The Quiet Corner
615 THE QUIET CORNER I counsel th.ee, shut not thy heart nor thy library.—C. Lamb. "There now seems to be a great to-do about conversation," remarked Dr. Anglecius. "Whose?" inquired...
...Scrap-book...
...Angelicus, nervously feeling his bosom...
...There's no such thing as 'politely eavesdropping.' " But the Doctor continued: " 'Between Englishmen, Dr...
...Started, perhaps...
...But she discourses fluently about herself or other women.' (Especially, other women," muttered the Doctor...
...but not nicely," corrected the Doctor...
...Everybody's," replied the Doctor...
...That's sufficient to show that you would be a very uncomfortable dinner partner...
...Your evening shirt and your waistcoat, Doctor...
...I observe, Dr...
...You must have dressed hurriedly...
...The lady, or the gentleman...
...But the London woman talks about a greater range of subjects than her Gotham cousin...
...I've cautioned you before about taking these advertisements too seriously...
...Carvey Landis, assistant professor of psychology at Wesleyan University, has been making a study of what people talk about...
...But go on with the advertisement...
...But this one seems to me to be very sage and sensible," explained the Doctor...
...Note the picture—a charming, but rather cross, young lady, seated in a cab and eyeing with disapproval a most depressed gentleman— underneath, the caption: 'You Didn't Say a Single Word All Evening...
...I'm not a person," replied the Doctor, "to take undue risks...
...inquired Euphemia...
...I shall leave it to you to open the conversation...
...Angelicus, "he hadn't studied a certain scrap-book...
...replied the Doctor, beamingly...
...Was such a thing ever said to a lady...
...It is, and a superb one," replied the Doctor...
...It's much the same thing," sulked Euphemia...
...asked Euphemia...
...The Librarian...
...inquired Euphemia...
...Landis believes that the chief topic of conversation is the same as between Americans!— namely, money and business...
...Listen: 616 " 'You didn't say a single word all evening.' " 'How could I ? I didn't even know what they were talking about.' " 'Well, Ralph, I wouldn't brag about that.' " 'But how was I supposed to know that they were going to talk literature and art...
...Enough...
...Because," explained Dr...
...Indeed, Miss Euphemia...
...cried Dr...
...But here is the real test...
...Well, the best way to find out is to invite me to dinner," suggested Euphemia...
...No...
...Give me a sample of your dinner conversation first, and then I'll decide whether I shall ask you or not...
...asked the Doctor...
...Dinner conversation, like all other conversation," protested Euphemia, "depends on reciprocity...
...The New York woman talks largely about men or clothing.' " "That's a libel," protested Euphemia...
...And this very point about business is confirmed in a recent news item from the New York World: " 'Middletown, Connecticut:—Dr...
...And what makes you think I am a man of parts...
...inquired Euphemia, curiously...
...Ask me another,' " quoted Dr...
...The diary of a pugilist, I presume...
...Can you tell me what they think about...
...The London woman,' " went on the Doctor, " 'says little about clothing, and not a great deal about men...
...He has stood for hours on the street corners in New York and London, notebook in hand, politely eavesdropping.'" "The old snooper 1" protested Euphemia...
...Don't be foolish," reprimanded the Doctor...
...So I wouldn't be able to shine at my brightest in giving you a sample unless you would agree to 'reciproce.'" "Very well," replied the Doctor, "let us pretend we've just been introduced and are seated side by side at a formal dinner...
...And I object to the English...
...than men," said Euphemia...
...Never strain to make a joke," scolded the Doctor...
...asked Euphemia, glancing ruefully at her engagement pad, which registered a cancelled engagement...
...If you were a big enough real-estate man, you'd forget business and talk of other things!' " "That's enough," yawned Euphemia...
...But continue...
...You men seem to think you know a great deal of women and what they talk about," remarked Euphemia...
...It's really extraordinary," said Angelicus...
...That looks like an advertisement," said Euphemia, glancing over his shoulder...
...Certainly, else why should I ask...
...If they had discussed real estate, I could have chatted with them easily, all evening.' " 'Business, always...
...Well," replied the Doctor, "I've been looking over the papers this morning, and they suggested it to me...
...Euphemia, what do you talk about when you are invited out to dine ?" "Would you really like to know, Doctor...
...Oh—and I was just getting started nicely," said Euphemia...
...Angelicus," she began, "that you are a man of parts...
...inquired the Doctor...
...Angelicas as he rose to go...
...Than clothing...
...Euphemia straightened up and began wielding a letteropener as though it were an oyster-fork...
...You are a very observant young lady...
...This scrap-book was compiled by an editor...
...What, for instance, would be your first remark...
...They have far more interesting things to discuss...
...What made you think particularly of conversation...
...Being of a big mind, I will ignore that," said Euphemia, "and will ask you why he didn't...
Vol. 5 • April 1927 • No. 22
