Current Wisdom
Jackasses, Assorted
Los Angeles Times A highly irregular communique to the correspondence page of a leading national newspaper, possibly from a resident of Death Row: I request that you publish my willingness to have...
...Hate all around...
...FLOWERS...
...Robert Doman of the great state of California deposits onto the public record a taped exchange between Governor Bill Clinton and a member of his brain trust, suitably introduced with this flavorous caveat: "Note: Portions of these tapes contain sexually explicit language to which you might not wish to expose members of your family": FLOWERS...
...September 15, 1992] Congressional Record In another patriotic service to the commonweal, the Hon...
...My income is much above average and if my taxes were raised by as much as 25% or 50%, that would not lower my level of living a bit...
...He will not wipe our noses for us...
...They don't do it in Japan or in Cuba, either, or in America...
...22.95...
...Note the sex-specific use of the verb "to help...
...Well, the putative leadership of the country represents such a level of ignorance and backwardness that I really can't comment on it...
...In fact, they don't help around the house much anywhere...
...The Tmise [sic] regrets the error...
...Lewis takes on the much-mythologized figure at the center of a popular religion and seeks to dispel many of the myths that have collected about him...
...So it was soothing to discover that even in Sweden, men don't do their fair share of the housework...
...It consists of those who faced the same decision at the same time and made a braver choice...
...Women are increasingly used as ornaments in the office, or as lures to bring in business...
...Ross Perot can bluntly tell it as it is...
...September 12, 1992] New York In New York magazine, a splendidly nonjudgmental notice of a forthcoming literary event: Jesus, by A.N...
...In the early 1980s, when I was a practicing nudist at Riis Park beach, Federal law determined that to protect those who did not wish to view anatomies in toto, nudists would be restricted to one section of the beach...
...Hate the poor...
...President [laughs] [garbled] And you said [garble] `Gennifer, I just wanted you to know that there might be some reporters or something out there' and you said, 'Now, uh, you be sure to [garbled words] [both laugh] say there's nothing to the rumor,' and I said, O.K., I, well I shouldn't even say this to you, probably embarrass you...
...Male gawkers circled this section like coyotes...
...Summer 1992] Image In the San Francisco Examiner's Sunday magazine, Alice Walker, the celebrated authoress, displays the infantile solemnities that have made her a major illustrata among the Republic's shanty intelligentsia: In the aftermath of the L.A...
...Governor...
...W. W. Norton...
...laughs] CLINTON...
...Their analysis was comparative...
...riot, Dan Quayle and other conservatives asserted that the country's basic problem was the breakdown in family values...
...The proportion of women in the most powerful positions has declined...
...I think if we had those three women, with maybe Bernice Reagan, who is with [the singing group] Sweet Honey in the Rock, as adviser, we would have a presidency that could take us out of this dreary backward-looking, unhealthy and dangerous place we are in...
...I resent wasteful expenditures on armies and armaments that are not needed...
...For the presidency I propose a triad of three grandmothers: a Native American, an African American and a European American...
...He has learned that his emotions can be a strength as well as a weakness, and has a strong belief in putting your money where your mouth is...
...I said I had to tell them that you ate good (feline term for female genitalia) and you said, 'Well you can tell them that if I don't run for President [laughs...
...I do not pretend that Ross Perot walks on water...
...I see him as a human being who takes large bites of life and spits out what he feels is an untruth or an injustice...
...Meier, I sunbathed at Riis Park satisfied with my breast size and buttock shape...
...David Ziskind Los Angeles [September 17, 1992] New York Post Mike McAlary, the Anna Quindlen of this illustrious gazette, re-creates from his richly propagandized noodle Ronald Reagan, the overwhelming choice of the electorate in two presidential races: To most Americans, Ronald Reagan's beliefs were scary and damaging to the fabric of American society...
...So who is H. Ross Perot...
...July 19, 1992] New York Times A news report in America's newspaper of record, allegedly from Miss Sheryl WuDunn in Peking...
...garbled] FLOWERS...
...Hate the cities...
...Perot was bound and determined to fulfill the promise of the 9's in his chart, a happy marriage between working for the good of mankind and for personal material satisfaction...
...Even at that he embraced those periods with an inner zeal and dignity...
...I said, 'Well, at the time you eat good (street term used for female genitalia...
...Who is this man who dares to kick the political system's butt and rattle the bones of bureaucracy...
...September 14, 1992] New York Times As the Summer of '92 winds down, the move to desegregate New York's beaches takes shape: Like Carlin Meier, I hope there will be no segregation of topless bathers from topped bathers ("Women's Breasts: So What...
...They catcalled and loudly discussed breast size and buttock shape...
...Perot...
...Ronald Reagan made it safe to hate again...
...I also think that we should have a council of war and peace made up only of women who bear children 80 The American Spectator November 1992 and not of men at all...
...All I can think of is that we should all be thinking of an entirely new form of leadership...
...That section was near an old age home, on the theory, I suppose, that those folks had already seen it all...
...FLOWERS...
...And I recommend three women whom I think would be wonderful: Wilma Mankiller, who is the head of the Cherokee Nation, Maxine Waters, who is in the Congress, and Gloria Steinem...
