Current Wisdom
Jackasses, Assorted
CURRENT WISDOM New York Times Food for thought from the Reagan White House's most eloquent software, as transcribed by her pal, Maureen Dowd: "Inside those blue pinstriped suits, crisp white...
...And there it is, all off...
...The majority of the population feels that this is absolutely impossible, a female standing to urinate, but in reality, it is a rather easy thing to do...
...Kenneth C. Jones Las Vegas Actually, this whole whore business is getting to me...
...Most of the viewers were on the edges of their seats as the climax approached...
...What I am proposing is that women begin using the urinals that are already equipped in the dual-sex restrooms in restaurants, nightclubs, school dormitories and other places where they might be found, and that the private sector begin installing them in existing female restrooms...
...In a recent report to management detailing their grievances, the women at the Florida paper say that: • "Colleagues feel they can talk freely about women's bodies and their bodily functions—in front of the women...
...Men routinely get better assignments...
...Petersburg Times say they are forced to work in a sexist atmosphere in which lewd comments, discrimination and even girlie pinups are a fact of newsroom life...
...July 8, 1991] Congressional Record God's surprisingly trendy dream, as translated from the original rumbles by guest chaplain to the United States Senate, the very pretty Rev...
...Heads nodded in the audience...
...She and the others gave it a thumbs-up rating...
...It's bad enough that we have this stain on the state, and now the whoremasters want to market items with advertising on them...
...Sherwood said, "as you can see, the gallbladder is almost off...
...You can see I have the gallbladder now, Karen, and we're going to start to take it out...
...The feminist movement began here and spread throughout the world...
...We remember especially today our sisters throughout the Nation who struggle against injustice in our society...
...In the fifth grade I pledged the flag...
...O.K., Karen, as you can see, here is the gallbladder," Dr...
...Open our hearts and our minds to see the sexism and racism in our society...
...Almost every woman on earth at some time has wished she could accomplish this...
...This is outrageous...
...June 30, 1991] Monthly Planet In the little-known house organ of the Santa Cruz County Nuclear Weapons Freeze, the infelicitously named Miss Sandra Wong makes a revolutionary declaration certain to earn her the Medal of Freedom when Rep...
...We're going to open the gallbladder for you and show you the inside...
...Oh, just bile...
...While several section editors and an assistant managing editor are women, virtually all top management jobs are held by white men...
...Did all those working ladies wake up one morning when they were children, look into the mirror, and say, "When I grow up, I want to be a whore in Nevada...
...In her memoir, "What I Saw at the Revolution," Ms...
...The gallbladder exit was accompanied by a whooshing sound as it was sucked off the screen and up a tube...
...July 20, 1991] Time Flapdoodle vivace from Barbara Ehrenreich, dissident and essayist for Time, an underground organ of the Yuppie Revolutionary Front: In fact, dissidence ought to be regarded as one of our finest traditions and proudest exports to the world...
...One woman said, "Times management has become precisely the kind of exclusive, all-white, all-male club that we lambast on our editorial pages...
...Women who complain have been dismissed as a "lesbian clique...
...Would some of our state legislators in Carson City wake up...
...Give us wisdom and compassion to use the power and gifts given each of us to act courageously on their behalf...
...Bennett pointed to a white spot`See how they nicked the liver a little bit'!—and then to a dark fluid...
...Jefferson, I daresay, would be proud...
...By the ninth grade, I wanted to burn it...
...I acknowledge the flag of the United Racist States of America and to the repression for which it stands, two or three bifurcated nations, two economies, two healthcare systems, two nations under God, divisible by color, class, gender and access, with liberty for some and justice for fewer...
...Work with us and within us that we might be part of transforming this world into the world that You have envisioned for us, our lives into the lives for which You have created us, where women and men and bricklayers and stockbrokers live as equal partners, where nation does not lift up sword against nation, and where children teach us to live in peace with one another...
...You do not need devices such as a funnel and no artificial prosthetic apparatus either...
...I, myself, have been doing it since my mother taught me as an alternative to "hovering" when I was about five years old...
...Many people, in fact most people who will read this, will think that I am off my rocker, but if you bear with me (males), and if you try this (females), we will save untold gallons of water, expedite the process and create a more sanitary environment...
...Only one of the company's 12 directors is a woman...
...June 25, 1991] Las Vegas Review-Journal Moral rebirth in a desert Shangri-la: I read the Review-Journal's 15-line news brief about how that noble Nevada institution, the Chicken Ranch, will be marketing and selling men's and women's T-shirts, golf shirts, sweats and caps with its logo...
...Now wouldn't that look nice hanging on your kitchen wall...
