home with wife and children...
...Both boys asleep on dad, who is still in robe and slippers...
...Brian Doyle is the editor of Portland Magazine at the University of Portland, in Oregon.ortland, in Oregon...
...Joe likes opera and is sometimes settled by it...
...Mozart's sons remind me that Shakespeare had twins...
...Lily loves it when dad makes breakfast...
...The prospect of a nap falls away faintly, faintly falling...
...I put a Puccini tape on very softly...
...Remember that Henson is dead...
...Resolve to pray for him, poor man...
...Six A.M.: Joe still crying...
...Paper ten days old...
...I love you when you're home," she says, and disappears back into blankets...
...Nine a.m.: Joe asleep, Liam awake, their sister Lily, age three, calling from upstairs: "Dad, I have to go to the bathroom...
...Filled with joy, briefly ponder staying up to read like a mature normal curious man of letters, get grip on reality, resolve to get into bed and snatch half hour of sleep, and...
...Dad resolves to write love letter to Jim Henson...
...Wonder what genius invented shower...
...Work never seemed easier...
...Resolve to find out someday...
...Lily busily eating banana and cookies for dinner...
...Five P.M.: Joseph imitating airplane on takeoff...
...On the way pass master bedroom, tell lovely exhausted wife that she's off duty, I'm home for day...
...wife's face so lovely and tired that I open best bottle of wine in the house and put it by her plate...
...9:02 P.M.: Do so...
...Construct wall of pillows around Joe on couch and then grab Liam like football and shuffle upstairs...
...Good man-made my daughter happy...
...Lily watching "Sesame Street," eating a banana and two cookies for breakfast...
...Great ending...
...no one cries at work...
...Great guy died young...
...keep reading paper...
...This means he can be rolled up in his blankets like a pink cigar and stashed in the bassinet...
...Liam belches-another great ending...
...I put on Don Giovanni, he falls asleep like a stone...
...Three p.m.: Wife feeds boys, who sprawl on the bed in milky stupor...
...I like jazz...
...Wonder briefly who invented pasta...
...Sight reminds me of James Joyce-doesn't Joyce end a story that way...
...Probably never been done before...
...Realize that I will have to go to work tomorrow...
...Nothing to be done...
...Liam sleeping like tree...
...Thank stars for pasta...
...upon checking, discover wife changing one and juggling other...
...I envy him...
...Shuffle over the bookshelf, leaving Joseph on the couch, carting Liam under my arm...
...Had sons, I think...
...Steam everything in sight and then mix with pasta...
...Results sound familiar-check date and paper...
...Stay in shower almost until...
...THE LAST WORD A day off, with twins BRIAN DOYLE At four o'clock one re-cent morning, as I was walking laps around my house with my new twin sons Liam and Joseph on my shoulders, trying to induce the boys to belch, I noticed a car sliding backwards down our hill...
...Sigh...
...Then I noticed that the hill was covered with snow...
...Resolve to find out someday...
...Wife and daughter go out to play in snow, build snowman, etc...
...Nine P.M.: Lily in bed, wife in bed, boys asleep for the moment...
...Good enough...
...Eight A.M.: Liam sleeping like log, rock, mountain...
...Guzzled entire bottle in two minutes...
Vol. 122 • January 1995 • No. 2
