The Continuing Crisis

T H E C O N T I N U I N G C R I S I S _9 May . . . the month passed with no nuclear war reported? Oh glory? Oh grandeur? Oh blessed relief? The little birds twirp twirp in the trees above. The...

...Speaking at the National Conference on Sexual Victimization of Children, poet and singer Mr...
...There a display of folk costumes featured a woman's dress made wholly from the air bladder of a giant fish...
...McKuen remained coy, but he believes that " t h e only means of prevention . . . is everybody who cares about anyone must get involved...
...of romance languages and their assorted allies wave placards and petitions below...
...9 The anti-nuke poetry is fevering .Japan where crowds of Admiral Yamamoto's descendants held an enormous "die-in" to demonstrate one of the more obvious points of the anti-nuke credenda...
...Unrest broke out anew in Poland...
...About precise details Mr...
...Pope Clement, after roughing up eight of his "bishops...
...Professor Singer has decided to delete from his popular course, "Psychology of Sex," homework options of engaging in homosexual, group, or extramarital sex--though the Prof...
...Rhode Island's Supreme Court upheld a lower court conviction of Mr...
...The worried Profs...
...James F. Tweedie who finished off a stray cat by cooking it in a microwave oven...
...The Spaceship Earth has slipped through another month...
...9 Meanwhile in Madison, Wisconsin two aborted fetuses greatly embarrassed the medical corps at Madison General Hospital by refusing to go quietly into their medically prescribed garbage bag...
...In London, the Duke of Edinburgh notified a somewhat downbeat meeting of the Council for Environmental Conservation that the British task force in the Falklands would probably be killing a sizable number of whales, due to naval sonar's inability to discern significant differences between cetaceans and hostile submarines--though hostile submarines consume considerably less sea life, discharge much less solid waste, and in all probability are less of a threat to the world's oceans...
...In Michigan, Truesdale Chapels, Inc., an esteemed mortuary accused of mistakenly cremating the corpse of Daniel P. Sullivan, reached a $75,000 court settlement with Mr...
...The Journal of the American Medical Association continued its fanatical campaign against jogging by reporting that middleaged men are seven times more likely to drop dead while jogging than while sitting in a chair...
...Lewis's experimental and flexible study contained material copied verbatim and without citation...
...J e f f r e y G. J anor of Cleveland Heights, Ohio, was fined $50 for publicly bastinadoing his automobile with a tire iron...
...T H E C O N T I N U I N G C R I S I S _9 May . . . the month passed with no nuclear war reported...
...Finally, woebegone liberals were given a brief little pick-me-up when a bolt of lightning killed Sinbad, a horse ridden by our President in the TV series "Death Valley Days...
...At the center of the storm is a facultymember Bert Corona, 63, a MarxistLeninist militant with no college degree but the majority of the Chicano dons behind him...
...Will he redouble his efforts on behalf of nuclear holocaust and the destruction of wildlife next month...
...The Roman Pope, John Paul lI, visited the Portuguese shrine of Fatima despite a zealot's attempt to impale him on a large knife, and late in the month the Pontiff visited England in a blue and yellow helicopter...
...Barbara Sancken of the Daily Leader of Pontiac, Illinois has made a powerful bid for a Pulitzer prize...
...In Ciudad Juarez, Mexico, most of those 15 million insect larvae taken hostage by disgruntled students perished when the dunderheads failed to maintain the proper temperature...
...Surrounded by agape newsmen, the Hayseed Pope declared that he had seen no evidence of religious repression in the Marxist-Leninist dream-come-true state and that the churches he had visited were at least as full as those in his hometown --though surely back home the Rev...
...And Mr...
...9 Early in the month the fiend Reagan announced a two-stage plan in which the United States and the Soviet Union might reduce their nuclear arsenals by a third...
...still believes such lucubrations "can be a very powerful growth and learning experience...
...Claus von Biilow was sentenced to 30 years in the hoosegow for trying to murder his wife twice...
...RET THE AMERICAN SPECTATOR JULY 1982 7...
...Billy Graham brought his trip to the USSR to a sublime culmination by speaking in tongues, to wit: the mysterious tongues of the Soviet Politburo...