...Bennett's home in the suburb of Wantagh, L.I., on Wednesday evening...
...A third man told a woman reporter she was getting raises because another manager "has the hots for her...
...I'm so ashamed of this "progressive" attitude of my native state that I keep a car licensed in Arizona with which I take trips out of state so I'm not laughed out of other regions...
...As the camera panned, Ms...
...Pat Schroeder is finally elected President of the United States of America and Iraq: am writing this letter because I believe the time has come for women as a gender to fully take on equal rights and also take some of the blame for the current water crisis that has been a part of our daily lives for the past five years...
...It isn't funny...
...How quaint...
...One male supervisor told a pregnant staffer, "Your breasts are really getting huge...
...Yet as we celebrate, we know, too, that the struggle continues...
...Your God-given anatomy is all you need...
...Everyone applauded...
...Is this one of those inquiring-mindswant-to-know scams...
...Another told a woman that "she'll have to choose between being a mommy and being a journalist...
...So I stood, crossed my heart and said the pledge, mentally editing as I went along...
...Now, when I first saw that, I thought it was blood...
...Hello, hello...
...Then came a climactic bit of cinematography: the abdomen rapidly receding from view as the camera pulled out of the body and then panned across the operating table to the gallbladder sitting on a white cloth...
...Catherine Schuyler of Ponckhockie Union Church, Kingston, New York: O God of justice, we pray for Your children who are poor, for families without a roof over their heads, for babies who will go to sleep tonight without a decent meal...
...Also, brothel whores, called "working ladies," will be posing in "period" costumes for an 18-month calendar...
...But it's just bile...
...Sherwood said...
...I can't exactly say I'm excited about it," said Meg Marshall, one of the first guests to arrive at Ms...
...Why was this enterprise even mentioned in the R-J...
...John Bernard Laughlin [July 14, 1991] Washington Post Appalling conditions from life in a macho hellhole: Women at the St...
...CURRENT WISDOM New York Times Food for thought from the Reagan White House's most eloquent software, as transcribed by her pal, Maureen Dowd: "Inside those blue pinstriped suits, crisp white shirts and red-striped ties, beat the hearts of men who are utterly at the mercy of the lunar tides and utterly affected by the vapors and by an almost feline desire to look man-to-man at one's enemy and scratch his little eyes out," Peggy Noonan, who wrote speeches for both Ronald Reagan and George Bush, said in an interview...
...Claire Loring Henderson Recently, your newspaper ran a little blurb about how the Chicken Ranch whorehouse is planning to market clothing items and its own calendar, featuring its working "ladies...
...July 1991] Los Angeles Times A New Age super-patriot sounds off on the op-ed page of the Golden State's Times: At a recent fifth-grade promotion ceremony, I felt compelled to go through the motions of flag pledging, to go so far as to say the words, because I thought the joy of the day was more important than my feelings about the flag...
...We celebrate Your hand as it works through groups which encourage women to recognize their potential and which call all Your people, men andwomen alike, to treat one another with the respect due to children of God...
...Amen...
...July 1, 1991] THE AMERICAN SPECTATOR SEPTEMBER 1991 43...
...Last week she defined the malady as "When a guy gets so pumped up, red-faced and swollen with the testosterone-induced enjoyment of power that he begins to do strange things, and begins to take aggressive actions that he would not take under normal circumstances...
...Our civil rights movement has inspired the downtrodden in dozens of nations, and gay rights was practically invented here...
...July 11, 1991] New York Times In the century of the Lindbergh transatlantic flight, the first four-minute mile, The Kinsey Report, the Apollo space series, and the Carter Presidency, still more history is made, this time by the endearingly farfelu Miss Karen Bennett: As she put out the popcorn and potato chips in her living room, Karen Bennett said she believed this was going to be the first party ever held to watch a gallbladder operation...
...But I am looking forward to it...
...The people who would sell their mothers and grandmothers for money have placed a black mark on the beautiful state of Nevada and it's a darn shame...
...And there it is...
...A couple of people munched on potato chips...
...Normally I hate looking at other people's home movies, but this will be different...
...What I am talking about is the fact that every time a woman uses the restroom she flushes the toilet using between five and eight gallons of water as opposed to every time a man uses a urinal he uses only a gallon or two...
...But at the very least it was the first party ever held to watch Karen Bennett's gallbladder operation...
...Is anyone in Carson City paying attention...
...The human body is so wonderful," said Donna Russell as the video ended...
...O.K., Karen," Dr...
...That is a difficult claim to verify...
...We who are natives are ashamed...
...Noonan complained that groups of men in politics become infected with "testosterone poisoning...
Vol. 24 • September 1991 • No. 9
