Current Wisdom
Jackasses, Assorted
CURRENT WISDOM Miami Herald Casual sex at the Fontainebleau Hotel, as reported by Harold of Golden Beach regarding Bill of Whitewater: In the 1992 presidential campaign, candidate Bill Clinton...
...is raking it in, often targeting teens and younger kids, and while Coca-Cola's polar bears get the attention, studies showing the negative consequences of child caffeination are virtually ignored...
...During one notorious performance at an AIDS benefit in Brixton, Bowery, who had given himself an enema before going onstage, lost control of his bowels when his corset poked him, and accidentally sprayed the audience...
...I couldn't help but notice how warm he was—he gave off such a strong feeling of goodwill—and how real...
...Then a fellow band member, Richard Tony, pushed him through a large piece of plate glass...
...Insanity can be amusing: How particularly awful to find the odious term "wheelchair-bound" in The Progressive (David Helvarg, book review, March issue...
...PETER HUGHES Monterey [FEBRUARY 27, 1998] Playboy A note of triumphalism from the otherwise increasingly decrepit playboy Hefner: The president's enemies are enemies of sex...
...If you are a kid, and would like to help, please write a letter telling why this law should be changed and send it to the National Freedom to Marry Coalition, LAMBDA, 12 Well Street, Suite 1500, New York, NY l0005...
...In an appreciative response, Mr...
...It'll stunt your growthr) These days constraints on caffeine consumption for kids and young teens are nonexistent...
...HAROLD KRONSTADT Golden Beach [MARCH 20, 1998] New Yorker The aesthetic triumphs of Mr...
...He was focused but unrushed...
...CURRENT WISDOM Miami Herald Casual sex at the Fontainebleau Hotel, as reported by Harold of Golden Beach regarding Bill of Whitewater: In the 1992 presidential campaign, candidate Bill Clinton spoke before the National Conference of Mayors at the Fontainebleau Hilton...
...presidents...
...I wore all three on the ring finger of my left hand until Dad gave me a stainless-steel Rolex watch for law school graduation...
...I think the law against two moms or two dads getting married is not fair...
...And, you know, that worked against them, to be honest, because once he died his powers grew...
...MAY1998] The Nation With ardent spirits on the run and tobacco on the ropes, the Nutrition Nazis of this illustrious intellectual review take on still more poisoners of America's Future: Anyone remember when caffeine was off-limits for children...
...Nine pairs of hands are folded serenely on the tops of their desks...
...Look at fast-food joints, convenience stores and restaurants, where many kids get up to 40 percent of their meals...
...Kids are having caffeine early and often—high-octane Mountain Dew is the preferred soda of the under-6 set—and in much bigger doses than before...
...It's common to see young children and teens downing "big gulp"-size caffeinated sodas or lining up for seconds and thirds at refillable soda stations...
...Hillary is right: There is a conservative cartel out to get the president—and anybody else who is openly sexual...
...Even though he'll never face election again, he arrives at routine presidential appearances—his hamster wheel of receptions, dinners, coffees—and his eyes roam the room for people to win over...
...How can the most-loving person ever to occupy the White House be tagged as a sexual predator...
...Now this is a frightening picture: young people who were once spirited enough to resist the oppressive, racist "educational" system in which they were imprisoned...
...It never ceases to amaze me how a handful of self-appointed protectors of our moral fabric can command the machinery of government...
...They didn't get what they wanted...
...I saw it happen when zealous prosecutors went after Lenny Bruce, when bluenoses in Cincinnati had a museum director arrested on obscenity charges for exhibiting photographs by Robert Mapplethorpe, when a fanatic like Randall Terry, founder of Operation Rescue, incites action against Barnes & Noble for selling books by David Hamilton and Jock Sturges...
...By the way, I'm not a wheelchair user, I'm legally blind...
...Caffeine Inc...
...I've gotten compliments on them for years and love telling people that they are from Dad...
...His smile has an awshucks gulp...
...It was inside Union Station, at a reception for the anniversary of the Women's Campaign Fund....I stopped to interview him, but it didn't feel like an interview so much as a conversation...
...When I turned eighteen, my gift was an emerald and diamond ring, also in the same setting...
...My friend introduced me to Mr...
...MARCH 30, 1998] San Francisco Chronicle Youthful idealism ventilated on the correspondence page of the Chronicle, journalistic voice of Young California: My name is Paige and I am 7 years old...
...ST...
...she pulled a thread from the dress and unravelled it until he was completely naked...
...I am reminded of the first time I met Bill Clinton...
...It's no wonder that many in the disabled community have given up on the left...
...Why didn't men like this ever run for president...
...When I asked a question, he asked one back...
...If he had said, 'Bomb the White House tomorrow,' there would have been ten thousand people who would have done it...
...When I looked up from my notepad, his eyes were right there, looking at mine...
...Oh my God, this fantastic feeling...
...His head is large and bristling with twice as much hair as it needs...
...I have two moms and a little sister in my family...
...In a piece he performed in Japan, with Nicola, he pretended to be a store mannequin in a red knit dress...
...MARTIN'S PRESS, 1997] Monterey County Herald A letter-to-the-editor writer surely intent on parodying the venerable Herald's ritualistically liberal line...