...Sectioning off the topless would not honor the spirit or intent of the opinion by Judge Vito J. Titone of the New York State Court of Appeals or normalize relations among the breast-obscured, the bare-chested and malefactors...
...It is all the social policy superiority...
...For a caring society, for healthy and happy neighbors, for hopeful children, I want to contribute more to a providing government...
...He will make himself available, give of his energy, but only if we ask...
...At first, like Ms...
...So I have a hard time trying to come back to the level of thought where you actually are seriously thinking about people like Quayle and Bush...
...But this could be another example of well-preserved 1972 Maoist madcappery: The capitalist-style changes in China over the last dozen years have made almost everyone richer, but in some ways they have also made life more difficult and more frustrating for the nation's 565 million women...
...But anyway I try to find the humor in things...
...Industry is not sufficiently enterprising at this time, and private persons are not able to reverse the recession...
...Lisa S. Lowenheck New York [August 26, 1992] The American Spectator November 1992 81...
...Herein lies one of our greatest gifts as humans: learning compassion and understanding through our very humanity...
...I soon felt jealous of the women they harassed most...
...Remember a long time ago when you called me and said that if you announced for, well, it was back the first time you were going to announce for, uhCLINTON...
...October...
...Well, if we learn them, then we can unlearn them—or better yet, we can just stop ever teaching that stuff...
...Physical attractiveness has become a crucial factor in hiring women...
...The biographer of Tolstoy and C.S...
...No matter how pervasive they are, you know, they ain't genetic...
...August 18, 1992] Windsong Messenger (Boulder, Colorado) Numerologist Patricia L. Taylor proffers a trenchant analysis of the greatest American since Henry Ford, by way of her science—a science that the United States government is sadly deficient in funding but that many faculty members of the Harvard Law School swear by: What are the driving forces of this man who has stirred the adrenalin of hope and promise in the hearts of Americans...
...More now than under Mao Zedong, they are being discriminated against in jobs, in housing, in land allocation...
...What do the later days hold for Mr...
...CLINTON...
...He has tripped and fallen and has had to swallow bitter medicine...
...September 23, 1992] New York Times In the "Corrections" section of this estimable organ of The Enlightenment, a poignant example of American journalistic excellence: The "Candidates on Television" listing yesterday misspelled the name of the Vice President in some editions...
...However, what I heard began to affect me...
...Op-Ed, July 29...
...It would appear that Mr...
...It is Quayle, not Quale...
...He produced a peace for our world, but a rage in our cities...
...September 9, 1992] Washington Post Professor James Fallows, Washington editor of the Atlantic, makes a solemn stab at moral philosophy and reveals himself a mere heckler: One group of people has the moral right to stand in judgment of what Clinton (or I) did...
...His personal number, or Reality vibration, is 9. It came into influence around age 50...
...FLOWERS...
...320 pages...
...but as long as the fears of our citizens (or the greed of the military-industrial complex) cannot be dispelled by reason, some waste is inevitable...
...We learn those systems of inequality...
...And I thought, you know that's not real funny right now...
...As a Numerologist I am compelled to find out...
...When men do dishes, it is called helping...
...If we decide to jump in with him, we had better be prepared to pull our own weight...
...Wilson...
...However, we are still rich enough to provide employment, job training and health care sorely needed...
...I've got to keen [sic] my voice down, my parents are in the other .. [laughs] [garbled] CLINTON...
...Do you see any truth in that...
...When women do dishes, it is called life...
...As a Numerologist, L know that we humans swing on the pendulum of the positive and negative...
...Do you remember what I said to you...
...Hate minorities...
...July 28, 1992] International Herald Tribune Girl talk heard 'round the world from the incontinent Anna Quindlen: NEW YORK—Americans have gotten a little tired of Sweden, and it is not just because of the model wars, in which American women are forced out of cover girl positions by Swedes and driven to seek work at auto shows...
...What...
...As Chinese society focuses more on profit than on equality, and as Communist morality loses its influence, women are in some cases losing the ground they gained in the Maoist years...
...What'd you say...
...certainly, nothing I saw at Riis Park put me to shame...
...Los Angeles Times A highly irregular communique to the correspondence page of a leading national newspaper, possibly from a resident of Death Row: I request that you publish my willingness to have my taxes increased...
...You might be researching sex education and you discover that there is a program for Swedish eighth-graders that teaches sex education AND microbiology...
...My sense of self-esteem was diminished, and I began to think of enhancing and reducing parts of myself...
...Summer 1992] Kalamazoo College Quarterly The graduating kids of Kal Col get a swell excursus into American slang from the swank Johnnetta B. Cole, member of the Jimmy Carter Rat Pack: Take racism and sexism...
...This group includes those who served in Vietnam and those who formally refused to go...
...Day care, maternity leave, the elderly—the American motto has become "I don't want to hear one more word about how well they do it in Sweden...
...sidewalk scene where a gun was firing and men were falling...
...The last time anyone saw the old coot, he was ducking flying glass and scaring us back to a terrible Washington, D.C...
Vol. 25 • November 1992 • No. 11
