BEN STEIN'S DIARY: Making Memories
Stein, Benjamin J.
ERE I AM IN LAS VEGAS. I am in a spectacular room attheWynnhotel.I'mgearinguptogiveaspeech totheEquipmentDistributors.Theroomislovely. Great view, high ceilings, gorgeous furniture, but loud...
...He's super smart and quite funny...
...After my speech, my panel discussion,andmylunch,Ipackedandrushedofftotheairport...
...But policy based on envy is a stone solid disaster waiting to happen...
...There'sasongI'vebeenlisteningtoalotlatelyby Loretta Lynn that sums it up...
...I have to like that, and I do...
...He discovered what really made the ordinary American angry and what madehimexhilaratedlongbeforeNixondidorReagan didorCarterorClintondid...
...I have a love affair with that car and I don't expect love affairs to be perfect...
...Then adisaster,RockyBalboa,whichwasnotevencloseto being worth watching, then a documentary about World War II called The Ritchie Boys, which was slow but touching...
...Off the plane, into my car, and back home to the dogs and cats...
...I doubt if I will ever go to anotherdealerforacar.Anyway,now,it'srunninglike a gem...
...It's easy...
...I begged him to make a copy and send it my way...
...IfwegotoutofIraqandspentthemoneyonantiterrorworkhereathome,wewouldbeincomparably safer than the way we're going now...
...Yes,globalwarming.That'swhat'smakingitsodamned cold...
...They're not doing anything wrong...
...Adolescent oppositional disorder...
...It's been record cold for about a month...
...Wifey and our son are out at a race car mechanics' school Tommy is looking at in Sonoma...
...We rode back under the stars to his lavish condoinSanMateo,andwetalkedabouthowfasttime isgoingby...
...I think these are abouttheprettiestwomenIhaveeverspokento...
...Why do Jews even consider, even remotely consider, voting for a party that's not as strong for Israel as Bush'sGOP?Yettheyvotedsomethinglike85percent Democratinthe2006elections.Why?It'supsetting...
...One very tall man said, "He's just sort of like an ordinary person," and his wife added, "Only a lot nicer...
...Hatred of those we need and depend on...
...It really brings tearstomyeyes.Thedealer,JessupinCathedralCity, also showed care and compassion and skill...
...One man told me he had a signed photo of George Wallace with Elvis Presley...
...I am not sure I have these lyrics right...
...That's John Coyne's brilliant phrase...
...Well, how do you think Ike would have felt about it...
...Then at night going to the movies with wifey...
...Maybe I'm wrong about it all...
...Anyway, I shook hands with about 200 men and women, had my picture taken, and got a kind compliment from a small group as I walked away...
...On the one hand, people usually get paid very roughly what they are worth(asmynewpalYaronsays).Ontheotherhand, thisisaterriblyrichcountry.It'suglytoseemembers of the Armed Forces paid as modestly as they are when the waiting list for Ferraris and yachts and Gulfstreams is measured in years...
...I watched the news for a while.Bushhashimselfinsuchatightcornerit'struly unbelievable.Idon'tseehowthistroopsurgewilldoa darnedthingexceptgetmoreAmericanskilled.We're in the position now where we are basically sending men to die to help the Iraqis defend themselves against themselves...
...Except envy and adolescent frustration (again...
...I hope he does...
...They fixed everything...
...Two scary-looking hookers solicited me but I just went to my room,ordered a club sandwich, and read the newspapers and my biography of Wallace...
...Ben Stein is a writer, actor, economist, and lawyer in Beverly Hills and Malibu.B E N J A M I NJ .S T E I N M A R C H 2 0 0 7 T H E A M E R I C A N S P E C T A T O R 6 5 UpdatedAsWeSpeak...
...www.spectator.orgAmSpecBlog...
...Al is really a dearsoulandhasbeenmybestfriendforalongtimenow...
...What's this all about...
...Why do we hate them so much...
...I walked hurriedly through the forest towards McHenry Library, but, to my total shock, it was closed...
...He said it with a smile, and I'm paraphrasing, but I thought it was funny...
...The GOP in Congress was totally loyal...
...Anyway, I got back to the Wynn...