...APRIL 27, 1998] Esquire An omnium gatherum of rhapsodic flap-doodle about the salty dog in the White House from Martha Sherrill, a Washington reporter who had best not visit the presidential lair unchaperoned: Imagine him for a moment as he enters a room...
...He doesn't look dried up and wizened by power, unlike most world leaders, nor beaten down by seriousness...
...William R. Morrow, 318 pages, $26] New Yorker Investigative reporter Sean Lennon files his report on the historic demise of his father, John Lennon, after conferring with sources at the corner hashish emporium: "He was a countercultural revolutionary, and the government takes that kind of s--t really seriously historically," Sean said...
...now, their spirits broken, sitting at Marine-like attention, reciting the names of our first five white, male, slave-owning, war-mongering imperialist rulers, forced to do push-ups if they get a question wrong—questions, by the way, the answers to which can have no possible relevance to these young peoples' lives other than, of course, that like Pavlov's dogs they will get rewarded for behaving as the experimenter (Fernandez, a token, a paid stooge of the aforementioned system) wishes them to behave...
...And the photo shows Fernandez asking students to "name the first five U.S...
...And as a "hip" young president he stops being an authority figure—the distant blue-serge fart running the country—and is instead a rags-to-riches hero, the sort of regular guy who wears a bolo tie and cowboy boots to the Summit of Eight in Denver, the sort of guy who can stay up late at Greg Norman's house shooting the breeze, and shooting and shooting the breeze until the breeze is really all but blown out, and then, as he's saying goodnight, busts his knee on his way out the door—and turns bad knees into a media sensation, almost a craze...
...It was in the best interests of the United States to have my dad killed, definitely...
...Clinton, mentioning that I was registering new voters as Democrats...
...Can I classify it as a sexual overture...
...If it helps you to wrap your intellects around it, just think of me as glasses-bound...
...APRIL 1998] The American Spectator • June 1998 85...
...His hands are smooth and young, his finger nails as round as nickels...
...This warm gesture gave me goose bumps...
...He and I agreed that both the rings and the watch on the same hand would look gaudy, so I switched the rings to my right hand...
...In Holland, Bowery hung upside down and naked, with clothespins pinching his penis and nipples, and exclaimed, "No embarrassment at all...
...Soupy sentiments such as these, after all, have not been expressed since Hillary Rodham's Wellesley College commencement speech: "No one is doodling in Jose Fernandez's class...
...He was relaxed the way I have never seen a politician, as though he were breathing slower than everybody else....Was he really a politician...
...It is a continuing saga: A few moral charlatans—from Charles Keating to Jerry Falwell, from Ed Meese to Bill Bennett, from Pat Robertson to the Reverend Donald Wildmon —have sought to impose their will on the nation...
...PAIGE KENDALL San Anselmo [MARCH 24,1998] The Progressive Mr...
...Nothing could be more offensive, abrasive, and demeaning than finding it in a review celebrating the inclusiveness of an "Eco-Redneck...
...These megadrinks can pack a wallop...
...Sometimes it's hard to think of him anywhere but in rooms of people, always winning them over...
...The attempted character assassination of Clinton may be the final battle in this century-long culture war...
...APRIL 20, 1998] 84 June 1998 The American Spectator Let's Go Travel Guides Empiricism put to good and gaudy use out on the wild and wondrous sexual frontiers, as revealed in an indispensable travel guide for Clintonites: Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) such as gonorrhea, chlamydia, genital warts, syphilis, and herpes are a lot easier to catch and are far more common than HIV...
...from: The Life and Times of Ron Brown: A Memoir by His Daughter, by Tracey L. Brown...
...Bob Gaspari, scourge of the "shoe-bound stumblers," and tireless advocate of the, what, "free wheelers...
...If things look bad, this may be a warning sign...
...Nine backs are ramrod straight,18 feet are planted firmly on the floor, 18 eyes are staring with rapt—yes, rapt—attention at Fernandez as he lectures in front of the room...
...It is pathetic that we live in a society which gives young people such poor choices...
...Leigh Bowery, who is now food for the worms—if the worms have sufficiently strong digestive tracts: Many of his performance pieces—first with his gender-bending trio, the Quality Street Wrappers, and then with the art-rock group Minty— involved not only nudity but vomiting, urinating, or defecating...
...Thank you...
...So, I mean, f--k them...
...His shoulders are broad...
...For all your vaunted inclusiveness, you simply just don't ever see us in the landscape of humanity...
...I think lesbians and gay people who want to should be able to get married...
...BOB GASPARI Brookline, Massachusetts [APRIL 1998] The Great Books Series Miss Tracey Brown, daughter of Washington powerhouse Ron Brown, speaks of her father's spiritual bequest to her: On my seventeenth birthday, Dad gave me a sapphire and diamond ring, and for high school graduation, a ring with rubies and diamonds in the same setting...
...Isn't it about time you shoe-bound stumblers made it a point to learn something, anything, about the forty-nine million Americans with disabilities...
...Bill Clinton still has a shine...
...These pacifist revolutionaries are historically killed by the government, and anybody who thinks that Mark Chapman was just some crazy guy who killed my dad for his personal interests is insane, I think, or very naive, or hasn't thought about it clearly...
...Though hardly foolproof, it's a wise idea to actually look at your partner's genitals before you have sex...
...He was dangerous to the government...
...Clinton put his arm around my shoulder, saying: "Thank you, Harold...
Vol. 31 • June 1998 • No. 6
