A case for gay marriage

...Society has a vested interest in stable, committed relationships--especially, as in the case of most heterosexual couples, when children are concerned...

...In New York aaI-ried municipal workers who have lived east a year may register their relationships :partment, attesting to a "close and corn22 November 1991:681 mitted" relationship "involving shared responsibilities," and are then entitled to bereavement leave...

...A woman and her live-in maid...

...Cultural condemnations and biblical prohibitions of (usually male) homosexual behavior were founded upon an incomplete understanding of human sexuality...

...It could take an array of judicial decision making to find out...

...Yet for unmarried heterosexual couples, marriage is at least an option...

...gay marriage would celebrate the loving, committed relationship between two individuals, a relationship in which sexual behavior is one small part...

...Heterosexual marriage would still be the ulimate social union for heterosexuals...

...ome cite the promiscuity of some male gays as if this is an indication that all homosexuals are incapable or undeserving of marriage...

...In short, regardless of the potential societal gains, should society and the church reserve a centuries-old moral stand that condemns homosexual sexual behavior...

...And in a society where most cities have at least one openly gay bar and sizable gay communities--where lesbians and gays appear regularly on television and in the movies--a committed relationship between two people of the same sex is not nearly the break from convention that a polygamous one is...

...We have no choice...

...the premises upon which the moral stand are based have changed...

...it has never been seriously suggested that the existence of promiscuous heterosexuals invalidate all heterosexuals from the privilege of marriage...

...At the time, fifteen other states also had such marital prohibitions...

...And throw the weight of our religious institutions behind such unions...

...Of course, legal and religious gay marriage wouldn't, as some writers claim, "celebrate" or be "an endorsement" of homosexual sexual behavior--any more than heterosexual marriage celebrates heterosexual sex or endorses it...

...It's actually a conservative move, not a liberal one...

...Gay marriage wouldn't weaken the family...

...sbians and gays have fought for"domestic to extend some marital and family benefits ---cohabitating partners either unwilling iosexuals, unable to marry...

...the point is that he did not...

...Since heterosexuality appears to be at least as immutable as homosexuality (and since there's no evidence that the prevalence of homosexuality increases following the decriminalization of it), there's no chance heterosexuals would opt for the "homosexual alternative...

...Of course, there's no reason why lesbians and gays should be granted moral leniency over heterosexuals-which is why perhaps the most acceptable expression of samesex sexuality should be within the context of a government sanctioned, religiously blessed marriage...

...The unprecedented social legitimacy given gay partnerships-and homosexuality in general--would have other societal benefits as well: it would dramatically reduce the widespread housing and job discrimination, and verbal and physical violence experienced by most lesbians and gays, clear moral and social evils...

...In 1959, Richard Loving, a white man, could have chosen a different partner to marry other than Mildred Jeter, a black woman...

...None of the recent thirty-five studies on homosexual parents has shown that parental sexual orientation has any adverse effect on children (and the children of gays are no more likely to be gay themselves...

...Kissing...

...Comments continued on next page) 22 November 1991:683...

...Gay marriage would simply recognize a consistent crossculturat, transhistorical minority and allow that significant minority to also participate in an important social institution...

...And then there are issues of 1 spouse cannot be compelled to testify 'tner) and inheritance, tenancy, and cong concerns for many gays as a result of rs alone, a need exists...

...But by eliminating the financial and legal advantages to marriage, domestic partnership dilutes that institution...

...Critics maintain that gays can marry--just not to members of their same s e x . But with regard to marriage, whether homosexual behavior is a choice or not is irrelevant, since one's marriage partner is necessarily a choice...

...But since moral sanction is not withheld from infertile couples or those who intend to remain childless, this standard is clearly being inconsistently-and unfairly--applied...

...But such a prescription is inadequate...

...And it would reduce the number of shameful parents who disown their children or banish their gay teen-agers to lives of crime, prostitution, and drug abuse, or to suicide (psychologists estimate that gay youth comprise up to 30 percent of all teen suicides, and one Seattle study found that a whopping 40 percent of that city's street kids may be lesbian or gay, most having run away or been expelled from intolerant homes...

...And if homosexuals are more likely than heterosexuals to be promiscuous--and if continual, harsh condemnation hasn't altered that fact--the sensible solution would seem to be to try to lure gays back to the monogamous fold by providing efforts in that direction with some measure of respect and social support: something gay marriage would definitely provide...

...A CASE FOR GAY MARRIAGE IN SUPPORT OF LOVING & MONOGAMOUS RELATIONSHIPS BRENT HARTINGER . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ;........, _9 oemOoOOOOOOOmlmeuomoUoUoOOoOoOoOoOoOoOmetOoOoOoO ~ D~OoOoOoOeOoOoOoOoOoOoO'O'OOOOOOtPdl~ ~ w ~ - ~ m m You read CO/g_MO~ for its values, its ideas, the range of its interests, the quality and relevance of the information it supplies...

...There is a simpler solution...

...And since marriage licenses are not rationed out, homosexual partnerships wouldn't deny anyone else the privilege...

...In the wake of AIDS, encouraging gay monogamy is simply rational public health policy...

...Clearly, one's sexual orientation is different from one's race...

...Human beings are sexual creatures...

...The priest chooses celibacy (asexuality isn't required), but this is a choice--one made well after adolescence...

...Some maintain that there are compelling state interests to prohibiting same-sex marriages: that tolerance for gay marriages would open the door for any number of unconventional marital arrangements--group marriage, for example...

...In the vast majority of respects, gay relationships closely resemble heterosexual ones--or even actually improve upon them (gay relationships tend to be more egalitarian than heterosexual ones...

...Same-sex sexual fantasy...

