The Spice Box

THE SPICE BOX Ay, America Reader Brenda Rosenbaum of Framlngham, Massachusetts, writes, "While driving down Route 9,1 spotted this movie marquee whose double feature playing in Cinema 2 seemed to...

...New York vs...
...Remember...
...An enhancement to a standard tax program, which would calculate your "fair share" of temple and synagogue dues and UJA contribution...
...Be sure to include your name, address and telephone number...
...Veteran reader William Braiterman, of Baltimore, sends us the following entirely credible letter: "Many years ago Mel-vin Zaiger (now Moshe Zemer) made aliyah from Baltimore to Israel...
...We reserve the right to edit all submissions...
...The Israel Bureau of Government Statistics reports that the number of milk cows in Israel is growing at a faster rate than the nation's (human) population...
...Material cannot be returned...
...Depending on length, well pay from $5 to $50 for material that is accepted...
...Or do you prefer the entry forwarded by Richard Goldberg, of New York...
...Marcel J. Silberman The way to a man's theology is through his stomach...
...Zakon's item in November's TSB about "Jewish" computers, I am enclosing a copy of a portion of Radio Shack's Software Sourcebook which shows that a Gematria program is indeed available...
...Thanks to Judah Zetlin-Levine for bringing it to our attention...
...Ponder that...
...It could, of course, have been worse: They might have ecumenically paired "Monsi-gnor" with "The Chosen," or even, heaven forfend, "First Blood" with you know what (or who...
...Later, perhaps speedily, in our days, it could be adapted to compute trumah and ma'aser...
...A recent mailing from the Jewish National Fund was addressed...
...Sorry, folks, we just can't get involved in translating that one...
...But then we saw Temple President Bonnie Millender's accompanying note, explaining (to our disappointment) that this check was merely used to pay for the lights installed along the wooded trail that connects the temple and the rabbi's street...
...Detroit may have to work quickly to avoid losing the Jewish market, for we soon may see the Toyota To-rah, the Nissan Nes and the Honda Chacham...
...THE SPICE BOX Ay, America Reader Brenda Rosenbaum of Framlngham, Massachusetts, writes, "While driving down Route 9,1 spotted this movie marquee whose double feature playing in Cinema 2 seemed to me to characterize in two words— the 'Jinxed' and the 'Chosen'—the entire span of Jewish history...
...Good sports The list includes Nusach Hari-B'nai Zion Congregation, United Hebrew Congregation, Traditional Congregation of Creve Coeur and Young Israel Synagogue...
...Other suggested Jewish computer applications: A program to give candle-lighting times: You furnish longitude and latitude, the computer does the rest...
...See whether you can write a skit that uses all the words...
...You'd have expected their states to be reversed, right...
...If you do, and you think it might be worthy of publication, please send it along to Gary Rosenblatt, editor of the Baltimore Jewish Times...
...None tops the one sent to us by Sarah Nussbaum, of Pough-keepsie...
...Bostonian Norman Spack spotted this ad in a Huntington Theatre playbill...
...I mailed the returned envelope back to him, telling him to inquire at the post office as to why the letter had been returned...
...Invitation Readers are invited— and encouraged—to submit material for The Spice Box...
...Pennsylvania And here, just to violate your stereotypes, are two license plates...
...Karen Weinstein forwards an ad from the New Haven Register: KILL 2 BIRDS WITH ONE STONE...
...We corresponded regularly, and one letter I sent to him, addressed to Rabbi Melvin Zaiger, was returned, marked, 'No such person.' Later, I continued to receive mail from him from the same address as had been on the letter that was returned...
...A modification of a mailing list program for bar mitzvahs and weddings...
...So the name at the top of the page, right under the heading, "Synagogues," comes as a surprise: "Country Hill Swim and Tennis Club...
...Please send us ideas, notes, curiosities—anything you'd like to share with our subscribers...
...as to macher, pronounced to rhyme, more or less, with soccer, except that you've got to sort of gargle half way through, it means, roughly, VIP...
...Mensch, which we prefer to spell "mentsch," everybody knows...
...He took it to the post office and the manager there called in the mail carrier to And out the reason...
...It keeps track of the invitations sent out, the RSVPs, the gifts and whether the appropriate thank you note has been sent...
...613 mpg* Another one from Penn Valley, PA's Rabbi Andrew Sacks: "The Japanese, always the leaders in technology, now bring us a true 'Mitzvah Mobile,' perfecting an idea first developed by the Luba-vitchers...
...Actually, we think the whole thing is not a movie marquee at all, but a skit game like the kind we used to have at camp...
...So much for latter-day enlightenment...
...Her husband is chairman of the local chevra kadisha (burial society...
...Confuter Now and again, we stumble across one of those wonderful computerized letter glitches...
...lCltzrahs per gallon Softwhere...
...Learn now to SAVE MONEY WHEN YOU BUY MEAT and LET THE BIBLE CHANGE YOUR LIFE As an EXTRA BONUS to those attending these Bible study classes A BUTCHER will give a 30 minute talk on WAYS TO SAVE MONEY ON MEAT and for another 30 minutes A BIBLE TEACHER will show you HOW TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE...
...He's with the American Committee for the Shaare Zedek Hospital in Jerusalem, whose computer just knocked out a letter addressed to "Chevra T. Hillim...
...We were all ready to call up J. S. Gray Electric and order a dozen or so whatchamacallits for ourselves, figuring that if they can provide a spiritual light to follow a rabbi wherever he or she might tread, surely they could come up with something to help out the rest of us...
...Money talks Either Temple Beth Avodah knows something the rest of us don't, or else its rabbi gives particularly electrifying sermons...
...The mailman answered, 'The letter was addressed to Rabbi Melvin Zaiger, and he is no rabbi____' "Rabbi Zaiger is a Reform rabbi and the current spiritual leader of the Reform synagogue in Tel Aviv...
...But by the rabbis, is be a rabbi...
...Louis, MO, Yellow Pages...
...So much for the age-old conflict between the Jews and the Hellenists, resolved in one fell swoop of the printing press, right there on page 1396 of the St...
...Hidden significance...
...To The Spice Box: In response to Mr...
...It's enough to make you want to guernsey...
...Wonder of wonders, miracle of— And here we'd been thinking all along that the @ symbol on our food stood for the Orthodox Union...
...well, look at the label yourself...

Vol. 8 • January 1983 • No. 2


 
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