Parody

Parody ďLast July, Gore and his teenage son Albert made an arduous three-day hike up Parody Mount Rainier in Washington State. Initially, aides said the vice president would not discuss the trek...

...2. L aryngitis before Glee Club Performance...
...What many young voters donít know is that as a journalist in Vietnam, Al had to duplicate his stories with carbon paper and mimeograph pages...
...Washington Post, October 7, 1999 Gore 2000 Heís a Human Being, Really...
...Initially, aides said the vice president would not discuss the trek because he did not want to Ďexploití the private experience with his son...
...Al was proud to be a member of the St...
...The ink used to threaten to smudge on his uniform, which Al always liked to keep clean out of love for his country...
...Weíre going to focus-group them, of course, but in the meantime Iíd like to see you work these moving personal stories into the stump speech: 1. Alís Favorite Concierge Dies...
...Our job is to get this personal side of Al out where American voters can see it...
...I was reminded once again that weíve got a great candidate here...
...Albanís Glee Club...
...Al learned the valuable lesson that he should redouble his fund-raising efforts so he can move into the White House, where there are no mice...
...3. Carbon Paper Problems...
...When Al was a young boy growing up at the Fairfax Hotel, his favorite concierge, Frank, used to carry his book bag to the limo...
...But now it has become a central metaphor in his stump speech...
...Al loves all of his fellow creatures...
...But the mouse kept eating his bran fl akes, and Al came to the cruel understanding that it was kill or be killed...
...Af ter convening a special commission and much anguished debate over its recommendations, Al agreed to place a pain-free K evorkian mouse trap under the sink...
...This gave Al profound insights into the injustices suffered by African Americans throughout our nationís history...
...L ast winter, you may recall, a mouse got into the vice presidentís residence...
...MEMO TO : Speechwriters FROM: Bob Shrum RE: Alís P ro foundly Shatt erin g Experiences Folks, While in the van coming back from the airport, we had a chance to map out some of the profoundly shattering experiences (PSEs) that have shaped Al Goreís life...
...When Al started talking about his sister ís death, and how his convention speech about it gave him a 5-point bump in the polls, I felt tears coming to my eyes...
...But one day, Al put too many math textbooks in the bag, and when Frank tried to pick it up he had a heart attack and croaked...
...eíve put together a list of PSEs for you to draw on...
...As you know, Al has called V ietnam a ďlong dark tunnel...
...Al learned none of us is perfect...
...John McCain isnít the only war hero in the race...
...But on the night before the spring concert in which Al was sched - uled to perform ďOlí Man River,Ē he came down with laryngitis and an understudy had to take over...
...4. Need for a Mouse Trap in Residence...
...As a result, Alís homeroom teacher marked Al down as tardy, thus marring Alís perfect attendance record...

Vol. 5 • October 1999 • No. 5


 
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