...and the actress Miss Julie Christie has completed work on the British-American production of The Animal Film, castigating the "deadness of the mind that can commit these atrocities [medical experiments on animalsl without blinking, every day, exactly in the same way they are being committed, for example, in El Salvador today...
...Kids could be headed for difficult times...
...Actually, one, a 26-week-old girl, lived for 27 t/2 hours...
...9 On the education front, deputy Pennsylvania education secretary Mr...
...Does this happy pass irk Ronald Reagan...
...A former St...
...Acknowledging that his " s t u d y " contained long passages from other books without proper citation or even quotation marks, the rising educator explained that his study at Fairleigh Dickinson University had been a " f l e x i b l e " and "experimental" doctoral program...
...Warfare continues in the Chicano Studies Department of California State University, Los Angeles where faculty in-fighting over jobs and tenure has been accompanied by sabotaged automobiles, burntout garages, and other violent acts...
...Russell Kirk has written so rhapsodically and repeatedly...
...On May 12, the Rev...
...the other, a 24-week-old girl, lived 91/2 hours...
...Rod McKuen stated that he had been sexually abused in his early years by an aunt and uncle team...
...Meanwhile in Salamanca, Spain, hundreds of villagers nearly lynched a self-proclaimed anti-pope, the Rev...
...Louis member of the Guardian Angels youth patrol was convicted of lewd and lascivious behavior, though he still denies that he ever lowered his pants and exposed his private parts except to attend to exigent bodily functions and then only in privacy-" I got better taste than to do something like that," declared Mr...
...He would be much relieved if someone else were in the White House, someone with the eyes of a baby seal, someone you could believe in...
...Burnie M. Hill, 24...
...9 By uncovering irrefragable evidence that Miss Ann Landers has been recycling columns from the mid1960s, investigative reporter Mrs...
...And the anti-vivisection movement in Britain and America continues to gain adepts: In London stalwarts of the Animal Liberation Front--all from the species Homo sapiens-freed a large number of rabbits from the death row of a laboratory...
...It is a possibility that your average peace demonstrator cannot rule out...
...9 In church news, the Rev...
...Finally, laxness continues to spread throughout academe as can be seen by the decision of Professor Barry Singer of California State University at Long Beach...
...Jack " T r e e t o p " Strauss has won the World Series of Poker in Las Vegas, and Iranian Revolutionary Guards beat hell out of a Teheran dentist when they caught the rascal furtively stuffing women's colored underwear into the trunk of his American-made automobile...
...The news slammed many of Miss Landers's 70 million readers into the mulligrubs, but conservatives were quick to observe that the enduring interest of the columns is proof of the existence of those eternal verities about which Dr...
...Sun Myung Moon, oracle and chief executive officer of the Unification Church, Inc., with branches in most major American cities and all plush suburbs, was found guilty in Manhattan of conspiring to defraud the government and of filing false income-tax returns...
...9 Evidence that Soviet fashiondesigners are really serious about toppling Paris as the world's fashion capital was provided in prodigious abundance at an exhibit in elegant Smolensk...
...Graham's flock is not so heavily armed or so well-equipped with pocket transmitters...
...And those 17,000 fetuses and embryos discovered earlier this year in a repossessed shipping container in California will be commemorated in a religious service endorsed late in the month by President Reagan...
...9 In related matters, the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to animals publicly deplored a London pest control firm's plan to exterminate wild cats inhabiting subways near North Middlesex Hospital where they have disturbed the chaste thoughts of many local, ladies by surreptitiously rubbing their furry sides against the ladies' legs...
...Ronald H. Lewis, who was recently nominated to become New Jersey's education commissioner is denying charges that his "doctoral study" was a bouillabaisse of plagiarisms...
...Sullivan's heirs and assigns...
...According to the Newark Star Ledger, 66 of the 121 pages of Mr...

Vol. 15 • July 1982 • No. 7


 
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