Current Wisdom

Jackasses, Assorted

CURRENT WISDO M The Great Books Series Another milestone on the path to human perfection courtesy of Dr. Doug Larche, who "has re-written Mother Goose rhymes with a sensitivi - ty and a social...

...There was an old couple who lived in a shoe, They had so many children they didn' t know what to do...
...Q: And so in America, those that could make the difference refuse to look, refuse to be affected...
...She told of absentmindedly taking out two cups for a late-night brew frequently after her hus band's death and recollected something Lennon once told her...
...Lately, however, he has taken to wearin g a more dangling ornament . Every time we hug, this appendage rakes my cheek o r pokes me in the eye...
...She said one recent late night tri p to the kitchen found her taking only one cup off the shelf...
...June 1986] San Francisco Chronicle The quality of religious experience open to all the faithful of the New Age: She spoke softly to the audience between songs, remembering her husband, telling stories and giving off a sweet, sensitive aura that belied all the nasty things that have been written and said about her...
...On Thursday morning, Bias died suddenly at age 22, with no clues or alarms or history of any physical problems . Hearing of the death of Bias—he was gloriously in the headlines just the day before as the Celtics' first pick in the Na-tional Basketball Association draft, and th e second selection over all—was as shocking in its way as hearing of the murder of Presi dent Kennedy as he rode in a motorcade while thousands cheered him...
...Later, there were unconfirmed reports of cocain e use...
...COMPLETE LIBRARY—6 books—All informatio n needed to raise, sell fishworms, crickets plu s free consultation service, only $15 . CARTER FISHWORM FARM, Plains, GA 31780...
...Yeah, basically, because we stopped being human...
...Maybe we should go back t o shaking hands until some international safety standards are formulated...
...He helped confuse the boundaries between the good guys and the bad guy s and reinforced the suspicion most people have that Western governments do engage in "illegitimate" acts of violence...
...It scares the hell out of me...
...Can't look because as soon as you look, you recognize you must re-spond, and in order to respond it means yo u must give up some of what you have—an d to give that up is terrifying . It's frighten-ing...
...Because this sort of conspiratorial , and provocative, behavior is not unknown in the recent history of intelligence cadres in the Western states, Qaddafi had a point—but one that he may never have in-tended...
...Somewhere along the line, we got so involved with trying t o be something that we thought was impor-tant, that we thought was a dream, th e American dream so-called, and that it was important for us to dream that dream together...
...White, she attended an ethnical-ly diverse public high school . "It was culture shock to come here and find all these rich white people...
...CURRENT WISDO M The Great Books Series Another milestone on the path to human perfection courtesy of Dr...
...Raise fishworms, crickets...
...But Bias, like Presi dent Kennedy, was youthful and vigorous and talented and charismatic...
...Perhaps he was inadvertently saying that although some Arabs may be terrorists they are over -shadowed by the states of terror that con-trol the planet . And in this, unfortunately, there is a nuclear truth . [June 7, 19861 Mother Jones Demon racism sniffed out once agai n by the well-tuned snout of Christabel Hitchens: A neoconservative, wrote Irving Kristol, i s a "liberal who has been mugged by reali-ty...
...I realized," she said, "we are one...
...A: Yeah, it exists because . . . Q: Somebody didn't care...
...From wrestling to Rambo, yo u don't have to look far to see the depths o f our current obsession with the body-as-weapon...
...I would take it as a sign of incipient loathing if one of my usual hugees offered his hand to me in-stead) who is perhaps six inches taller than I. I am not used to hugging very tall peo-ple...
...July/August 1986] New York Times The conditioned reflex of sportswriter Ira Berkow as the Marche Funebre of Ludwig's Third Symphony rumbles in his ears and the drug investigation continues: Len Bias was born Nov...
...Advocacy Press, Santa Barbara, California, $12.95.] Nation More arcanum from the Nation, that noctilucous jewel in the rational night , an otherwise depressingly rational night: Interestingly, after the attack on Tripoli , Qaddafi predicted that the anticipated wave of terrorist attacks in Western Europe would be the work of the C.I.A...
...It scares the hell out of you...
...April 25, 1986] Rodale's Organic Gardening An arcane missive interred in the pages of an authentic organ of the Carter underground: FREE LITERATURE sent promptly...
...I have to stand on tiptoe to make sure my chin surmounts his shoulder in the ap-proved manner...
...That's part of the reason, bu t basically it's just our insulation fro m ourselves as well—psychologically, emo-tionally, spiritually...
...I'm going to fight for divestmen t and I'm not taking classes...
