And Toto Too?
Nollson, John
fearsome time for old Democrats. Alerted to the arrival of the customary Republican tornado, whole families take refuge in theii cellars until the storm passes and the damage can be assessed. It...
...Why, maybe I wouldn't even let them burn coal in the winter, no matter how cold it got...
...asked Dorothy...
...Yes, the great Oz did remember them from the old days...
...One day, they dumped me by the roadside, where I have been until the very moment you found me...
...Why, the next thing you'll be telling us is that there's no yellow brick road either...
...How can I help you...
...Perhaps if I give you my resume you'll take it to Oz for me, and he will send his retainers out here to rescue me...
...Humpf," said Dorothy, after placing her sixth telephone call, leaving only one useless dime, "I'm beginning to wonder whether there really is any Oz at all...
...But then the demonstrators stopped coming and they had no further use for me...
...Excuse me, sir," said Dorothy...
...Don't worry, Tin Man," said Dorothy reassuringly...
...No Oz...
...In fact, I'm not very brave at all...
...Gee," said the Tin Man after a while, "things sure have changed since I was around here...
...Fairly soon, they reached the highway and they decided to stop for a rest at a roadside picnic place...
...But everyone knows there is one, and everyone knows where it leads...
...Please don't give up," said the Cowardly Lion...
...Dorothy was touched by the pleading tone in the Tin Man's voice and decided that she could not leave him there by the roadside...
...The wind had died down, but not before it blew skyward hundreds of white sheets of paper...
...It was hard to make them out, they were all so different...
...You're not very frightening for a lion," Dorothy said...
...Well, we will just have to find our way back...
...But how else can I get people to be afraid of me...
...Why, then I'm sure I'll be able to find all the oil I need so that I can be lithe and limber once again...
...Dorothy rushed to assist him, while the Tin Man creaked behind...
...They learned from a friendly policeman where the great Oz had his office, but an unfriendly policeman at the main door refused to let them in...
...They set out in what they thought was a westerly direction...
...But I know that as soon as the great Oz hears that I'm back in town, he'll let me have my old job back...
...No one would be able to do anything unless I permitted it...
...I served in the Eisenhower administration, and they haven't been lubricated since...
...But there aren't any demonstrators anymore," said Dorothy...
...I would like to help you," said the man, "but I'm quite incapable of helping anyone...
...Just try one more telephone call...
...Unfortunately, Mr...
...That wasn't very nice," said Dorothy, disapprovingly...
...Yes, they should check back with the great Oz in the morning...
...I am the Scarecrow, and I'll be your friend for ever and ever...
...asked Dorothy...
...So Dorothy, Toto, the Tin Man, and the Scarecrow all set out to find the great Oz...
...The rest of you can spend the rest of your lives trying to get through to this Oz of yours...
...No, it was quite impossible...
...But all we have left is one dime, and that's not enough," Dorothy protested...
...The only person I scare is me...
...Yes, child," the prone man continued, "I'm the Scarecrow, and I'm never going to make it back to Washington to see the great Oz...
...Why would everyone be afraid of you...
...Fortunately they were gently deposited in a large grassy spot...
...My joints have been stiff for many years...
...in fact, they had come to rest not far from the famous Washington Monument in Washington, D.C...
...Yes, I guess not," answered the Cowardly Lion...
...But you are young and sprightly...
...Because I'd be a regulator...
...Well, not yet," the Scarecrow agreed, "Jut they'll be back...
...Dorothy noticed that there did indeed seem to be straw poking out through every seam of the man's rather florid clothing...
...But since the time this story was first written, the cost of a telephone call has risen to fifteen cents...
...And, true to her word, Dorothy stuffed the man with grass and, with a stitch or two, .he seemed as good as new...
...He was studying a piece of paper that looked a lot like the ones Dorothy had seen floating in the air...
...It was no different for Dorothy in November of 1980...
