The Continuing Crisis
• With February came the presidential primaries, and with the primaries came a tortured press corps and an absolutely frolicsome challenge to President George Herbert Walker Bush, whose only alibi...
...Julia Child, the laughing TV cook, and her fellow directors at the American Institute of Wine and Food are being sued by Mr...
...Later, members of the country's main opposition rioted, provoking mass arrests and the jugging of chief opposition leader Mr...
...Speech...
...Jackson that "his communication talents are lacking...
...Daniel Coulter, who charges that he was passed over for the post of executive director of the venerable AIWF because he is an avowed poofter and consumer of pillows...
...On February 14 in Abidjan, Ivory Coast, riot police clubbed, whipped, and tear-gassed the singer's screaming fans...
...The 1992 Miss USA pageant was won in Wichita, Kansas, by the calypygian Miss Shannon La Rhea Marketic, 21, after she responded so artfully to the query, "What kind of man would you like to many...
...Brown is the retired mechanic from London, England, who would obviate the dangers of silicone with his beautifully designed water-filled brassiere...
...If that doesn't cure them, they might as well give it up and go shopping for panty hose...
...Advocates of term limitation can look to Yarrow Point, Washington, for hope...
...Just reading about all that thumpin' and whinin' and cryin' by a bunch of goofy girly-men gave me the willies...
...Chino Williams, the Pennsylvania State University student who in the campus paper, Daily Collegian, told it like it is, calling whites "devils" and "irredeemable racists," and urging fellow fuliginous students to "unite, organize and execute" students who appear threatening...
...Bendaria was a (continued on page 14) CORRESPONDENCE 12 The American Spectator April 1992...
...Sensitive Ivorians believed that the gesture was meant to indicate the prodigy's displeasure with the Ivory Coast's general stench...
...In education news, Malaysian drug addicts in the northeastern states of Kelantan and Terengganu, who have been experiencing a shortage of heroin and marijuana for months, have found a splendid substitute "high," to wit, inhaling the methane and other natural gases that seep from fresh cow excrement...
...Editorialists from the fragrant offices of the daily newspaper Fratemite Matin struck back, remarking of Mr...
...Yet is it politically correct to be JFK today, and how is one to respond to Boy Clinton's evasion of the draft...
...Laurent Gbagbo, a Jackson supporter and strong advocate of deodorant...
...The honey-voiced Mr...
...What pains the press corps as it trundles across America in the wake of all these would-be Messiahs is that its consensus journalists sense that a fast-talking Snopes from Arkansas could be as much fun as JFK, namely, Boy Clinton...
...To which Mr...
...As a young lawyer who has devoted his career to public service, John deserves better than to be the target of a cheap and false shot from the press...
...What those guys need is a weekend of John Wayne movies followed by eight weeks in boot camp at Quantico...
...That is forgivable...
...We also know that John, like every other member of the subcommittee staff, never saw or had any access to either Anita Hill's statement or the FBI report prior to the publication of the press accounts on October 6, 1991...
...The other is the incredible amount of obscene words...
...Pat Buchanan is having a ball...
...He is a hard-working, dedicated, and conscientious member of the staff and has the full confidence and respect of his colleagues...
...He has worked for more than five years as staff counsel to the Subcommittee on the Constitution of the Judiciary Committee of the United States Senate...
...None, however, laid down more eloquent last words...
...Garrett's distinction have been officially dispatched to hell, forty-four in progressive Texas...
...and former head of the Nicaraguan government's foreign ministry...
...He is the leader of Peru's Constitutional Integrationist Movement, which calls upon the United States to annex Peru...
...Then, according to Deputy Interior Minister Hon...
...At the United Nations, where once Third World animalia growled and Lenin's heirs inveighed, President Boris Yeltsin orated on behalf of more drastic nuclear disarmament and the commingling of American and Russian strategic defense technologies into a "Star Wars" system surpassing even the optimistic visions of President Ronald Reagan...
...Then there is the Republican race...
...There is the politics of hope...
...Mahogany is a very dark wood grown in forbidden forests and highly favored in Victorian furniture...
...The entire press corps loathes him, but it needs someone to love...
...Mike Tyson, formerly heavyweight champion of the world, was convicted of rape in Indianapolis, and the African tour of pop artiste Mr...
...That's the spirit, jackass...
...John F Fielder Williamstown, Massachusetts Special thanks to Andrew Ferguson for investing the time and energy to attend a Nerd Man weekend...
...With February came the presidential primaries, and with the primaries came a tortured press corps and an absolutely frolicsome challenge to President George Herbert Walker Bush, whose only alibi is that for three years he has been asleep...
...You are our roots...
...John's reputation on the Hill is excellent and deservedly so...
...Is that right...
...No one laughed...
...And how will both of these men respond to the dynamic politics of Mr...
...Since the Supreme Court adjudged capital punishment constitutional in 1976, 158 individuals of Mr...
...Our sons will immediately learn English for free, and they will have the opportunity to marry beautiful young American girls...
...Malone had been passing himself off as a woman on Northwest Nevada Telco's widely-respected telephone sex line, and he alleges that he got the boot because of sex discrimination...
...The Ku Kluxian mentality has risen up against Mr...
...Unhappily for the crowd, all jumpers survived...
...Please do not let this happen ever again...
...Is that proper...
...Coming Home Congratulations on Joshua Muravchik's thorough dissection of the MacArthur Foundation and their programs, which seem to be based on the principle that leftists are the only geniuses around ("MacArthur's Millions," TAS, January 1992...