...THURSDAY UPINTHEMORNINGandouttoschool.Wait,no,that was40yearsago.Now,it'supinthemorningto speak to some well-to-do young people from North and South Carolina who are in Vegas with the YoungPresidentsOrganization.TheseguyshaveVERY, VERY GOOD-LOOKING wives...
...Just swimminginmyfabulouspoolinRanchoMirage,lookingup atthestars,watchingthecoldstarsfaraway,watching thesteamriseasIpaddleawayatthewater.Thenlying inbedwithmydogsandthefireplacegoing,andwatchingthepalmtreeswhiparoundinthewindandthefire outlineofmyBrigid'snoblehead...
...I read the newspapers about the endless bashing of the oil companies by the Democrats...
...See what daily insight from R. Emmett Tyrrell, Jr...
...Then make new memories," he said...
...Give Israel a Trident submarine...
...Great looking Southern belles...
...Plus: mysterious guest bloggers...
...In my whole life, I have never had any professional peopleshowasmuchconcernformeasGM'sCadillac Division has shown about my STS-V...
...It's all way above my pay grade...
...I wish Mr...
...There are a lot of people here from Kansas and Oklahoma and Massachusetts and Texas and Oregon andeverywhereyoucanthinkof.Ifellintoalongconversation with a man from Tuscaloosa, Alabama...
...Thehardbuttruefactisthatifwesomehowslow down markedly the flow of oil into this country, we will hurt ourselves far worse than al Qaeda even dreamed of...
...Wow,thosekidsnextdoorarenoisy.Fourcallsto security and they're finally calming down, but it's beenanightmare.Thisiswhytravelissotaxing.Rude people.Nomorecomplexthanthat.Butnowjustthis second, they're being quiet...
...Global warming...
...I have never had a dealer as good...
...Oh, well...
...There are some very good Democrats on this issue, but overall, the party is ambivalent about Israel.BarackObamaisatbestequivocalaboutIsrael...
...Global warming...
...What would we do if the oil companies stopped hunting for oil, finding it, drilling for it, pumping it out, refining it, and selling it to us...
...I just finished watching Bush's State of the Union...
...People who go to church don't like getting pushedaroundbyatheistsandtheACLU.Wallacewas a stone racist, and this was a terrible thing, unequivocally...
...Then the steeringbrokeagain.Thenwhiletheywerefixingthat,thepeopleatthedealershipcrashedthecarintoawall...
...I don't think so...
...I sure hope he likes it...
...IguessthisisasignthatI'mgrowingold,butthenIam growing old...
...Well," he said, "how would you like to live with five million Jews, all in your face, all in your business all the time...
...Then,twodaysaftertheyreturnedit,ithadafuelinjectionmalfunction...
...Well, enough of that...
...VERY...
...So was the path that leads from there to the Performing Arts Center...
...It is still cold here...
...gets quoted by the who's who in Washington and talk radio...
...I'll look them up and check them out on the 'net...
...Bomb the Iranian nuclear facilities...
...It's great...
...Isthisright?Inanationwith130,000people who collectively make as much as 120 million other Americans...
...I signed many autographs and posed for many photos.Oneterriblydrunkwomankepttryingtokiss me.Finallyherhusbandledheraway,thankheavens...
...After my speech, we had a panel discussion inB E N J A M I NJ .S T E I N M A R C H 2 0 0 7 T H E A M E R I C A N S P E C T A T O R 6 3 B E NS T E I N ' SD I A R Y 6 4 T H E A M E R I C A N S P E C T A T O R M A R C H 2 0 0 7 volvingmoiandasmartguynamedYaronBrook.He's an Israeli who wisely moved to America...
...The good people at Cadillac were all over the problem...
...Andlet'snothatethemjustbecauseweneedthem...
...Anyway,here'smyStateoftheUnion:IfIhavemy wifey and my dogs, I'm great...
...Unimaginably exciting...
...After the discussion we had lunch and I asked him why he moved from Israel to Orange County...
...I guess this shows I am a Communist...
...Then just leave the whole area to its ownnuttyinhabitants...
...They supply us with a vital commodity...
...Casino Royale has the best action sequence I have ever seen in the first 15 minutes...