...It would reduce the atmosphere of ridicule and abuse in which the children of homosexual parents grow up...

...Moral condemnation of homosexual sexual behavior is often founded on the belief that sex and marriage are--and should be--inexorably linked with child-rearing...

...What constitutes a "domestic partner...

...To grant the existence of a homosexual orientation requires that there be some acceptable expression of it...

...Science now acknowledges the existence of a homosexual sexual orientation, like heterosexuality, a fundamental affectional predisposition...

...But even these can provide only a fraction of the benefits of marriage...

...And if the church sanctions such unions, a further, moral legitimacy will be granted...

...Hugging a person of the same sex...

...Gay couples have no such choice--and society also has an interest in committed, long-lasting relationships even between homosexuals...

...Unlike specific behaviors of, say, rape or incest, a homosexual's sexual behavior is the logical expression of his or her most basic, unchangeable sexual make-up...

...While psychological consensus (and compelling identical and fraternal twin studies) force us to concede that the homosexual orientation is not a choice, (nor is it subject to change), homosexual behavior definitely is a choice, very unlike race...

...One must then ask exactly where does the sin of "activity" begin anyway...

...In fact, most lesbian and gay relationships are probably far more conventional than most people think...

...How does the homosexual adolescent formulate self-esteem while being told that any expression of his or her sexuality ever is unacceptable--or downright evil...

...n one legal spouse to the other after death te taxes...

...If a couple splits up, there is the Its for adopted children or offspring consemination...

...And such an unwieldy checklist guarantees that many lesbian and gay couples will not employ even those available...

...And unlike rape and incest, necessarily manifestations of destruction and abuse, sexual behavior resulting from one's sexual orientation can be an expression of love and unity (it is the complete denial of this love--indeed, an unsettling preoccupation with genital activity--that make the inflammatory comparisons of homosexual sex to rape, incest, and alcoholism so frustrating for lesbians and gays...

...I' I urther, because the benefits of"domestic partnership" are allotted to couples without much legal responsibility--and because the advantages of domestic partnership are necessarily allowed for unmarried heterosexual partners as well as homosexual ones--domestic partnership has the unwanted consequence of weakening traditional marriage...

...Even the concept of"domestic partnership" is seriously flawed...

...Still, the legalization of gay marriage, while not making homosexual sexual behavior any more prevalent, would remove much of the stigma concerning such behavior, at least that which takes place within the confines of "marriage...

...The result would be more people living more conventional lifestyles, not more people living less conventional ones...

...In 1959, Mildred Jeter and Richard Loving, a mixed-race Virginia couple married in Washington, D.C., pleaded guilty to violating Virginia's ban on interracial marriages...

...Allow gay civil marriage...

...Surely increased stability in the relationships of lesbians and gay men could only help the gays themselves and their many millions of children...

...What a n i c e i d e a . . . . e s p e c i a l l y with reduced rat6s...

...because lesbians and gay men are physiologically incapable of creating children alone, all such sexual behavior is deemed immoral--and gays are considered unsuitable to the institution of marriage...

...it would strengthen it...

...Some suggest that legal mechanisms already exist by which lesbian and gay couples could create some of the desired protections for their relationships: power-of-attorney agreements, proxies, wills, insurance policies, and joint tenancy arrangements...

...The question is whether, in the absence of a compelling state interest, the state should be allowed to supersede the individual's choice...

...And but for the interference with his arrangements, there would be no cause for such marriages...

...But this standard is al so inconsistently applied...

...More important, easing the ban on same-sex marriage would make lesbians and gays, the vast majority of whom have not chosen celibacy, even more likely to live within longterm, committed partnerships...

...the protections and benefits are only a fraction of those resulting from marriage--and are available to only a small percentage of gays in a handful of cities (in the above-mentioned survey, considerably less than 10 percent of lesbian and gay couples were eligible for any form of shared job benefits...

...Society already has a measure of relational union--it's called marriage, and it's not at all difficult to ascertain: you're either married or you're not...

...It is simply not logical to say, as the church does, that while one's basic sexual outlook is neither chosen nor sinful, any activity taken as a result of that orientation is...

...Indeed, the compelling state interest lies in permitting gay 682: Commonweal unions...

...imilarly, there is little danger that giving legitimacy to gay marriages would undermine the legitimacy of heterosexual ones-----cause "the breakdown of the family...

...A 1990 in and gay couples found that 82 percent ad 75 percent of the female ones share all .es...

...An estimated 10 ation--about 25 million Americans--is linantly homosexual in sexual orientation, rcent of the men and about 70 percent of g-term, committed relationships...

...Just as important, gay marriage would reduce the number of closeted gays who marry heterosexual partners, as an estimated 20 percent of all gays do, in an effort to conform to social pressure--but at enormous cost to themselves, their children, and their opposite-sex spouses...

...Even apart from the practical impossibilities, what about the ramifications of such an attempt...

...But before we can talk about the proper way to get two brides or two grooms down a single church aisle, we have to first show there's an aisle wide enough to accommodate them...

...An estimated 3 to 5 million homosexuals have parented children within heterosexual relationships, and at least 1,000 children were born to lesbian or gay couples in the San Francisco area alone in just the last five years...

...The fact that he separated the races shows that he did not intend for the races to mix...

...A motion to overturn the decision was denied by two higher Virginia courts until the state's ban on interracial marriage was declared unconstitutional by the United State Supreme Court in 1967...

...In passing the sentence, the judge said, "Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, Malay, and red, and he placed them on separate continents...

...Could roommates qualify...

...You can share all this with friends of similar tastes: Send them 22 J issues of America's most prestigious Catholic magazine...

...Jeter and Loving were given a suspended jail sentence on the condition that they leave the state...