...Well, I still don't believe you," said Dorothy, "and I'm going back to Kansas...
...I was a member of President Nixon's staff...
...Why, child, of course there's an Oz...
...This time the wind was far stronger than expected, so great that Dorothy and her dog were lifted out of their cellar and blown hundreds of miles to the East...
...No, it was not known when the great Oz would return because he was in a meeting...
...Of course, the great Oz believed they could make a useful contribution to the new America...
...They fell silent...
...Yes," said Dorothy, "and all our friends in Kansas will be terribly worried...
...Dorothy watched them float down to earth, and she picked up one or two of them to see what they said...
...Yes, I am," answered the prone figure, "my insides have been leaking and I am no longer able to stand erect...
...Arf, arf, Oz is...
...I shall gather up some of this dried grass and, in a jiffy, you'll be good as new...
...Who knows, maybe he'll be back from his meeting...
...Every so often they would prop me up against the iron fence to frighten all those demonstrators...
...Toto," said Dorothy to her faithful canine companion, "I don't think we're in Kansas any more...
...Toto and I will help you get to Washington so that you can meet the great Oz...
...Dear me,"'' said Dorothy, her voice showing grave concern, "you do seem to be in something of a pickle...
...Oh," said the Tin Man with great poignancy, "Oh, if only I can get to see the great Oz in Washington, or even his secretary...
...That wouldn't be very nice," said Dorothy...
...You see," said the Scarecrow, "I used to work at the White House...
...Oz was not in at the moment, but he would be back to them as soon as he could...
...said the Tin Man, the Scarecrow, and the Cowardly Lion in unison...
...Thank you, little girl," said the man, clearly pleased with his new shape...
...Fortunately, Dorothy had a dollar bill which, she thought, could be converted into ten dimes for ten telephone calls...
...It's getting late, and if we don't get home soon, we will miss our dinner...
...her aunt had seen the funnel cloud on the horizon and she shooed the children into the shelter...
...I'm the Tin Man, you see, and my joints are so stiff from want of oiling that I am barely able to move...
...They gathered around a telephone booth and dialed the great Oz's number...
...They got an early start and reached the capital about lunchtime...
...They had not gone very far when they noticed what appeared to be a man lying by the side of the road...
...Arf," said Toto in approval...
...And with that, -she helped the Tin Man to his feet and managed to get him walking again, even though his joints, to tell the truth, creaked quite noticeably...
...They had not gone all that very far when they came upon a motley-looking lion...
...No," the lion agreed, "I'm not very frightening at all...
...I'm a quite cowardly lion, you see...
...It's a rough game," said the Scarecow, knowingly...
...But I'm sure that if I were able to see the great Oz, he'd give me a very important position in the government, and then everyone would be afraid of me...
...Oh, there's no need for that," said Dorothy, as Toto wagged his tail in agree- ment...
...They noticed a funny-looking man at one of the tables...
...There's always been an Oz and there always will be...
...But I don't think you'll ever find him...
...It was getting late now, so the five of them decided to go to sleep and resume their journey in the morning...
...I don't know how we're ever going to get home," the little dog replied...
...But why would a scarecrow want to see the great Oz in Washington, D.C...
...Dorothy asked...
...Why, in the good old days, you could call Oz collect...
...I certainly don't know," said Dorothy, "But from what I've heard, the great Oz is a wise and kindly man, and I'm sure he'll be able to think of lots of other ways for you to get your courage back...
...He looked up at the four of them, but he could manage only the faintest roar...
...the great Oz's secretary was not authorized to give out his home number, nor even his home address...
...I was hoping that you would be able to help me...
...Toto and I are trying to find our way back to Kansas, and I wonder whether you could help us...
...Yes, the great Oz did have a post office box, but it was filled to overflowing...
...But every oneyof them had the same word neatly printed across the top: RESUME...
...Oh, if only I can get him to look at my re'sum...
Vol. 14 • February 1981 • No. 2
