The Road Ahead
Gates, Bill
BOOKS IN REVIEW - "The Road Ahead" Chipper Bore by Bill Gates with Nathan Myhrvold and Peter Rinearson Viking /286 pages / $29.95 REVIEWED BY Joe Queenan Throughout its history, America has given...
...Now give me all your money...
...coy ASC Order Toll-free now...
...These fascinating personal accounts are packed with biblical, historical, and theological proofs for Catholicism...
...In this sense, this book is a classic Bill Gates enterprise: an unoriginal, decidedly inferior product decked out with all kinds of bells and whistles to disguise the44 Though he would dearly like to think of himself as a visionary, Bill Gates's talent has always been marketing, not technology...
...call up an image of Seurat's painting, and maybe click on to a few Rembrandts while you're at it...
...This is typical Bill Gates: Vicarious experiences are better than real ones, because vicarious experiences involve Microsoft products, whereas real experiences involve market-neutral entities like human beings...
...Or die of hunger, you pathetic loser...
...Of course, it is idiotic to suggest that looking at a painting on a computer screen bears any relationship to looking at the real thing...
...I care...
...Or you could mark the scene and return to it later...
...Not even Trump pushed it this far...
...The latest raging egomaniac to win America's affection by impersonating jes' plain folks is Bill Gates, founder of Microsoft Corporation and the wealthiest man in the United States...
...Naturally, the book has a strong Buck Rogers flavor...
...I want to know why so many are converting to the Catholic Church...
...So ditch the sweater and the penny loafers and get yourself a suit and tie...
...On the cover, standing at the edge of a ribbon of highway that seems to stretch forever, hands in his pockets, attired in a sweater that comes JOE QUEENAN'S most recent book is The Unkindest Cut: How a Hatchet-Man Critic Made His Own $7,000 Movie and Put It All on His Credit Card (Hyperion...
...Now, that's handy...
...But many of the people buying this book will not own a computer of such recent vintage and for them the CD-ROM will be completely useless...
...I enclose a check or money order for $17 (U.S...
...The CD-ROM, which is a whole lot more interesting than the hook, can only be played by people who own a 486 computer with a fair amount of memory...
...All things considered, The Road Ahead is a big tease...
...Surprised by Truth...
...I'm an average guy...
...If a movie has a scene filmed in a resort hotel you'll be able to find out where it's located, check — room rates, 62 February 199 6 • The American Spectator and make reservations...
...If I had to get rid of every book in my store and carry just one, it'd be Surprised by Truth hands down...
...directly from the House of Ozzie, is the Ubertwerp himself...
...He has one basic talent: He knows how to move the merchandise...
...Hey, I'm just like one of you," that sweater beams...
...So you'll punch 'em up on your car computer...
...But that's the sort of world that Gates and his legion of megageeks are leading us toward...
...Though he would dearly like to think of himself as a visionary, Bill Gates's talent has always been marketing, not technology...
...The genius of Microsoft has never been to arrive at the cutting edge before its competitors, but to convince its customers that it has: Witness the triumph of Windows over Apple's vastly superior operating system...
...Their pursuit of Christ and their study of the Bible and Church history led them to the place they least expected...
...Though billed as Gates's personal vision of the electronic future, The Road Ahead is basically 286 pages of shilling for Microsoft and the Internet...
...The previously reclusive Gates has of late been making public appearances everywhere, in part to hype his massively overrated Windows '95 software, in part to sell copies of his book The Road Ahead...
...Chinese restaurants being such upscale operations, they'll naturally be listed in a computer database of every Chinese restaurant in the solar system...
...With the aid of the database Gates already owns, you'll be able to...
...Consider this Gates prognostication: If you are watching the movie Top Gun and think Tom Cruise's aviator glasses look really cool, you'll be able to pause the movie and learn about the glasses or even buy them on the spot...
...Each year thousands of atheists, Evangelicals, Fundamentalists, and others are being surprised by Catholic truth, and these converts tell you why...
...Or legs say you want to see a famous painting by Seurat, but you don't feel like flying all the way to Paris...
...In fact, it is not a book at all...
...BOOKS IN REVIEW Chipper Bore The Road Ahead by Bill Gates with Nathan Myhrvold and Peter Rinearson Viking /286 pages / $29.95 REVIEWED BY Joe Queenan Throughout its history, America has given its heart to one fake populist after another, always ending up ravished and humiliated, always falling for the next con artist...
...A recent list of charismatic rats who briefly won America's affection by masquerading as champions of the common man would include Boone Pickens, Lee Iacocca, Donald Trump, and Ross Perot...
...Gates would like to think of himself as Johann Gutenberg or Thomas Edison...
...Basilica Press, P.O...
...It is 286 pages of distractions from the real question: How is the information highway going to make life easier for anyone other than people who already have easy lives...
...On the subject of utter self-infatuation and contempt for the public, it should be noted that The Road Ahead even contains a chapter describing Gates's new house, complete with computer renderings of the view from the northwest across Lake Washington and the view from the staircase into the formal dining room...
...134, Son Diego, CA Send my postpaid copy of only...
...The Road Ahead is not a good book...
...i!' ADE THEM DO IT Itattlirek ok.4 FOREWORD BY SCOTT HAHN SURPRISED BY TRUTH Surprised by Truth, this year's smash best-seller, introduces you to 11 recent converts to Catholicism, including ordained ministers in evangelical denominations...
...all were ultimately unmasked as self-serving mandarins who secretly loathe the hoi polloi...
...But he's really just a hi-tech Ray Kroc...
...Let's say you're driving through an unfamiliar neighborhood in the year 2004 and you want to know which Chinese restaurants are still open...
...All rode a massive wave of popular acclaim to a brief moment of glory...
...This is the equivalent of including a portion of ham and a slice of cheese with a book as a temptation to the reader to go out and buy a loaf of bread if he wants to eat a sandwich...
...It is a catalogue describing various products and services that Microsoft will be hawking in the near future...
...Call with your credit card 800.879'4214 VISA, MASTERCARD, AMEX, DISCOVER ACCEPTED...
...The photo is the work of Annie Leibovitz, Vanity Fair's Diane Arbus, who probably borrowed one of Jimmy Carter's sweaters for the shoot...
...Box 85152, Dept...
...The most important of these bells and whistles is the CD-ROM that accompanies the book...
...Oh yes, the technical term for this stuff is progress...
...I understand my book 92186 NAME STREET ADDRESS APT...
...This is one area where the British aristocracy has it all over us: If you've got the $14 billion, you really ought to dress like it...
...Everyone loves it...
...What are you, still in high school...
...funds will be sent by priority mail...
...7 fact that it's already somewhat old hat...
...David Wilder Auburn, New York 11 Converts Give the Biblical and Historical Reasons for Becoming Catholic iNtadrid Yes...
...Its the best tool I know of for sharing the Catholic faith...
...If the star carries a handsome leather briefcase or handbag, the highway will let you browse the manufacturer's entire line of leather goods and either order one or be directed to a convenient retailer...
...Reading this encyclopedia of hype is like being trapped in a storm where a cretin keeps coming on the loudspeaker to say, "Attention, Shoppers" every thirty seconds...
...I want to make your future work...
...all published unreadable, ghost-written, best-selling books that are now about as relevant as the 1956 Oshkosh Yellow Pages...
Vol. 29 • February 1996 • No. 2
