Last Call: Older Men and Their Women
Taki
LAST CALL by Taki Older Men and Their Women ABOUT TEN YEARS AGO I MADE THE MISTAKE of going on the Oprah show to discuss "older men who go out with younger women." I still can't for the life of...
...MY GREAT FRIEND, THE DOMINICAN DIPLOMAT-playboysportsman Porfirio Rubirosa, married women his age for their money— including two of the richest women on earth, Barbara Hutton and Doris Duke— but spent it on the young...
...He found true bliss at last...
...Young women will put up with our wrinkles, aching joints, and thinning hair, in return for our mature delights of wisdom...
...They have some mighty good-lookers in Chicago," was the way he put it...
...The producer had lined up a few ladies who'd lost their husbands to younger women...
...Loud applause followed my false pronouncement from the mostly mature female audience...
...Bimbos are by definition young, and like most middle-aged men without class, Clinton has never outgrown them...
...Well, yes and no...
...A furtive quickie, a lonely ride in a state trooper's wagon, a vague promise of a better job, a late-night telephone call to ensure she denies, denies, denies...
...A friend of mine, Chuck Pfeiffer, an ex-Special Forces captain who won a silver star in Vietnam, helped convince me to go...
...In Monica's case, some father...
...Charlie Chaplin married Oona when he was 54 vs...
...NOBLESSE OBLIGE BEING WHAT IT IS, THERE WAS also no way to ignore those women waiting in the wings...
...Maniacal...
...He more or less told the truth, that he preferred younger women for obvious reasons, and was roundly booed as a result...
...No ifs or buts about it...
...It is part of my Greek culture...
...Aristotle, a direct ancestor, claimed the ideal age for a couple is when the man is double the woman's age plus one year...
...I BRING THIS RATHER SLEAZY PART OF MY PAST UP apropos the Draft Dodger's recent troubles with young Monica...
...Older men who make love to younger women assume a mentor's responsibility...
...But before I go on about the Draft Dodger and his "eatin ain't cheatin" philosophy, I have to declare an interest...
...IT IS COMMONPLACE THAT MANY YOUNG GIRLS TURN to older men in what shrinks call a quest for their lost fathers...
...Asquith, Andres Segovia...
...Even his sex drive is based on a lie...
...They were mentors as well as seducers...
...They treated women with respect, and younger women with particular care and attention...
...Bill Clinton has not only made a joke of his marriage vows, he has managed to turn seduction into something vile...
...I have pursued younger women all my life, and even now, at age 6i, continue to do so...
...They have learned the hundred little courtesies that make her happy as a woman...
...ONE OF THE FEW INTELLIGENT THINGS LAUREN Bacall ever said was about older men...
...The old chestnut about "better to be an old man's darling than a young man's slave" has a ring of truth...
...For this alone he deserves contempt...
...Older men tend to have more time on their hands...
...It is a truth universally acknowledged that when a 50-year-old trailer park devotee assumes the highest office in the land, he will be in need of more and more bimbos...
...But as soon as we arrived at the studio I knew we were in trouble...
...Wit and gentlemanly behavior are as alien to it as gallantry in battle is to Bill Clinton...
...Nowadays, when no man is a hero to his wife, the starry-eyed adoration of a bright young thing is the perfect antidote to the bruised middle-aged ego...
...The list is endless...
...It was not our finest hour...
...Which brings me to our numero uno Humbert Humbert, the Draft Dodger himself...
...The other side of the coin is about renewal, emotional and physical...
...Disreputably Freudian...
...Since there was no way I would go on with "victims," a compromise was reached: Chuck and I would come on first, and the victims would follow after our departure...
...SO WHAT ABOUT MIDDLE-AGED MEN AND YOUNGER women...
...The Draft Dodger's younger women—and they are many—have received none of that...
...Dropping one's trousers in front of a woman, especially a young impressionable one, does not seem to me as showing any courtesy toward the fair sex...
...Ditto Bing Crosby, T.S...
...Older men who are gentlemen, that is, and no one as yet has accused Bill Clinton of that...
...The invaluable education, both intellectual and sexual, that older men traditionally provide does not exist where Clinton and his bimbos are concerned...
...Ergo, I spiked my drink, so to speak...
...He and his friends My Khan and Errol Flynn were lovable rogues who chased after much younger women, but all three had one thing in common...
...They are more indulgent...
...Is it against nature...
...No self-respecting mature lady would go out with a predatory playboy such as myself," I banged on, "only silly and inexperienced ones...
...I love them for their experience, the books they have read, the worlds they have seen...
...It's more like "down on your knees, fix your make-up, deny, deny, deny...
...Especially those who marry the youngsters...
...Not all fifty-something men who pursue younger women are Lolita-chasing Humberts...
...OifI 86 April 1998 • The American Spectator...
...But as my father told me, Old An had it wrong...
...Eliot, Pablo Picasso, Herbert von Karajan, Man Clark, H.H...
...her i8 years...
...The show is for freaks, social cripples, and psychopaths...
...I still can't for the life of me comprehend why I did it...
...Pfeiffer wasn't so lucky...
...The ideal is double plus seven...
Vol. 31 • April 1998 • No. 4