...RET Speech...
...There the remarkable Mayor Al Erickson, professor of wildlife and public servant, offered to resign when his research ship became stuck in an Antarctic ice sheet, delaying his return to his 975 constituents...
...In one fleeting reference to him in your detailed 15-page [sic] article you imply that John has a poor reputation among Senate staffers and that he could have been responsible for the alleged leaks concerning Anita Hill...
...Brown foresees no problems with our federal bureaucrats, but wait until Mr...
...Dale E. Elliott Lovington, Illinois A Public Service Announcement Your article, "The Real Anita Hill" [by David Brock, TAS, March 1992], without any factual basis or justification, defamed a number of innocent people, including our colleague and friend, John Trasvifla...
...Jackson's long-time aide, Mr...
...One is that the subject matter is too unimportant for such a lengthy article...
...A footnote to the story may be appreciated by your readers...
...The Crisis is Continuing...
...If your publication and reporter are as concerned about ethical behavior as the article suggests, you should print an apology for the totally unwarranted aspersion to the character and integrity of an honorable person...
...In idyllic Nanimo, British Columbia, a thousand sports fans turned out to watch 106 nude bungee jumpers—nineteen of them members of the fair sex—yo-yo-jump from a bridge over treacherous rocks and waters made even more treacherous by pollution from butterfly droppings, lichen runoff, and the disgusting habits of corpulent German tourists...
...And the rest of the world can kiss my ass...
...And what about President Bush...
...Fernando Quispe...
...For your suggestion to the contrary, you owe him and your readers an apology and a retraction...
...There is absolutely no way that he could have played any part in the release to the press of these documents or the contents of them...
...Chirped Miss La Rhea Marketic: one who has "mastered the art of monogamy...
...Peter Brown...
...The decision may have gotten the marplots at the FDA off the hot seat on silicone, but how are they going to handle that alternative bosom enhancer devised by Mr...
...I believe his wonderful piece "America's New Man" (TAS, January 1992) to be the most humorous article to appear in your pages since I began subscribing two years ago...
...I'd like to thank my family for loving me," asseverated the latest cause celebre of the anti–capital punishment cabal, "and taking care of me...
...Three cheers for Andrew Ferguson...
...From our many years of close association with him, we know him to be scrupulously honest and totally honorable...
...At Huntsville State Penitentiary on February 11, Mr...
...The Winter Olympics began and ended in Albertville, France, with Germany heading the list of medal-winners...
...Carl F Engelhardt Arlington, Virginia There are two things wrong with Andrew Ferguson's article...
...Bob Jones, replied "Under no circumstance would we be here if we thought your country smelled...
...On the campaign trail this past month everyone felt a little empty except for Boy Clinton and Pat Buchanan...
...Michael Jackson hit a snag when he was spotted holding his nose in the Ivory Coast...
...In the fashion of the New Man, I honor him...
...On February 10, Mr...
...Floyd Fithian, Chief of Staff Senator Paul Simon —Susan Kaplan, Chief Counsel Constitution Subcommittee United States Senate Washington, D.C...
...Muravchik mentions that one recipient of MacArthur largesse has been the Sandinista figure Alejandro Bendana, a Harvard Ph.D...
...Nothing could be further from the truth...
...Ralph Nader's trial lawyers hear that these bras are being sold to nonswimmers...
...Apparently employees of the House of Representatives' post office have been selling cocaine to Capitol Hill staffers with the full knowledge of some of their postal supervisors...
...Johnny Frank Garret, 28, the lank-haired, gap-toothed murderer of a 76-year-old Roman Catholic nun on Hal(continued on page 12) 10 The American Spectator April 1992 loween night in 1981, died by lethal injection despite protests from animal rights activists and related humanitarians...
...He urged his fellows to carry "three handguns and two rifles, maybe an M-16...
...After weeks of mounting tension over the legality of silicone breast implants, the FDA decided to allow their continued use, though only under the most rigorous scrutiny...
...I have never seen anything like it in any publication that has ever been in my house...
...Amazingly, Harvard University rejected a request by EuroPacific International to market condoms bearing the school's insignia...
...Afterwards the coconut shell may be worn as a hat to ward off the strong rays of the sun and preserve happy memories of the good life...
...Robert V. Rota asserts that he was ordered by the powerful wife of House Speaker Thomas Foley to "hush up" recent investigations into this and such other questionable activities as embezzlement, check kiting, and interest-free loans, to say nothing of a 98.6 percent incumbency rate...
...Without any regard for the privacy of the cows, addicts trail the unfortunate creatures and wait for them to evacuate...
...What is more, House Postmaster Mr...
...The infallible Washington Times revealed on February 3 still more improprieties being perpetrated on Capitol Hill...
...We will have the privilege to taste different brands of soft drinks, paying no more than a dollar for each two-liter bottle," declaims Mr...
...You may find the cow dung smelly and awful, but for them it is heaven...
...In our many years of association with him, we have never known him to be less than fully trustworthy and we have never heard a critical word from anyone about his integrity, honesty, or discretion...
...Daryl Malone, 29, the happily married father of four, ignited controversy in the Liberal camp—setting consumerists against civil libertarians—when he responded to his recent firing by Northwest Nevada Telco by going right to Nevada's Equal Rights Commission and filing a stinging protest...
...Megat Junid Ayob, these bucolic druggies "quickly put a coconut shell over it [the steaming droppings], and sniff the gas through the hole on top of the shell...
...Quispe...
Vol. 25 • April 1992 • No. 4
