Sanctity certification services

Reimers, Adrian J.

.......................................... .......................................... Your distinctive life ...and...

...To get you may never be canonized is canonized you need to get noticed and MIONEY...
...He iii es it, Silent [3c )ttl, llldlrlltll, "14'!111 An,S' it'IJf'rtl)rl rl tltree=O/oIr Whom do / want fpllc•INIdre7t •• ?toile iftertiell'ed shot(k,I71Y' Op7n caiise conic befol'e tine Caret regcttion for the Causes of Saints...
...but the fact is: If you want credit for being a saint, you have to look like a saint...
...But the Little Flower has already done that...
...ordinations, and funerals...
...a,k,a...
...Don't delay...
...That is why number 1-500-2-GOOD-4-U and we'll S.C.S...
...TODAY arrange to have one of our trained could he your LAST CHANCE...
...But the Little money...
...BE HEARD...
...Life is short...
...You don't need to spend your life on a pillar...
...Giac•onto Panettiere, i,v a Pltilosophc•r and fi-ee-lance writer...
...Fortunately, you have S.C.S...
...ADRIAN J, REIMERS...
...Think of the surprise on the cardinals' and the father generals' faces when YOUR ADVOCATES from S.C.S come forward with enough money to cover al I the expenses of the proceedings...
...full of helpful hints for your own special appeal...
...We have arranged with reputable Italian bankers to deposit your own canonization processing "nest egg" in a high-yield account just off-shore from mainland Italy...
...Indiana, "wide nt,r wile curd tfn-ee ofoiu•fr~ta'c hilrlrett...
...To get canonized you need to get noticed and that means doing something distinctive...
...41 O 4,e,(1~ Giacomo Panettiere...
...That is why S.C.S...
...ADRIAN J, REIMERS...
...Let's face it...
...we will arrange to have one of our trained photographers take your picture in eight edifying poses...
...phlet listing ailments and situations for which there is NO PATRON Think of the surprise on the cardinals' SAINT...
...Simply write to us you want credit for being a saint...
...We at Sanctity Certification Services It might not seem fair...
...While your body slumbers in the grave...
...Fortunately...
...S.C.S...
...Holy cards It might not seem fair...
...You will also receive a helpful pamphlet listing ailments and situations for which there is NO PATRON SAINT...
...your de• You will also receive a helpful pam- posit will be building interest...
...Not every saint has to be a and the father Generals' faces when "general practitioner...
...Life is short...
...President funerals...
...and last of all The sad truth is that canonization takes money...
...the expenses of the proceedings...
...Be a specialist and you will «et noticed...
...That's right...
...Your distinctive life ...and last of all Okay, it's true-all you need to he a The sad truth is that canonization takes saint is a simple holy life...
...you have • With your registration at S.C.S...
...choose how you will look when your picture appears on cards at First Communions...
...YOU can choose how you will look when your picture appears on cards at First Communions...
...YOU WILL RECEIVE-at no extra cost-our helpful booklet...
...a.k.a...
...Who ever YOUR ADVOCATES from S.C.S come hears of them...
...All your preparations will be for nothing...
...YOU WILL RECEIVE-at no extra cost-our helpful booklet, • 1Ve have arranged with reputable Convincing the Cwwnists:: A Cata- Italian bankers~ to deposit your own logue of Ac•hiere inents and Ap- canonization processing "nest ego" proaches...
...Offers our "Holy Card Portrait" get your canonization preparations unservice, derway...
...you or call us at our convenient, toll-free have to look like a saint...
...we will Don't delay...
...22: 10 September 1993 Commonweal Commonweal I Your distinctive life Okay, it's true-all you need to be a saint is a simple holy life...
...Let's face it...
...show them that a well-prepared layperHoly cards son can he as holy as any priest or nun...
...offers our "Holy Card Portrait" ser ice...
...Unless you have a major religious order You don't need to spend your life on a or some pretty influential people on your pillar...
...Cotiiincin,i' the Canonises: A Catologue af'Ac•hiet•eltlenrs and Approac•hes...
...cause came before the Cnn>regatior1 for the Causes nfSaiit1s...
...YOU can Sincerely...
...TODAY could he your LAST CHANCE...
...your deposit will be building interest...
...President...
...We at Sanctity Certitjcation Services are here to serve you...
...that means doing something distinctive...
...Be a specialist and forward with enough money to cover all you will get noticed...
...and Giacomo Panettiere...
...For a modest additional fee...
...photographers take your picture in eight edifying poses...
...All your preparations will he for nothing...
...Sincerely...
...but the fact is: If are here to serve you...
...full of helpful hints for in a high-yield account just off-shore your own special appeal...
...10 September 1993: 23 nfSaiit1s...
...Anything that hasn't been done for 500 years will work...
...tort ofwhoni do / wattt irrten'ie ~i'ed shook...
...While your body slumbers in the grave...
...Anything that hasn't been done for side, your cause will just simply NEVER 500 years will work...
...You can...
...Perhaps the biggest reason why you may never be canonized is MONEY...
...For a modest additional fee...
...That's right...
...With `-our registration at S.C.S...
...Who ever hears of them...
...Not every saint has to be a "general practitioner...
...You can show them that a well-prepared layperson can he as holy as any priest or nun...
...ordinations...
...Perhaps the biggest reason why Flower has already done that...
...from mainland Italy...
...philoso Giucomo Panenicreis a pher, curd free-Iutue writer He limes in Sorrtit Bend...
...Simply write to us or call us at our convenient, toll-free number 1-500-2-GOOD-4-U and we'll get your canonization preparations underway...
...Commonwe...
...Unless you have a major religious order or some pretty influential people on your side, your cause will just simply NEVER BE HEARD...

Vol. 120 • September 1993 • No. 15


 
Developed by
Kanda Sofware
  Kanda Software, Inc.