The Bootblack Stand
Plunkitt, George Washington
"The Bootblack Stand" Dr. George Washington Plunkitt, our prize-winning political analyst, is celebrating the publication of his new book, which is now available at avant-garde bookstores throughout New Jersey. Dr....
...Plunhitt expects to earn ten million dollars from sales of his new book, he has agreed to continue to advise public figures through this column...
...Morton Norton Women's Christian Temperance Union Washington, D.C...
...This explains my recent conversion to the cause of reform or welfare politics as it is cunningly called...
...Cordially, Senator William Proxmire Dear Senator Proxmire: First of all I object to your adumbration that it is improper for public officials to sup %o well" at the public trough...
...I hoped you could come up with a crafty scheme to end this foolish bit of government waste...
...Plunkitt: In your opinion has drinking become a problem in the U.S...
...For instance if the Hon...
...Plunkitt: For months now I have been attempting to eliminate lavish use of chauffeur-driven limousines by high government officials...
...The December issue of The Alternative will focus on Governor Reagan and his alternative social policies...
...He would imperil his spotless public record and the impeccable repute of the Nixon Administration...
...Otherwise, there is no problem to speak of...
...There are 789 of these gas guzzling monsters (part of the fleet of nearly half a million government owned vehicles) rumbling through Washington awaiting the whim of top government officials who sup so well at the public trough...
...Bella Abzug has overcome this problem by wearing those otherwise absurd hats and of course Senator Tunney and Senator Kennedy bring their libations in under their pillows...
...Sincerely, Mrs...
...Thus, the taxpayer gladly hands over more and more of his income to the reform boodler, the welfare state prospers, and there are plenty of limos for all...
...The only problem that I am aware of is that both representatives and senators seem to have some difficulty getting the stuff onto the house and senate floors...
...Everytime he put his paws on the steering wheel, he would attract an army of gendarmes armed with citations of public intoxication and driving under the influences...
...GWP Dear Mr...
...GWP Coming in the Next Issue Until November 6 California will be the scene of a great pother as Ronald Reagan's intriguip~, Proposition One faces the hard-pressed electorate...
...11, Box 360, Bloomington, Indiana 47401, Continental U.S.A...
...Although Dr...
...Address all correspondence to The Bootblack Stand, c/o The Establishment, R.R...
...Congress...
...Senator Proxmire, you have a great deal to learn about statesmanship...
...Supping well is what politics is all about--especially reform politics or welfare politics...
...Almost every solon I know drinks often unquenchably, nor do any of our legislators have any problem eating...
...Dear Mrs...
...Morton: It is with a great deal of satisfaction that I can assure you that rarely is drinking a problem with any members of the U.S...
...If the proposition is adopted, the California legislature will be constitutionally limited in the amount of taxes it can levy on the state's citizens and a precedent will be set for other states...
...In Washington today, a limo is not only part of the boodle for service on behalf of one's country, but it is a positive necessity for many top public servants and a health precaution for the general citizenry...
...The beauty of these advanced forms of politics is that rather than being faced with the old-fashioned reluctant taxpayer, the reform politician, through his rhetorical artistry, transforms the parsimonious taxpayer into an eager chump...
...I am having difficulty gaining support for my economic drive...
...Congress...
...Elliott Richardson had to drive himself to work in the morning, vast numbers of pedestrians would be in danger as would this distinguished public servant himself...
...Dear Mr...
...28 The Alternative November 1973...
...Plunkitt's book is about the importance of altruism in politics and it is titled What's in It for Me...
Vol. 7 • November 1973 • No. 2
