The Continuing Crisis
THE CONTINUING CRISIS The Brill is gone; Al Gore goes missing; President Loco June passed from the calendar and with it two promising American journalists, both exposed as fabricators. The month...
...In Ecuador, bananas may prove to be the political salvation of former president Abdala Bucaram, known to politically involved Ecuadorans as "El Loco...
...In Harare, Zimbabwe, that country's first president, the Rev...
...Fully Secured and 21% Fixed Returns on an 18-month program...
...Glass will be invited back, though they are perfectly free to write for Salon magazine, where their fictive talents can be added to those of Mr...
...Reportedly the decorated revelers committed public urination and indecent assault on a women's comfort station...
...The American Spectator • August 1998 9...
...The dog had bitten him...
...Raymond Gubbay, a senior spokesman for the company, has urged all 120 dancers in the production to behave "like rabbits" to ensure a "passionate mood" at each performance...
...Rather he is but another charlatan at work for the Clintons' Ministry of Propaganda...
...During it Mr...
...Six journalists quoted in the piece denied the accuracy of Mr...
...It took the gifted Mr...
...Ecuadoran legislators sided with her husband...
...Maturity dates may vary...
...Brill misquoted him in their only interview...
...William Ginsburg wasn't for naught...
...Nigeria's President General Sani Abacha died of a heart attack...
...It took Miss Smith four...
...Brill will avail himself of the talents of this creative duo...
...Jack Kevorkian...
...Banana would then ask Mr...
...Some committed indecent exposure, but, as at the aforementioned state dinner, no comment on the president's conception of romance was intended...
...Alvaro Noboa, the Bill Gates of Ecuadorian Bananas, is throwing the wealth and prestige of his position behind former President Loco, and has forced a runoff in the presidential elections...
...Then, too, it is always possible that Mr...
...Confidential is put out to pasture 8 August 1998 • The American Spectator room dancing late into the sultry night...
...Dube, when the Rev...
...The National Science Foundation has awarded a $107,000 federal grant to Professor Robert S. Wyer to continue his quest for a "theory of humor elicitation...
...Simpson wore a hidden recording device...
...Banana was ensconced in the State House he would invite Mr...
...nervous about the stock market...
...Brill's forced refraction followed...
...Murray Waas, and Mr...
...Glenn Simpson of the Wall Street Journal...
...Simpson twice, but Mr...
...Lorena Bobbitt...
...Qualified With No Market Risk...
...Huntington talked them into paying him $15,000 for the worms before it was discovered that they were toothless against waste and not even very good pets...
...Finally, the Boy President left on June 24 for China...
...David Letterman...
...Gore's close friendship with the president no allegations of hanky-panky have been made...
...and, though he was immediately accused of fabricating quotes and even making up an entire interview, his job is secure...
...Jefta Dube...
...And aglimmer goes his boast of being "The Independent Voice of The Information Age...
...And apparently that gentleman who dropped his pants and fully exposed himself to President Bill Clinton during a state dinner at the White House was not attempting to impersonate the president...
...Yes, STOCK MARKET RETURNS without STOCK MARKET RISKS...
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...Another great American, Real Quiet, missed the Triple Crown by a nose, and the Detroit Red Wings won the Stanley Cup...
...The fabricated interview was supposedly with Mr...
...Simpson denies the second interview and has evidence that Mr...
...In Aztec, New Mexico, Mr...
...The disappearance lasted one minute, 41 seconds, but notwithstanding Mr...
...Earlier in the month the New Republic revealed that former prodigy Mr...
...Bananas are in the news...
...Brill's ears, and then there was his near-death experience with Mr...
...It is the professor's second government grant...
...Dube over, ply him with drink, and insist that they watch pornographic videos—or "video nasties," as they were then known...
...Shamelessly exploiting these idiots' environmentalist hysteria, Mr...
...Gore knows that her husband is a straight arrow, and besides, he has a sore back...
...Canaan Banana, faces charges from his former aide, Mr...
...The month was not, however, a complete bust for journalistic fabricators...
...He could be sentenced to twelve years' imprisonment...
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...Presumably, however, she will be barred from air travel until her condition is medically treated...
...Officials in Portsmouth, England, refuse to release the identity of a woman who was thrown three feet into the air after a toilet exploded under her at a service station...
...Legislators deposed President Loco for zany behavior that by Ecuadorian standards goes beyond the pale: dinners in the presidential palace for scantily clad rock stars and a formal presidential dinner for Mrs...
...S.E.P...
...His immediate research will be into jokes about flatulence...
...Simpson...
...I.R.A...
...As for the other fabricators, on June 18 the Boston Globe dismissed Pulitzer Prize finalist Patricia Smith for making up characters, their quotations, and presumably their interviews in four of her recent metro columns...
...Fighting broke out along the Western Wall, Judaism's holiest site in Jerusalem, after ultra-Orthodox Jews took exception to the praying style of less orthodox Jews...
...Whai wo it la yo -r n/ I a: Your Principal is...
...According to Mr...
...Michael Jordan...
...Dube, a former police inspector, is serving a ten-year sentence for murdering a constable who called him Banana's "gay wife...
...Neither Miss Smith nor Mr...
...Jonathan Broder, Mr...
...Did you know that if your funds are in the stock market, your principle is at risk...
...Clinton's proactive approach to nubile cuties...
...But now banana tycoon Mr...
...Brill thumped down a behemoth 24,000-word "exposé" of Independent Counsel Ken Starr's relationship with the press...
...In his primordial issue of Brill's Content, Mr...
...Steven Brill unveiled his new magazine for media gourmands, Brill's Content...
...Dube to engage in ballContent's prefabricated content Mr...
...Thomas Stanley Huntington pleaded no contest to charges that he duped more than a dozen lunkheads into believing that his "California Red Superworms" were suitable for breeding and could be trained to eat nuclear waste in a nearby nuclear waste repository...
...The Chicago Bulls won their sixth National Basketball Association championship led by a great American, Mr...
...Brill claimed he interviewed Mr...
...In the era of Viagra no one fears exhaustion...
...He had merely failed to button his pants properly and might not even have heard of Mr...
...What would a decline in the stock market do to your stocks, mutual funds and retirement accounts...
...Brill managed his disintegration in one...
...Halitosis and body odor might be next, then the jokes of Mr...
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...In London, officials of the National Ballet are urging dancers in the company's new production of Romeo and Juliet to make love with the utmost "licentiousness" prior to each performance...
...Glass forty-one articles to acquire his disrepute...
...Clinton Library bonds were issued in Little Rock, bereft of ratings by either Moody's or Standard & Poor's and with the inflated yield of junk bonds...
...Shocking photographs of Miss Monica Lewin-sky were published in Vanity Fair, revealing that her full immersion in the Washington restaurant scene with lawyer Mr...
...Joe Conason, if there really is such a thing as a Conason...
...Stephen Glass had made up characters, their quotations, and presumably their interviews in as many as two-thirds of the forty-one stories he wrote for the magazine...
...Ginsburg was retired from her case and may be looking for the telephone number of Dr...
...On June 16 Vice President Al Gore's Air Force Two was lost from radar screens for the second time in the month...
...Human rights was on his agenda, and arms negotiations, and questions of commerce, and —for a certitude—more fundraising...
...The Rev...
...Hockey in June...
...From the Ivory Coast comes word that a night-watchman in suburban Abidjan will not be prosecuted for taking revenge against a neighbor's dog by killing and eating it...
...About forty of New York City's firefighters capped off an afternoon award ceremony at City Hall with a drunken brawl at a Manhattan restaurant...
Vol. 31 • August 1998 • No. 8