...So they gave them some broth and som e good whole wheat bread, And kissed them all sweetly and sen t them to bed...
...We're isolated fro m ourselves...
...April 27, 1986] San Francisco Chronicle Cultural notes from a modern Henr y James—Jon Carroll, chauffeur o f immensities : I, for instance, have a hug buddy (I'm not sure why I hug some of my male friends bu t not others, but I do know that once you'v e entered into a hug-on-meeting relationship, there's no turning back...
...If the sky stays pure and clean , We will see your twinkle bright . But smoke, exhaust, and acid rain All will cloud your flickering light . Winkle twinkle little star, I'd like to keep you as you are...
...Each had attained great heights in his respective world, each envisioned reaching even greater heights . The first news reports said that doctor s had not yet determined the cause of Bias' s death...
...I don't have the guts t o do it...
...A: A lot of reasons...
...Since he is also a bear hug-ger, I have had occasionally to stand on my toes until my calves cramped up . Then I've had to stifle my boyish crie s of agony while muttering "How's it goin', guy" through clenched teeth . -Anyway, this tall friend has for some tim e worn a small gold earring . Nothing fancy ; just a little hemisphere the size of an ant shish-kabobing his left lobe...
...We tried, by living up to our own ideals at home, to create a society whose vir-tue would attract and convert others...
...Steam coming out of her ears, she says : "While I am going to school in this rich, snotty, white community, there are hundreds of black people who are dy-ing...
...Doug Larche, who "has re-written Mother Goose rhymes with a sensitivi - ty and a social consciousness for modern times" : Winkle twinkle little star, How I wonder what you are . Up above the world so high , Like a diamond in the sky...
...May 12, 1986] THE AMERICAN SPECTATOR AUGUST 1986...
...When are they going to learn," she said Lennon would say, "JohnandYoko is one word...
...She answered, "I love you ." And meant it . [May 17, 1986] In These Times Learned poesy on our contemporary condition from rock metaphysicia n Steve Perry: Politically, wrestling works neatly as metaphoric amplification and ideological justification of the present administration . Cowboy metaphors can only take you so far in explaining Reagan-think, but wrestlin g comes close to encapsulating his entire worldview...
...18, 1963, four days before John Fitzgerald Kennedy was sho t to death at age 46...
...June 21, 1986] Los Angeles Times Magazine The lugubrious confessions of movie star Martin Sheen, coughed up after prolonged cross-examination on th e subject of hoboes: Q: Do you ever say, Why does this exist i n this place, in this surrounding, in this country...
...Book—How and Where to Sell with Order...
...The audience treated her with utte r reverence, piercing the silence with con-tinual screams of "We love you, Yoko...
...I don't have the guts to go to prison—where I belong...
...Here, with its faintly racist undertone, is the essence of the neocon mentality...
...In an effort to avoid instant blindness, I have had to bury my face in his shoulder, leading onlookers t o believe that I have been overcome by grief . We've come a long way, baby, but we ai n ' t there yet...
...Indeed they are...
...A: Can't look...
...The ghostly presence o f the late Beatle hovered above the stag e throughout, like a guardian angel, safel y shepherding Ono through the performance of her unorthodox but revelatory music...
...Was it, some wondered, a congenital malfunction, like Marfan syndrome...
...Now we try to persuade foreign nations by nuclear missiles and aircraft carriers and by the arrogant insistence that we know their interests better than they do...
...This in no way is meant to compare th e global impact of a world leader with that of a basketball player...
...I said, Look, I can't deal with this anymore...
...That's why I withdrew from this col-lege...
...Redworms—1000-$8.95, 5000-$42.50...
...Her furry little dog with a blu e bandana is named Manny, after Winni e Mandela...
...or the F.B.I...
...Each was glowing in the national spotlight...
...America to -day holds out not a torch but a blowtorc h to the world . Humanity's friend ha s undergone a horrid sea change into humanity's bully...
...Once we tried to persuade foreign nations by our ex ample...
...There's only one issue I don' t understand . If they didn't want so many why didn' t they plan ? [From Nursery Rhymes: The Equal Rhymes Amendment, by Father Gander...
...the wrestler's hulking physiqu e may indeed be the best paradigm for con -temporary America . [May 14-20, 1986] Village Voice The thrilling life of Carol Caton a s reported by Norman Atkins on the Dartmouth front: Carol Caton, from Washington, D.C ., a sophomore...
...I just can' t benefit from the fact that people are dying . I can't do it ." [June 3, 1986] New York Asked to comment on our refurbished Statue of Liberty, frumpy Arthu r Schlesinger, Jr., bawls and bawls: Is our contemporary America still a beacon of hope to suffering humanity...

Vol. 19 • August 1986 • No. 8


 
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