The Continuing Crisis
Tyrrell, R. Emmett Jr.
THe conTInuInG cRIsIs R. Emmett Tyrrell, Jr. July scampers off. August arrives. The Prophet Obama is everywhere. In the American outback he intones: “So what they’re going to try to do...
...Bruni sings in another song, “I give you my body, my soul, and my chrysanthemum...
...She achieved her prodigies with a secret combination of traditional herbs, Islamic prayers—presumably Islamic prayers of the peaceful sort, none of that decapitation stuff—and chutzpah...
...Bruni, but she knows nothing of herbs or Islamic prayers, and works her magic only on one man at present, the President of the Republic, M. Nicolas Sarkozy...
...Bruni is a mere beginner compared with the recently deceased Miss Erot, who has enlarged more penises than Carter has liver pills, so to speak...
...In the charming Austrian village of Eisenstadt, southeast of Vienna, Mr...
...The Prophet Obama is everywhere...
...What has the partners at Covington & Burling in extremis is that Mr...
...I heard the pipes rumbling a bit,” explained a scantily clad Mr...
...Yet Mme...
...It was a glum monthatthehigh-priced Washington, D.C...
...In one song now available throughout France she warbles, “You Are My Junk” or “You Are My Dope...
...And will he be with President Chavez during this liaison with the King...
...Late in July he was arrested near a Belgrade health food store and whisked to The Hague as Serbian nationals burned every McDonald’s restaurant they could fall on...
...I ran down the stairs with the hailstones following me, and other residents did the same...
...Miss Erot was revered throughout her native land for her preternatural capacities for enlarging men’s penises without aural, odoriferous, or even tactile stimulation...
...The editors at Ma’ariv respond that the Prophet’s earthly aides suggested to the newspaper and to other Israeli newspapers that they publish the Prophet’s prayer...
...Shiv Charan, a 74-year-old retiree, has failed his high school exams for the 38th consecutive time...
...Charan vows to continue...
...Miss Erot was an Indonesian original...
...Bierbauer, “and suddenly hailstones the size of golf balls started exploding out of the toilet like it was a popcorn machine...
...John McCain takes offense, the Prophet slams him for introducing the race issue...
...after decades of dreary reports from American public schools, members of the American Federation of Teachers have been given something really swell to cheer about...
...Possibly he has also been at work in Berkeley, California, and he may have played a role in hammering out the Prophet Obama’s health care program...
...Her device is poetry embedded in song...
...I will fulfill my commitment and continue taking the board examinations till I pass….For me, success is not merely about clearing the examinations...
...It turns out that Mr...
...Any association of sadomasochism—his “passion,” according to the New York Times—with fringe political movements could set sadomasochism back years...
...Remes, a graduate of Harvard State University Law School, has apparently broken with the firm’s long-standing tradition of wearing boxer shorts—even many of the firm’s women wear 10 THe aMeRIcan sPecTaToR sePTeMbeR 2008 R. eMMeTT TyRRell, JR...
...The dunce scored a mere 5 percent in science and could only muster a 25 percent in Sanskrit despite having spent a lifetime speaking it...
...Remes is now claiming that he was engaged in some sort of human rights demonstration on behalf of Yemeni clients being held at scenic Guantanamo...
...Throughout Indonesia, which is the world’s largest Muslim-majority country, she leaves a string of clinics that will continue her work...
...law firm of Covington & Burling, after a partner, Mr...
...In Jerusalem the Prophet becomes indignant after some fiend pilfers a written prayer that the Prophet inserted into the Wailing Wall, and the Israeli newspaper Ma’ariv publishes it...
...David Remes, was photographed in an act of public indecency at an airport in Yemen not far from the men’s lavatory...
...Mme...
...There was an unexpected twist in the 12-year international dragnet to arrest war crimes suspect and Serb poet Mr...
...In France there is Mme...
...Then she goes on to associate the president of France with “my orgy…my folly…my blessed bread, my charming prince”—the last item of which should not be confused with the similarly named condom once popular in the 1950s...
...Alvaro Uribe have in mind...
...As the weeks progress it becomes ever more apparent that this Prophet is one shrewd cookie...
...Bierbauer is demanding damages, lest the Crisis pass without remuneration...
...There was an avalanche of ice that quickly filled the toilet, then the entire flat, and eventually the entire building...
...Mosley’s father, Oswald, led the UK’s National Union of Fascists in the 1930s and in 1936 was married at the home of Herr Joseph Goebbels, the Nazi spinmeister, with Herr Hitler in attendance...
...Thus this Nazi business is a touchy subject with the silver-haired degenerate...
...sePTeMbeR 2008 THe aMeRIcan sPecTaToR 11...
...In the American outback he intones: “So what they’re going to try to do is make you scared of me...
...In fact, her heirs plan to export her clinics, possibly to Iran, beginning with the Holy City Qum, or to the United States, where they could be incorporated into Starbucks stores, which are having financial difficulties, and into Ben & Jerry’s ice cream parlors...
...It is not in my nature to change,” he averred...
...THe conTInuInG cRIsIs R. Emmett Tyrrell, Jr...
...But hold...
...He’s got a funny name.’ You know: ‘He doesn’t look like all those other presidents on the dollar bills.’” And when the campaign of Sen...
...Sacrilege,” declare the Prophet’s followers, and “invasion of privacy...
...Nonetheless Mr...
...from Indonesia comes word that the reclusive Miss Mak Erot has passed away on the western coast of Java island in the remote village of Caringin...
...boxer shorts...
...Martin Bierbauer was driven from his restroom and eventually out of his apartment after a Vesuvius of gigantic hailstones began blasting from his toilet...
...At any rate, his days of dispensing cow patties and wheat-germ enemas are over...
...There are none like her anywhere, and only in France is there a woman approaching her achievements...
...Karadzic has been wearing a Santa Claus disguise and participating exuberantly in the alternative medicine movement in greater Belgrade...
...It will also throw open the doors to marriage...
...Yet it could be worse...
...When she died, Indonesian obituaries listed her age as anywhere between 101 and 130 years and were similarly vague as to the dimensions of her enlargements...
...finally there is still more evidence in support of AmSpec’s long-held belief that we must get Mother Nature before she gets us...
...Radovan Karadzic, who is accused in the 1995 murder of 8,000 men and boys at Srebrenica...
...You know: ‘He’s not patriotic enough...
...One can imagine a light lip gloss for President Chavez when he meets the King of Spain, and he already seems to rely heavily on mascara, but what could Colombian president Sr...
...President Hugo Chavez announced his intentions to enter into an alliance with Russia and to hug the King of Spain...
...The Economist magazine also reports that “in their first meeting since their relations turned sour last autumn, the presidents of Colombia and Venezuela agreed to make up...
...London’s Daily Telegraph reports that in the Indian subcontinent Mr...
...Max Mosley, Formula One’s overseer, won his libel case against London’s News of the World for reporting that he had engaged in a sadomasochistic orgy with Nazi themes...
...Finally, the world of grand prix racing breathed a collective sigh of relief after Mr...
...Remes could have been wearing a thong...
...AmSpec readers can judge for themselves by viewing the disgusting picture nearby...
Vol. 41 • September 2008 • No. 7