...Not many of us remember that Pat McCarran was a devout antiCommunistandgreatpalofRichardNixon.Nowit'sa pleasant place in the new terminals and an absolute hellhole in the America West terminals...
...TUESDAY IAM BACK IN L.A...
...Thatplaceisnowroughlyfivetimesasdenselypopulated as it was when I was there...
...Soon,allwe'llhaveismemories,"Isaid...
...It'skillingAmericansandIraqis.It'smaimingAmericans and Iraqis...
...Anyway, then onto my plane, off to dreamland, and awakening in Los Angeles...
...If I have my perfect wifey and my dogs and live in America the life I live, I am the luckiest man on the planet...
...They're a hale and hearty group of men and women who distribute cranes and backhoes and ditch witches and other equipment all over the country...
...And I don't like us running big deficits (or even small deficits) in a period of high prosperity.Idislikehightaxesasmuchasanyone,but with 130,000 high-income people here earning as much in total as the bottom 120 million people, maybe those 130,000 people should pay enough in taxestohelpthepoorestamongushavefood,shelter, and adequate medical care...
...I've gotten to love being down in Rancho Mirage...
...Find out what the Washington Prowler has uncovered...
...But when they're good,they'regreat.Thatcargoes120asifit'sstanding still...
...ANYWAY, OFF TO DO AN INTERVIEW with NPR's "All ThingsConsidered"aboutincomeandwealth inequality in America...
...I love Mr...
...It's the perfect freewaycar.IfIhadenoughgaragespace,Iwouldbuy more of them...
...Webb is right that there is terrible income inequality, andIhateit.Butit'snotBush'sfault,isit?Well,ifitis,it's onlyalittlebithisfault.Peoplearejustnotequalintheir abilities.It'snotthatcomplicated...
...Great view, high ceilings, gorgeous furniture, but loud young kids next door are driving me crazyandIdon'thavetimetomove.Iambackat workafteraboutamonthoff.Itwasgreat.Noairports, no noisy hotel rooms, no rude hotel clerks...
...It's a shame, but there's not a thing I can do about it...
...He was good and I thought the speech was superb...
...Maybe they've all passed out...
...Thisbringsmetooneofmyobsessions:Whydon't all Jews vote GOP all of the time...
...They sent engineers out from Lansing to study the car and re-program it...
...Senator Webb's speechwasgood,inresponse,butwasextremelyvague...
...Bush would understand that the manlythingtodonowistobelikeDeGaulleandgetout ofanunwinnablesituation.That'swhatEisenhoweror Reagan or Nixon or even Churchill would do...
...What's wrong with us...
...Hard-working people do not like getting pushed around by criminals...
...It was simple: People do not like getting pushed around...
...I was in San Francisco over the weekend.IgaveaspeechonSaturday,thenpicked up my pal Al Burton in San Mateo...
...I could see the same fabulous stars I saw there in August 1972 when I first moved thereandfellinlovewiththeplace.Ireallydoubtthat there is any place I love more than the courtyard of PorterCollege,UniversityofCaliforniaatSantaCruz...
...It goes something like this, They say, to get her hair done, Liz flies all the way to France, And Jackie's seen in a discotheque, doin' a brand new dance, And the White House social season should be glittering and gay, But here in Topeka, the faucet is a drippin', The coffee is a boilin' and the roof is a leakin' One baby's crawlin and one baby's toddlin' And, Lord, one's on the way...
...Nahh, you look them up...
...Few students were about, but the ones who were there were cheery and energetic...
...They fixed that...
...I can pass anything on the road...
...People who pay their taxes don't like getting pushed around by welfare queens...
...I guess it has to do with the endless construction on campus...
...It's agonizing,butit'sevenmoreagonizingtobethere.Getout...
...Then, off we wenttoSantaCruztohikearound.Itwasbitterlycold but the sky was clear...
...It's costing us a stone fortune we badly need for Medicare and defense...
...Nothing rational at all that I can It'suglytoseemembersoftheArmed Forcespaidasmodestlyastheyarewhen thewaitinglistforFerrarisandyachtsand Gulfstreamsismeasuredinyears...
...Bush is the most pro-Israel president there has everbeen.HeissosolidwithEretzIsraelit'sjustmagnificent...
