THE CONTINUING CRISIS:
Tyrrell, R. Emmett Jr.
THE CONTINUING CRISIS R. Emmet t T yrr ell, J r . July was a horrifying month. Six and a half years into the Bush Terror and finally the bien pensants of Liberalism beheld on the morning of...
...Still, Miss Wagner has offered hope that one day former President Bill Clinton will realize his artistic dream of performing in one of Wagner’s rarely seen operettas, Die Pantyhosen...
...Clinton has even experimented with the color of her eyes...
...Admittedly, the astronaut in question was preparing to take off on a Russian Soyuz spacecraft with vodka-loving cosmonauts, and there is no evidence that he neglected to R. EMMETT TYRRELL, JR...
...Okinawa has been suggested by the geographic illiterates...
...Richard E. Bachmann Jr., at least two astronauts left their quarters gently stewed as they headed off to outer space, and one was actually launched into outer space with a blood alcohol level comparable to that maintained by Miss Paris Hilton during her morning prayers...
...Brian Allison, who was lost at sea three years ago...
...The performance was accorded boos, but then again it was accorded jeers...
...Said Congressman Bart Gordon, chairman of the Science and Technology Committee, “Drinking and driving is never a good idea—least of all when the vehicle is a multi-billion-dollar space shutour troops that on the face of it are implausible...
...Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign has hit upon a fundraising tactic hitherto undreamed of by any member of the campaign, except, perhaps, by her husband...
...12 THE AMERICAN SPECTATOR SEPTEMBER 2007 What our young soldiers will do for fun remains unknown...
...Wagners’s Die Meistersinger von Nürnberg at the famed Bayreuth festival to a mixed response...
...Richard Wagner, has staged her own version of Mr...
...Nine years after the magazine’s associate editor, Mr...
...She even tried turquoise contact lenses,” I quote a Clinton insider as saying, “but it was not a great look for her...
...In Iraq, members of al Qaeda and other unruly groups continue to blow up civilians and even an occasional soldier or two, causing sheiks in at least two provinces—Anbar and Diyala—to throw in with the Coalition forces under the provision that they depart when the hostilities end...
...According to a report compiled by NASA’s Col...
...until 9:21 A.M., while erstwhile President George W. Bush was having a leisurely colonoscopy undertaken by surgeons looking for what the press called “suspicious” polyps—suspicious indeed...
...We do know that Mrs...
...In response to a Washington Post journalist’s report that Senator Clinton appeared on the floor of the Senate with her bosom partially exposed, Clinton adviser Miss Ann Lewis sent out a fundraising appeal referring to the report as “grossly inappropriate” and asking that checks be sent immediately...
...It was a difficult month for former vice president alGore and for the newly elected prime minister of Belgium, M. Yves Leterme...
...Obviously the White House colonoscopy has become a favorite Republican dirty trick...
...That makes them more reasonable than the leaders of the Democratic Party...
...From Germany comes word that 29-year-old Miss Katrina Wagner, the great-granddaughter of the late Mr...
...When will Americans wake up...
...Now it is going to take the American Civil Liberties Union years to remove the unsightly blemishes surreptitiously imposed on our Bill of Rights while the former president was off with his spelunking surgeons...
...Clinton has had extensive repairs made to her face, and in The Clinton Crack-Up I have recently recounted that Mrs...
...Camp Gitmo is going to lose all of its charm...
...But he has vouchsafed no evidence supporting his stories, and military observers have written both the Weekly Standard and AmSpec saying in polite language that he is a hansdoodle...
...Vice President Richard Cheney became President of the United States...
...Stephen Glass, was caught interlarding fiction into two-thirds of the 41 nonsensical articles he had published in the magazine, its anonymous “Baghdad Diarist” has been accused of describing atrocities by idea—least of all when the vehicle is a multi-billion-dollar space shuttle...
...France continues to move forward under its new conservative president, M. Nicolas Sarkozy...
...Our deipnophobic President’s popularity sank to 29 percent, only 2 percent higher than the Democratic Congress...
...This move was much needed,” asseverated M. Jean-Marc Peillex, a local mayor...
...Apparently NASA’s effort to give our astronauts’ crew quarters a comfortable night club-like setting prior to flights has backfired...
...Said he, “I have much more important things to do than this crap...
...Scott Thomas Beauchamp, a “Drinking and driving is never a good tle...
...They tried it during the Reagan administration...
...At this writing Mr...
...al-Gore’s worldwide Live Earth concerts were a bust, and at a wedding reception for his daughter held in his adopted city, Beverly Hills, he was caught serving sea bass, recognized by environmentalists everywhere as an endangered fish...
...The fabled “Fact Checkers” of the New Republic are again under fire...
...Finally, there is this heartwarming story from the British fishing village of North Shields in North Tyneside...
...SEPTEMBER 2007 THE AMERICAN SPECTATOR 13...
...He and his Halliburton cronies ruled America and the entire Free World from 7:16 A.M...
...member of Alpha Company of the Army 1st Division’s 2nd Brigade Combat Team based at Forward Operating Base Falcon...
...Bush’s séance...
...The dirty-minded Miss Wagner’s production featured nude singers, some with giant phalluses, and her distinguished ancestor dancing onstage in his undergarments...
...Who knows how many unethical government contracts were perpetrated during Mr...
...Now apparently the Clintons are raising funds for more elaborate alterations...
...At least he had a classy riposte for the derisive scribes...
...As for M. Leterme, when asked by television reporters if he could sing the Belgian national anthem, he sang the wrong song, namely the French anthem, “La Marseillaise...
...But members of Congress are apprehensive...
...She started experimenting with different blazing blue colors at the White House...
...Six and a half years into the Bush Terror and finally the bien pensants of Liberalism beheld on the morning of July 21 their worst nightmare...
...Nor is this the first attempted coup by colonoscopy undertaken by Republicans...
...Sen...
...July witnessed persistent attempts by Capitol Hill Democrats to schedule a brisk retreat from Iraq while repositioning our forces nearby...
...The day before, on July 20, President Bush signed an executive order banning the CIA from exposing suspected terrorists to “outrages upon personal dignity, in particular humiliating and degrading treatment...
...That human skull that Mr...
...Precisely what the checks will be spent on remains subject to controversy...
...Perhaps if he were to become more sociable at vesper time, Official Washington would go easier on him...
...Harsh language is to be prohibited in the interrogation room, as well as yodeling, nose blowing, and impolite burping...
...Thirty thousand visitors traipse to the top of Mont Blanc annually, and, said M. Peillex, “our beautiful mountain’s white peak was full of yellow and brown spots in summer...
...Possibly even water boarding will be banned...
...The campaign is exploiting the former first lady’s breasts, a part of her anatomy that has received little mention until now...
...Barry Hunter found in his trawler’s net proved to be that of his fellow fisherman Mr...
...No longer will our interrogators be allowed to drape a suspect’s head in lingerie or even a sombrero...
...Yet what better way to ingratiate our space pioneers to their Russian crewmates than by knocking back a few stout drinks in the lovely ambience of Club Astro, where conversation is easy, the music lively, and doubtless No Smoking signs abound...
...King will ask evocative questions...
...By month’s end the sorely pressed Diarist had identified himself as young Mr...
...Hunter has yet to be invited on the Larry King Live television show, but when he is you can be sure an earnest Mr...
...In July it placed two toilets (hommes and femmes) atop Mont Blanc, earning for France the reputation of having the two highest toilets in Europe (4,260 meters...
...use his seatbelt...
Vol. 40 • September 2007 • No. 7