...Bush likeayoungerbrother.Imean,Ireallylovehiminmy heart, but he's got to get us out of there...
...But he was not really talking about race...
...Let'sworkwiththeoilcompanies,notagainstthem...
...To want to hurt the oil companies is like wantingtohurtouraortaorourkidneys.Theoilcompanies are as vital to the nation as the aorta and kidneysaretothebody.Thereissimplynothingrational that can explain it...
...He was talking about condescension and contempt shown to the"greatsilentmajority"(asPatBuchananputit)by thecriminals,thecheats,andthebeautifulpeople...
...Regular appearances by Jed Babbin Philip Klein Paul Beston Lawrence Henry Enemy Central Dave Holman Shawn Macomber Quin Hillyer John Tabin and of course, Wlady...
...Why do we hate them...
...Twenty thousand men is just a drop in the bucket in a violent nation of more than 25 million the sizeofCalifornia.Let'sjustdeclarevictory,bringthose noble, gallant troops home, and concentrate on rebuildingtheArmedForcesafterthisgruelingwar...
...I think she wrote it in 1962, when the BP's were all worshipping the Kennedy glamour while the ordinary Joes and Janes werefightingjusttokeeptheirheadsabovewater.It's called "One's On The Way...
...We saw The Queen, which was magnificently good, The Last King of Scotland, which was terrifying, but good...
...The Cadillac people thankedmeandpromptlymysteeringbroke.LuckilyI was in front of my house...
...Stands up for Israel all of the time...
...I think voters sensed that Wallace really was tough andfearlessandtheyrespectedthat.Yes,again,aracist and that's unforgivable, but wow, did he understandAmerica.Wow,didheunderstandtheordinary workingmanandwoman.Ifhehadnotbeenshot,he would have been president sooner or later...
...The Democrats...
...Anyway,thatwasSaturdaynight.Nowit'sTuesday night and I am at our house in Malibu...
...Really great looking...
...It's called Pat McCarran airport...
...People dislike Bush because he's trying to give the appearance of strength but he's not really tough...
...The slot machinesmakeawfulnoisesendlessly,likemindtorture...
...I know families in the Army who cannot afford toys for their kids and volunteer for combat so they canmakeenoughmoneytobuyfurniture...
...But should this be made a matter of high policy...
...think of...
...I had an adventure with my Cadillac STS-V that's worthnoting.TheSTS-Visamightybeast.SuperchargedV-8with469horsepower.Itgoeslikearocketship.I loveitalot.IloveitsomuchIdidacommentaryoniton my bit on CBS Sunday Morning...
...He and I talked about George Wallace...
...Al waited for me patiently at Sluggo's Coffee Shop at Porter...
...Pelosi was extremely polite and encouraging.Shedidseemtobechewingabetelnutor something, but I like her anyway...
...Thenwritinginthemorningandafternoon,hitting golf balls with my new set of irons (hitting them very poorly but still hitting them), practicing putting, smelling the cut grass...
...The same reason teens hate their parents...
...It's destroying families...
...Thegatewaspackedwithextremelylargepeople, many of whom wanted my autograph...
...It's fine with me thattherearesomanyrichpeople.Ijustwantthemto pay enough in taxes so soldiers can live a solidly middle-class lifestyle...
...I don't thinkso.IconsidermyselfanEisenhowerRepublicanand I think Ike would have abhorred so much wealth among so much economic insecurity for so many decent people--especially people wearing the uniform...
...I have ambivalent feelings on this whole subject of income inequality...
...My driver got terribly, horriblylost,butfinallywefoundthestudioandstarted the discussion...
...I'm reading a fine bookabouthimcalledWallacebyMarshallFrady.Itis aboutaswellwrittenabiographyasIhaveeverread.I 6 2 T H E A M E R I C A N S P E C T A T O R M A R C H 2 0 0 7 B E NS T E I N ' SD I A R Y Making Memories by Benjamin J. Stein W E D N E S D A Y H am just fascinated with Wallace...
...Our whole society would crumble into ashes...
...They really set me up and I gave my speech with gusto...
...Let's hope so...
...FOUR HOURS LATER IAMBACKFROMMYSPEECHtotheEquipmentDistributors...
Vol. 40 • March 2007 • No. 2
